The Future
My past entries were always about the past and as I grow older, I'm starting to realize that I'm looking forward to the future. I don't know if many people can say that but when I look at the future I look at the options that anyone of us can take.
The options are hard, sometimes simple, sometimes its just complicated. What ever life brings to me, sometimes maybe its just destiny that brings people together. The life that one takes to him self is predetermine or a matter of choice.
As I get closer and closer to the end of my contract, the economy is finally catching up to me as job security is raise in the air. The future to this job is in jeopardy and as some panic, I stay resolve. An omen of great news or bad news. The difference with this omen is that its doesn't matter what the future hold anymore. Not to me, because of the work and effort I have proven to myself. Choices I have made and done, people question, people advise, and people trust in me.
My life hasn't been too hard but at the same time my life haven't been too easy. I think people tend to forget that the world around them is just there and the small things that people tend to forget is what matters. Life in general has been good to me and what else can I ask for.
Sometimes I just sit a little and think about my philosophy, my self centered, my stubbornness, my goals. Why does it matter, and I will have that feeling of nihilism in my head. I tend to forget that my money doesn't matter, or the girls, or the play. Its just that I'm so tired at times at looking at the future and setting up the future. I think I have setup the future so well that I haven't made a flaw that the only mistake is that flaw.
I been playing it conservative but as I envy my friends that at home playing football, or just hanging out. I find it funny how I am doing it all backwards. I'll come back people will have their degrees and be looking for a job, while I'll be going to school and have no loans.
It is funny, if someone ask me what my future holds, I can tell them in a blink of an eye. The problem is sometimes I just don't want to know. The fear of unknowing seem to be what drives myself to do a lot of great things. The fear, the anxiety, and the excitement. Using it for the positive, rather than the negative.
I'm looking for that destiny still, I searched for it in High School, I searched it in the Marine Corps, I've searched for it in Iraq and the sandy storms told me of great dreams and great wars for things to come. A dream that was the beginning of my life that I will prove to myself. One day I will be famous and people will one day know my name.
I know it is hard to come by but I get there sooner or later because I'm determine. That is what my future hold...
The options are hard, sometimes simple, sometimes its just complicated. What ever life brings to me, sometimes maybe its just destiny that brings people together. The life that one takes to him self is predetermine or a matter of choice.
As I get closer and closer to the end of my contract, the economy is finally catching up to me as job security is raise in the air. The future to this job is in jeopardy and as some panic, I stay resolve. An omen of great news or bad news. The difference with this omen is that its doesn't matter what the future hold anymore. Not to me, because of the work and effort I have proven to myself. Choices I have made and done, people question, people advise, and people trust in me.
My life hasn't been too hard but at the same time my life haven't been too easy. I think people tend to forget that the world around them is just there and the small things that people tend to forget is what matters. Life in general has been good to me and what else can I ask for.
Sometimes I just sit a little and think about my philosophy, my self centered, my stubbornness, my goals. Why does it matter, and I will have that feeling of nihilism in my head. I tend to forget that my money doesn't matter, or the girls, or the play. Its just that I'm so tired at times at looking at the future and setting up the future. I think I have setup the future so well that I haven't made a flaw that the only mistake is that flaw.
I been playing it conservative but as I envy my friends that at home playing football, or just hanging out. I find it funny how I am doing it all backwards. I'll come back people will have their degrees and be looking for a job, while I'll be going to school and have no loans.
It is funny, if someone ask me what my future holds, I can tell them in a blink of an eye. The problem is sometimes I just don't want to know. The fear of unknowing seem to be what drives myself to do a lot of great things. The fear, the anxiety, and the excitement. Using it for the positive, rather than the negative.
I'm looking for that destiny still, I searched for it in High School, I searched it in the Marine Corps, I've searched for it in Iraq and the sandy storms told me of great dreams and great wars for things to come. A dream that was the beginning of my life that I will prove to myself. One day I will be famous and people will one day know my name.
I know it is hard to come by but I get there sooner or later because I'm determine. That is what my future hold...