...the son of Joseph and Mary...God in human form...a carpenter...a political figure...a healer...a miracle worker...a martyr...loved...hated...and currently worshipped by a greater amount of people than of any other faith. But did you know the he is also...a Vampire Hunter?!? Oh, yes. It is true, my friends. And the following information shall prove it!
"Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter"
Directed by Lee Demarbre
"The second coming is upon us, and Jesus has returned to Earth. But before he can get down to the serious business of judging the living and the dead, he has to contend with an army of vampires that can walk in the daylight. Combining Kung-fu action with Biblical prophecy and a liberal dose of humor, the film teams the Savior with Mexican wrestling hero El Santos against mythological horrors and science gone mad and also manages to address contemporary sexual politics. And did we mention that it's a musical? This sure ain't Sunday school."
MORE... Still don't believe me? Well, see for yourself then. Click the button below.
AH! Now you have seen it, my child. Thou must now joineth me in mine prayers that a fellow believer shall buyeth me this blessed film (on most holy VHS format) for mine birthday of nine and twenty years thus lived and shall be celebrateth on December 30th; a mere 5 days after Christ himself sprung forth from Mary's loins. Yea, let us rejoice whence, thou, most wonderful and generous of my brethren, shelleth out thine bucks of 20 (plus 5 for that which is most blasphemous shipping and handling) whence thou visiteth the URL below. For kindness begets kindness begets points with God begets a golden halo rather than the rusty hubcaps that may be seen in the ghettos of Heaven.
*More About "Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter", Including How To Purchase A Copy*