100 moods: Crushed, X/S, R
Title: Crushed
Fandom: Buffy The Vampire Slayer
Characters: Xander/Spike
Prompt: crushed
Word Count: 1278
Rating: Adult
Warning/Spoilers: Umm, S4 roughly, but no real spoilers and definitely no warnings.
Summary: Explanations! and Kissing and Fluff and a little Angsty Romance
Author's Note: TOTALLY unbeta'd. I barely even did the spell check, so if you spot problems, let me know.
Previously:
The sultry, slow, dark taste of Spike is what he wanted and he realized that he’d never settle for anything else. But he had to know.
He pulled out of the kiss and leaned his forehead against Spike’s, panting at the overwhelming sensations coursing through him. The hand that had cltched a fistful of Spike’s t-shirt relaxed, and Xander patted the hard chest beneath it. He sniffed, a sharp inhale of air before looking up at Spike and asking the question he’d been dying to know the answer to for the last three weeks.
“Why didn’t you trust me, Spike?”
Cool hands drifted down Xander’s arms, fingers wrapping themselves around his and Spike leaned in to drop a quick, closed-mouth kiss on his lips.
“Do we have to do this now, pet? I’m here. What do I have to say?”
Xander shoved Spike away from him and took a step back. “You’re not seriously going to stand there and think that a kiss and grope against my door is going to solve this, are you?” He glanced up at Spike’s face and could feel the exasperation floating up from his gut. The pouting lips, the tilted head, the fucking eyes that always got Spike whatever he wanted. Son of a bitch. He shook his head, almost laughing at the predictability of his vampire. “Of course you are.” He sighed, walking further into the apartment.
“What can I say, Xan? It’s always worked before, you know.”
Xander flopped down on his sofa, eyes rolling shut as Spike winced under the strong silence.
The swish of leather and the thud of boots on his carpet told Xander that Spike finally moved from the doorway. The sofa sank a little to his left, and Spike’s fingers once again were wrapping around his. He let them lift his hand and pull it over to rest on Spike’s thigh. He’d missed the connection between them.
It had been a while since he’d touched anyone, not even Willow or Buffy, and Jake had been all wrong. But, and he couldn’t believe he was letting this happen again, Spike’s hand on his was right. His hand on Spike’s thigh was right. The gentle slope of the sofa cushion under Spike’s unique weight was right. Everything about this moment was right. Except the way he felt.
“It’s not working now, Spike.”
And there was the damned sigh. The fucker only breathed when it suited him, when he could make people forget what he was, and Spike was really fantastically good at calling those moments and using them, the opportunist. “Don’t,” he whispered. “Don’t sit there and sigh, pretend to be something you’re not and think I’ll let this go. I may be a little slow sometimes, but I know when I’m being worked over. I especially know when you’re the one working me over.”
Spike lifted his hand again, and let his thumb swirl over Xander’s palm. “’M not.”
The pout that Xander knew so well filtered through the words, and he had to grin. “Yes, you are.” He closed his fingers quickly over Spike’s circling thumb. “But it’s okay. I get it.”
Spike blinked, his blue eyes shifting to glance at Xander. “And?”
“Just tell me why you didn’t trust me. That’s all I need to know.” Xander rolled his head along the back of the couch to look fully at Spike. “I did this for you, you know. Finding the apartment, getting us out of that hole under my parents’ house, and you left me. I just - I want to know why.”
Spike let go of Xander’s hand and folded his arms. “Wasn’t gonna be my place. You picked it. Never even told me about it. Just decided and signed and wanted me to follow along like a good little pet.” Spike sniffed sharply, disdain lifting his brow, and Xander frowned.
“That’s not - ”
“What you meant to do?” Spike shrugged. “Doesn’t matter. ‘S what ya did. Packed me up lock, stock and barrel with not so much as a by your leave. And expected me to come. Know who else used to do that?”
Realization slammed Xander’s eyes closed and his stomach heaved. He swallowed quickly, painfully, the hard and heavy lump that had lodged in his throat burned its way back down. He hadn’t thought, and to be compared in that way to Angelus shook him. The weight of what he’d done without thinking crushed him. “I didn’t even think. I was just…” His lungs ached and he inhaled sharply, then sighed it all out again. “I wanted us out of there and together and away from my parents and here was this place with its perfect sun exposure and I know how much you like the light but can’t, you know…and I just took it. Thought you’d like it and wanted out as much as I did and I just didn’t think about before. There was only you and me in my head.”
Spike chuckled. “Well, as pleasant and crowded as it is to be in your head..”
“Shut up.” Xander swatted at him, not surprised when Spike grabbed his hand and brought it up to his lips.
“Know ya did what ya did for me, luv. Well, now I do. Having the Slayer pound it in will make ya see straight. Next time, just..give a bloke some warning. Little choice, yeah?” And again, cool lips brushed the back of Xander’s hand.
Then the words that had been whispered hit him. His eyes popped open. “Next time?”
Spike grinned and Xander stared at the lines around those bright blue eyes. Crow’s feet. Laugh lines. Lines he’d missed - hadn’t seen - when they’d been together before. His hand drifted up to touch them.
Spike’s eyes followed Xander’s hand to the side of his face, then they closed as Xander traced his skin. “Caught that, did ya?” he whispered, pressing into Xander’s hand.
Xander smiled. “I like the sound of next time.”
“Come here,” Spike said, and Xander slid over, fingers curling over the back of Spike’s head, mussing up the gelled curls and he fastened his lips over Spike’s.
This time it was a leisurely kiss, each tasting and exploring territory they’d thought abandoned for good. Spike’s lips were still soft and malleable, and Xander’s were still strong and seeking. He could feel Spike’s grin under his lips, and his desire to own that grin had him opening his lips further and sliding his tongue along the crease of Spike’s mouth, asking for entrance and, upon permission, plundering that sweet darkness.
Spike shifted, sliding his arm around Xander’s waist. Xander gasped as Spike lifted him bodily out of the couch to settle him over his lap. Spike’s hands settled into the waist of Xander’s jeans.
Xander pulled out of the kiss, the delicious little smack that was his lips leaving Spike’s made him grin. He looked over his shoulder at Spike’s hands in his jeans. “Hmm.” He turned back to look at Spike, who cocked a teasing eyebrow at him as his fingers dug further into Xander’s jeans. “You plan on getting lucky, Spike?”
Spike’s fingers dug into his flesh in answer, and Xander’s eyes rolled back as he groaned. “Umm, yeah. Okay,” he said, then shook his head, clearing his fogged out brain. “You gonna be here in the morning?” he asked in what he hoped was a totally casual way, but knew he failed when Spike’s eyebrow came back down, and his hands came from out of the back of Xander’s jeans to curl over his jaw.
Spike kissed him, a gentle meeting of lips and smiled, letting his thumb trace the edges of Xander’s mouth like it was a precious stone. “I plan on it.”
Xander swallowed, searching Spike’s face for any trace of a lie. “How about the next day?”
“Xander,” Spike said, utterly serious, and it was so unusual that Xander shut his mouth completely and stared, listening. “I plan on being here tomorrow. The next day. And forever. If you want me to be.”
“Even when I’m old and grey and you’re still young and beautiful?”
“Oh, fuck. Yes. Even then.”
Xander clasped his hands around Spike’s wrists and brought both hands around to his mouth to be kissed. He laughed. “Then don’t you think we'd better get off the couch?”
Fandom: Buffy The Vampire Slayer
Characters: Xander/Spike
Prompt: crushed
Word Count: 1278
Rating: Adult
Warning/Spoilers: Umm, S4 roughly, but no real spoilers and definitely no warnings.
Summary: Explanations! and Kissing and Fluff and a little Angsty Romance
Author's Note: TOTALLY unbeta'd. I barely even did the spell check, so if you spot problems, let me know.
Previously:
The sultry, slow, dark taste of Spike is what he wanted and he realized that he’d never settle for anything else. But he had to know.
He pulled out of the kiss and leaned his forehead against Spike’s, panting at the overwhelming sensations coursing through him. The hand that had cltched a fistful of Spike’s t-shirt relaxed, and Xander patted the hard chest beneath it. He sniffed, a sharp inhale of air before looking up at Spike and asking the question he’d been dying to know the answer to for the last three weeks.
“Why didn’t you trust me, Spike?”
Cool hands drifted down Xander’s arms, fingers wrapping themselves around his and Spike leaned in to drop a quick, closed-mouth kiss on his lips.
“Do we have to do this now, pet? I’m here. What do I have to say?”
Xander shoved Spike away from him and took a step back. “You’re not seriously going to stand there and think that a kiss and grope against my door is going to solve this, are you?” He glanced up at Spike’s face and could feel the exasperation floating up from his gut. The pouting lips, the tilted head, the fucking eyes that always got Spike whatever he wanted. Son of a bitch. He shook his head, almost laughing at the predictability of his vampire. “Of course you are.” He sighed, walking further into the apartment.
“What can I say, Xan? It’s always worked before, you know.”
Xander flopped down on his sofa, eyes rolling shut as Spike winced under the strong silence.
The swish of leather and the thud of boots on his carpet told Xander that Spike finally moved from the doorway. The sofa sank a little to his left, and Spike’s fingers once again were wrapping around his. He let them lift his hand and pull it over to rest on Spike’s thigh. He’d missed the connection between them.
It had been a while since he’d touched anyone, not even Willow or Buffy, and Jake had been all wrong. But, and he couldn’t believe he was letting this happen again, Spike’s hand on his was right. His hand on Spike’s thigh was right. The gentle slope of the sofa cushion under Spike’s unique weight was right. Everything about this moment was right. Except the way he felt.
“It’s not working now, Spike.”
And there was the damned sigh. The fucker only breathed when it suited him, when he could make people forget what he was, and Spike was really fantastically good at calling those moments and using them, the opportunist. “Don’t,” he whispered. “Don’t sit there and sigh, pretend to be something you’re not and think I’ll let this go. I may be a little slow sometimes, but I know when I’m being worked over. I especially know when you’re the one working me over.”
Spike lifted his hand again, and let his thumb swirl over Xander’s palm. “’M not.”
The pout that Xander knew so well filtered through the words, and he had to grin. “Yes, you are.” He closed his fingers quickly over Spike’s circling thumb. “But it’s okay. I get it.”
Spike blinked, his blue eyes shifting to glance at Xander. “And?”
“Just tell me why you didn’t trust me. That’s all I need to know.” Xander rolled his head along the back of the couch to look fully at Spike. “I did this for you, you know. Finding the apartment, getting us out of that hole under my parents’ house, and you left me. I just - I want to know why.”
Spike let go of Xander’s hand and folded his arms. “Wasn’t gonna be my place. You picked it. Never even told me about it. Just decided and signed and wanted me to follow along like a good little pet.” Spike sniffed sharply, disdain lifting his brow, and Xander frowned.
“That’s not - ”
“What you meant to do?” Spike shrugged. “Doesn’t matter. ‘S what ya did. Packed me up lock, stock and barrel with not so much as a by your leave. And expected me to come. Know who else used to do that?”
Realization slammed Xander’s eyes closed and his stomach heaved. He swallowed quickly, painfully, the hard and heavy lump that had lodged in his throat burned its way back down. He hadn’t thought, and to be compared in that way to Angelus shook him. The weight of what he’d done without thinking crushed him. “I didn’t even think. I was just…” His lungs ached and he inhaled sharply, then sighed it all out again. “I wanted us out of there and together and away from my parents and here was this place with its perfect sun exposure and I know how much you like the light but can’t, you know…and I just took it. Thought you’d like it and wanted out as much as I did and I just didn’t think about before. There was only you and me in my head.”
Spike chuckled. “Well, as pleasant and crowded as it is to be in your head..”
“Shut up.” Xander swatted at him, not surprised when Spike grabbed his hand and brought it up to his lips.
“Know ya did what ya did for me, luv. Well, now I do. Having the Slayer pound it in will make ya see straight. Next time, just..give a bloke some warning. Little choice, yeah?” And again, cool lips brushed the back of Xander’s hand.
Then the words that had been whispered hit him. His eyes popped open. “Next time?”
Spike grinned and Xander stared at the lines around those bright blue eyes. Crow’s feet. Laugh lines. Lines he’d missed - hadn’t seen - when they’d been together before. His hand drifted up to touch them.
Spike’s eyes followed Xander’s hand to the side of his face, then they closed as Xander traced his skin. “Caught that, did ya?” he whispered, pressing into Xander’s hand.
Xander smiled. “I like the sound of next time.”
“Come here,” Spike said, and Xander slid over, fingers curling over the back of Spike’s head, mussing up the gelled curls and he fastened his lips over Spike’s.
This time it was a leisurely kiss, each tasting and exploring territory they’d thought abandoned for good. Spike’s lips were still soft and malleable, and Xander’s were still strong and seeking. He could feel Spike’s grin under his lips, and his desire to own that grin had him opening his lips further and sliding his tongue along the crease of Spike’s mouth, asking for entrance and, upon permission, plundering that sweet darkness.
Spike shifted, sliding his arm around Xander’s waist. Xander gasped as Spike lifted him bodily out of the couch to settle him over his lap. Spike’s hands settled into the waist of Xander’s jeans.
Xander pulled out of the kiss, the delicious little smack that was his lips leaving Spike’s made him grin. He looked over his shoulder at Spike’s hands in his jeans. “Hmm.” He turned back to look at Spike, who cocked a teasing eyebrow at him as his fingers dug further into Xander’s jeans. “You plan on getting lucky, Spike?”
Spike’s fingers dug into his flesh in answer, and Xander’s eyes rolled back as he groaned. “Umm, yeah. Okay,” he said, then shook his head, clearing his fogged out brain. “You gonna be here in the morning?” he asked in what he hoped was a totally casual way, but knew he failed when Spike’s eyebrow came back down, and his hands came from out of the back of Xander’s jeans to curl over his jaw.
Spike kissed him, a gentle meeting of lips and smiled, letting his thumb trace the edges of Xander’s mouth like it was a precious stone. “I plan on it.”
Xander swallowed, searching Spike’s face for any trace of a lie. “How about the next day?”
“Xander,” Spike said, utterly serious, and it was so unusual that Xander shut his mouth completely and stared, listening. “I plan on being here tomorrow. The next day. And forever. If you want me to be.”
“Even when I’m old and grey and you’re still young and beautiful?”
“Oh, fuck. Yes. Even then.”
Xander clasped his hands around Spike’s wrists and brought both hands around to his mouth to be kissed. He laughed. “Then don’t you think we'd better get off the couch?”