Day 12, I hope you have popcorn
Big Day August 13th, Day 12
How do I start this one up? Not really sure. Well, lets get the ball rolling that I woke up at 5:00am. I ate something. I don’t remember what; it was too early at the time. To be honest my first real memory is meeting Ai half way down the stairs. She had on a polo and regular jeans, but the seams had rainbow colors on them. She also wore Velcro dc sneakers. Shit my ass is observant. We both ran to the bottom of the stairs, where our story begins.
It is first floor of the Asahi building complex that I meet both of Ai’s parents, Mr. and Mrs. Funaki. They were the type of Japanese people that looked about 10 or 15 years younger than they actually were. Very cool people I would come to learn. I was also met with two other things that should be discussed from the outset; their mode of transportation and their demonic dog affectionately though inaccurately named Puppy.
Let us begin with the Honda Alphonse. Its name is not the Alphonse, but it’s as close as I can remember, since I can’t seem to find it on the Japanese Honda site. In either event this vehicle is at odds with most of the road worthy automobiles I have encountered here in Japan. While most cars on this Island are of the smaller sort, the Alphonse was a monstrosity. It was like a soccer mom van on steroids. I believe there is brief video available on it in my previous post. Not very intimidating on the outside I must say, but within the belly of this beast its true nature is revealed. I am pretty sure the Knicks could hold practice inside this thing. It had a row of seats just chilling, not even active in it. It had GPS and TV. It read Minidisks for Christ’s sake.
An aside for Brad if he has in fact been reading this; I know Corbo and the rest of us made fun of you both in front of you and behind your back regarding the MD format and your stubbornness (surprise!) in defending it, but take comfort in the fact that you would be in like-minded company here. Here in Japan, MD is a valid media type, not just some laughed at Betamax buddy.
So yes, this road monster was parked in front of my apartment, and it somehow didn’t eat my apartment building or intimidate it from moving on its own Tokyo-3 style. The back of super van opened to reveal another type of beast; Puppy, a Chinese Pekinese (sp?) male. This thing had an angry, unadorable face with teeth akin to rusty crack needles. It also never really shut up. You know me folks, I love dogs, and dogs love me. To this day I still think I may have encountered some sort of genetic splicer array with a dog and left the scene with some of the chromosomes. I love them. This yipping machine though, this quadruped which I will not give the honor of the moniker “dog” I did not love. It attacked me at every opportunity and peed in my general direction. It was lucky I was trying to make a good impression with its masters; else wise I may have used its body to test my field goal kicking abilities.
So a few pleasantries ensue with Ai’s family and I am then asked to enter the van and begin the journey. I met Ai’s younger brother Dai here. Yes, Dai and Ai. I love their parents. This boy was 13, but of course looked like he was 9 or 10 since once again, we are in Japan folks. His time on this trip was mostly taken up with stealing his sister’s keitai and disappearing at random during the trip. We formed a pretty solid bond off the bat by pulling pincer maneuvers on his sister to steal her phone. He’d distract, I’d take it, place it in the seat behind me. Ai would then turn to me, and Dai would then remove the keitai from the back seat. Flawless. Throughout the trip I would throw him a random “Oi, Dai, diajoubu ka?” (sp all up in that shit).
So we drove to Fukushima, to a town that Ai’s mother was born in, to pay respects to her family who has passed. That is the point of this weekend and into Tuesday; it is known as obone (or abone?) holiday, when Japanese go back home to pay respects to their ancestors. On the ride there I made some conversation with everyone in both Japanese and English. It was great; I really had a chance to see how bad my Japanese was. As it turns out I have mastered very simple conversation and can interject random simple phrases with relative ease. I can tell what people are talking about generally too. I just have trouble saying it, and keeping past/present in the whole thing correctly. Still, knowing anything impresses the Japanese and the Funaki family was no different. They were jazzed whenever I dropped a “careful!” or “how are you?” in Japanese. Gotta love them though.
So we all talked about cars and America until we arrived at our destination. Oh jeez, I forgot a somewhat personal element that affects my view on the rest of my time on this trip, quite literally. Though my contacts felt fine going in this morning, about an hour and a half into the drive my left contact became so irritated I had to relieve it of duty. So yes, I could only really see out of one eye the entire trip. I looked like Guts of Berserk fame; one eye shut and looking tall with a group of random people. I have to admit it was a bit annoying, but it all worked out. I’m just glad the other contact stayed in.
So, destination number one on this crazy day was the grave of Ai’s mother’s ancestors. It was a very sunny day, so I suppose one could say the weather was perfect. Interesting thing to note is that we did not go to a cemetery; the graves/shrines/what have you were maybe 15 or 20 together right on the side of the road through town, near the homes of where they lived. I am under the impression but not distinct knowledge that this is how it is done, creating a more personal, reflective experience. Ai’s mother exited the car and put on a black newsboy hat as she walked towards the graves. It was odd, she looked young to begin with, and the hat made her even younger looking. Together the family cleaned off the grave and made an offering and prayers. I did not really know my place in the situation, but occasionally Ai would signal for me to come closer, as if it was okay. At one point Ai and Dai began lighting incense. I did my part by doing some lighting and blocking the wind. It was simple stuff, but I at least felt somewhat helpful in doing so.
The incense was then placed into the shine and the parents said their respective prayers. It was a quick process, but it was done in a way that contained both casual and formal elements. The moment itself was formal; regarding prayers and incense, but the nature of the family is one that Dai was still playing tricks on Ai as this was going on. I liked it.
So after this we walked to some houses and met with some of Ai’s mother’s old neighbors. For the most part it was the family introducing themselves and giving a gift. This happened maybe 5 times, but the experience stuck in my mind for two of them;
I generally stayed on the outskirts of the house when the family went in, and waved from the door or in this case, started petting the dog hiding in the shade. I was then called by Ai who told me to come in. Apparently the family wanted to know who the gaijin was standing outside the door. I ripped off my shoes and hopped into the house and fast but formally as I could. Upon entering I was met with a middle aged woman and her young daughter (I presume). In the room to my left was a woman on a bed in her PJs and a man in a wheel chair with a rather smiley disposition. I’m not sure how I was introduced, at first I think they family thought I was Ai’s boyfriend. I think they ended up on agreeing that Ai had a great relationship with previous JETs and hence I was being shown around. I don‘t know, my Japanese is not that good.
What happened next was something I was kind of accustomed to now with introductions. The family figured I knew limited Japanese, asked a couple quick questions and then talked amongst each other. They of course wanted to involve me in the conversation, but I was incapable. I saw it most from the smiling man in the wheelchair who was curious about me, but knew not where to start what to say or most importantly, how to say it. We looked at one another, but didn’t know where to start. I was lucky though, I found our middle ground with a quick glance to my right.
“Ahhh, custom desktopu?” I exclaimed as I pointed to the heavily modded pc I saw in the corner.
“Ah, hia, Windows XP Professional!” he returned. We then quickly started going back and forth about RAM and CPU clock speeds. I was impressed he rigged an entire dual core machine from scratch; he thought it was cool that I had a dual processor in my laptop. It was simple stuff really, but that wasn’t the point. We talked this man and me. That was the point, that is the struggle here, and it always feels good when you overcome it. Before I knew it I was called by the Funaki’s, already out the door. I ran and threw on my shoes. As I did this I was handed a large box by the woman, telling me that it was a type of sweet bean treat that was popular in her area. She figured it would make a good Omiyagi for when I got back to work. This woman knew me for about 15 minutes and gave me delicious treats. Did I mention I love this place?
Our next stop was the home of Mrs. Funaki’s uncle, who was in his 80’s and lived in what is considered a traditional Japanese home. Upon entering there was only one narrow hallway that was not tatami. I took of my sneakers and entered the living room of an elderly gentleman and his wife. We all said hi and exchanged some pleasantries. At one point one at a time the Funaki’s would go and pray to a small shrine in the back room. After a little bit of looking, I was asked to see it for myself. I was not feeling brazen enough to take a snapshot of the small shrine, but I can describe it quickly. It was a large cabinet that contained ornate woodwork on the inside and had small offerings and a bell. Once one was done (or began?) praying the bell was rung. It was very interesting to say the least.
I was then offered some rice cracker snacks and shown documentation that was over 70 years old. The rice paper was thin but it was well taken care of. I could not read it but I was told it contained difficult kanji and was essentially a family tree of Mrs. Funaki’s ancestry. I felt pretty humbled over it all, even though it was a simple act. This paper existed before there was a World War 2, and it survived the times when our countries did battle, it survived a time when I would have been an enemy to those that treated me so well. Here I was in the home of this man who was in part of his lifetime likely to have been told that I was an enemy and to be reported or captured on site. It was an interesting thought, but I didn’t think it appropriate to dwell on at the time. Quickly after he secured the documentation somewhere we left for the next bit of fun.
We made headway for about a half hour, and began climbing a mountain with the powerful Alphonse. We ended up on top of a large dam, where the video I posted takes place. Though pictures don’t do it justice, the view was great, and it was a cool place to relax. We then drove through more mountains and tunnels. I started holding my breathe through them and this became the cool thing to do on the 7 other tunnels we went through. We eventually found ourselves in what I was told was the best and most remote ramen shops in all of Fukushima. It was definitely remote, since it was the only one in the town. It was also very tasty, as my taste buds could attest.
After that we were back on the road headed towards a castle. The Funaki’s would not hear of me paying for my meal though. I was informed by Ai that I should not even bother, that I was their guest. I figured it would be rude to persist, so I smiled and said thank you. I then dosed off as the sun bounced off the leaves and the scenery shot by.
I woke to find Ai asleep on my shoulder and Dai having formed his own makeshift cot with the crawlspace between the unused seats. Mr. and Mrs. Funaki were discussing something. For a while I watched mountains and trees pass, as well as kick ass Skylines and RX-7s.
After about an hour we pulled into a gravel parking lot and exited the car. I followed the family through a crowded, meandering trail between large blocks of stone and random shines. After a slight incline, I found myself facing a five story tall traditional Japanese fortification. It was pretty damn cool if I do say so myself. It was called Tsurugajo castle. I think it roughly translated into a type of bird. Mr. Funkai, Ai and I then scaled the large fortress. It was cool; the inside was a museum that told the tale of how the castle was used through the years. It also acted as a shrine to some teenage samurai who committed suicide when they thought that their castle has been taken over in the distance.
When we reached the top, Ai’s father took a few shots of Ai and me. I took a few pictures as well. It was a really good view. We then came back down. We wandered around the area a bit, and it was here I saw another white dude. It’s kind of funny, because you yourself are white, but you don’t “see” it. You just see Japanese people. All of a sudden I find myself saying, “Whoa, it’s a white guy! What is he doing here?” This lasts for a fraction of a second. They it’s like “duh, I am a cracker too, what am I getting excited about?” It’s like you form this invisible bond with the person in a way. Well sort of, I was just annoyed because I was no longer the only white dude around. Oh well.
We then began the long, traffic-filled drive back to Koga. It was a fun time. It was here that I noticed something interesting as well. Japanese families in general not only have cool technology, but know how the hell to use it. Ai’s mom was monitoring traffic, switching up songs, navigating and talking all at the same time. She was using the super dash thingy they had in their car expertly. I’m sorry, but my dad could own a car with a navigation system, CD player and TV for years and I’m sure he would only use the CD player. He would probably have tried the navigation system once or twice, then just figured fuck it. But the Funaki’s? They had that shit on lock. So yes, I feel that Japanese people are a lot more technically adaptable than the average American. Then again, I am sampling only a small portion of Japanese society, Ai’s parents who probably represent a fraction of a fraction of a fraction of a percentage point of the population, none the less I still stand by my statement.
So I continue my foolery and English fun time with Dai and Ai. We were all having fun. Dai was obsessed with some game on his sister’s phone though, it was hysterical. He was some sort of sea urchin running through a maze. He was enthralled at all times. He also had to pee every 15 minutes, which was funny too, since it offered me a chance to check out a lot of Japanese road-side food courts. Interesting places of course, with Japanese men peeing where they please and odd culinary creations being hawked from small stores.
At one point we started to discuss pop culture. If there is one thing Ai knew, it was American movie stars and singers. I mean, she could tell you who was dating who for how long and what album came out when. At least she hated Britney Speares. I think at one point though, things went slightly afoul. I don’t know how it came about, or more precisely I don’t know how I brought it into the venue, but I think I must have mentioned my favorite comedian, or good shows. Basically at some point in the conversation, Ai’s mother turned to me, cocked her head and inquisitively said, “Skeet Skeet?” I don’t think I have witnessed anything this funny up until this point. I of course lost any good karma I had accumulated through my lifetime in this moment. Through laughing and tears I told Mrs. Funaki to not repeat that again, and to never try to find out what it means. She then reiterated, “What, ah skeet skeet?” She through the “ah” in the front if it. I was done. After laughing uncontrolably for a few minutes I just tried to change gears with the conversation in general.
So that happened. Shortly after the skeet skeet incident, we stopped at a rest stop with a conveyer belt sushi line. This is where it rotates around, and you grab what you like, and the color dish signifies the cost of the sushi. If you are not familiar look it up, they are interesting. So we grabbed a few pieces off the belt and began eating. I of course avoided taking any of the more expensive sushi, and simply had some of this or that. At one point Mr. Funaki asked if there was something special I liked. I told him I really liked unagi. Unagi being of course eel. He then promptly ordered me two servings. His kindness did not stop there. He made sure I had a piece of everything, getting a feel for all they had to offer. He did not stop buying me sushi; in fact he started picking up momentum.
The apex of this sushi stuffing was reached when he placed a large serving of Toro in front of me. For those not in the know, Toro is considered by most as the king of all sushi, it is seasonally harvested fatty tuna. It is the bomb digity. I have had it once before with Tom and that whole crew at Edo in Poughkeepsie. I had planned to have it at some point here in Japan, but I did not expect to be given it. It was of course the most expensive thing on the menu. It was funny, I was bowing and saying thank you as I was eating it. The Funaki’s seemed happy with my satiation of it. Let me tell you fellow sushi consumers, it was good, real fucking good.
It dissolved in my mouth and for a moment I was transported to the Sea of Japan, white waves crashing on the stern of the SS EAT IT UP. Captain Pepper hoisted a net from the angry, unforgiving sea, his beard salted and his costume comprised of pea coat, Dockers and a white captain’s hat. He had in fact just pulled up a fresh catch, and threw it upon a wooden table setup on the aft of his fine vessel. With deft expertise and invisible speed he created sashimi cuts of this fattest of the fatty tuna he had wrestled from the ocean. He then stabbed a piece with his ancient, though trusty knife Hilda and pointed it in my direction. In a commanding voice he boomed, “Eat it ya landluber, eat it an nary ye be the same!” I followed his orders and was then assaulted by the pure rushing freshness of the sea and her children, and the universe made sense, I saw the circle of life that was its depths all at once from the sample I had been dealt from it. The old sea dog cackled a pirate laugh as a crack of lighting whitewashed the entirety of my vision.
I awoke to find the Funaki’s pleasantly smiling and exiting the booth. Did they know of my Gaijin meter? Did they in affect counter it with a super of their own, “Toro Tasty Warp?” As they approached the counter to pay I could have sworn I heard the old man cackle again, and for some reason there was seaweed in my pocket…
I once again offered to pay, but Ai shot me an almost hostile look, as if that was the dumbest thing I had ever said. I smiled and repeatedly thanked the Funaki family. My bowing is getting very good.
The rest of the way back was just a relaxing time. We were tired but in a good mood. They started popping in American music CDs and were having an impromptu karaoke session inside the car. As it turns out the Japanese ear finds my voice akin to that of the Backstreet boys’ Nick Carter. I was asked to sing this sugary band’s lyrics. Seeing as how I spend zero yen and had what I would call a life experience that day, I yielded to their request and sang as Nick Cater, no for them I was Nick Carter, and Backstreet was back, alright. I honestly exited the van in front of my apartment doing the dance from that video. I think in any other place in the world it would have been the lamest thing in the world. Not here though, here it was me at full speed awesome and the Funaki's loved it.
I shook hands with Mr. and Mrs. Funaki. I hugged Ai. I gave Dai a big high five. They smiled and waved. I ran to the top of my stairwell and waved goodbye from there too. I had of course in the process field goal kicked some of my neighbor’s pottery and destroyed it, but let us leave that detail for tomorrow’s update. I waved as the Funaki’s fell into the distance and became part of ebbing background of colorful lights that was Koga. The air was cool and the sky was clear. I tarried for a moment in front of my fourth floor apartment and took it all in. I was still having a hard time believing this was my life. Still, I had had a great night, and would have to think of a proper way to repay their kindness. I headed into my apartment, and after a fast shower I fell asleep a little after midnight.
Day 12: Mission Complete
Sorry, easily the longest update ever. You can see why it took me four days to hatch it. I am still pissed, I can't find a way to lower the res on these pics, they are 3 megs a piece, but they are good. Damn it. Someone please find me a solution.
How do I start this one up? Not really sure. Well, lets get the ball rolling that I woke up at 5:00am. I ate something. I don’t remember what; it was too early at the time. To be honest my first real memory is meeting Ai half way down the stairs. She had on a polo and regular jeans, but the seams had rainbow colors on them. She also wore Velcro dc sneakers. Shit my ass is observant. We both ran to the bottom of the stairs, where our story begins.
It is first floor of the Asahi building complex that I meet both of Ai’s parents, Mr. and Mrs. Funaki. They were the type of Japanese people that looked about 10 or 15 years younger than they actually were. Very cool people I would come to learn. I was also met with two other things that should be discussed from the outset; their mode of transportation and their demonic dog affectionately though inaccurately named Puppy.
Let us begin with the Honda Alphonse. Its name is not the Alphonse, but it’s as close as I can remember, since I can’t seem to find it on the Japanese Honda site. In either event this vehicle is at odds with most of the road worthy automobiles I have encountered here in Japan. While most cars on this Island are of the smaller sort, the Alphonse was a monstrosity. It was like a soccer mom van on steroids. I believe there is brief video available on it in my previous post. Not very intimidating on the outside I must say, but within the belly of this beast its true nature is revealed. I am pretty sure the Knicks could hold practice inside this thing. It had a row of seats just chilling, not even active in it. It had GPS and TV. It read Minidisks for Christ’s sake.
An aside for Brad if he has in fact been reading this; I know Corbo and the rest of us made fun of you both in front of you and behind your back regarding the MD format and your stubbornness (surprise!) in defending it, but take comfort in the fact that you would be in like-minded company here. Here in Japan, MD is a valid media type, not just some laughed at Betamax buddy.
So yes, this road monster was parked in front of my apartment, and it somehow didn’t eat my apartment building or intimidate it from moving on its own Tokyo-3 style. The back of super van opened to reveal another type of beast; Puppy, a Chinese Pekinese (sp?) male. This thing had an angry, unadorable face with teeth akin to rusty crack needles. It also never really shut up. You know me folks, I love dogs, and dogs love me. To this day I still think I may have encountered some sort of genetic splicer array with a dog and left the scene with some of the chromosomes. I love them. This yipping machine though, this quadruped which I will not give the honor of the moniker “dog” I did not love. It attacked me at every opportunity and peed in my general direction. It was lucky I was trying to make a good impression with its masters; else wise I may have used its body to test my field goal kicking abilities.
So a few pleasantries ensue with Ai’s family and I am then asked to enter the van and begin the journey. I met Ai’s younger brother Dai here. Yes, Dai and Ai. I love their parents. This boy was 13, but of course looked like he was 9 or 10 since once again, we are in Japan folks. His time on this trip was mostly taken up with stealing his sister’s keitai and disappearing at random during the trip. We formed a pretty solid bond off the bat by pulling pincer maneuvers on his sister to steal her phone. He’d distract, I’d take it, place it in the seat behind me. Ai would then turn to me, and Dai would then remove the keitai from the back seat. Flawless. Throughout the trip I would throw him a random “Oi, Dai, diajoubu ka?” (sp all up in that shit).
So we drove to Fukushima, to a town that Ai’s mother was born in, to pay respects to her family who has passed. That is the point of this weekend and into Tuesday; it is known as obone (or abone?) holiday, when Japanese go back home to pay respects to their ancestors. On the ride there I made some conversation with everyone in both Japanese and English. It was great; I really had a chance to see how bad my Japanese was. As it turns out I have mastered very simple conversation and can interject random simple phrases with relative ease. I can tell what people are talking about generally too. I just have trouble saying it, and keeping past/present in the whole thing correctly. Still, knowing anything impresses the Japanese and the Funaki family was no different. They were jazzed whenever I dropped a “careful!” or “how are you?” in Japanese. Gotta love them though.
So we all talked about cars and America until we arrived at our destination. Oh jeez, I forgot a somewhat personal element that affects my view on the rest of my time on this trip, quite literally. Though my contacts felt fine going in this morning, about an hour and a half into the drive my left contact became so irritated I had to relieve it of duty. So yes, I could only really see out of one eye the entire trip. I looked like Guts of Berserk fame; one eye shut and looking tall with a group of random people. I have to admit it was a bit annoying, but it all worked out. I’m just glad the other contact stayed in.
So, destination number one on this crazy day was the grave of Ai’s mother’s ancestors. It was a very sunny day, so I suppose one could say the weather was perfect. Interesting thing to note is that we did not go to a cemetery; the graves/shrines/what have you were maybe 15 or 20 together right on the side of the road through town, near the homes of where they lived. I am under the impression but not distinct knowledge that this is how it is done, creating a more personal, reflective experience. Ai’s mother exited the car and put on a black newsboy hat as she walked towards the graves. It was odd, she looked young to begin with, and the hat made her even younger looking. Together the family cleaned off the grave and made an offering and prayers. I did not really know my place in the situation, but occasionally Ai would signal for me to come closer, as if it was okay. At one point Ai and Dai began lighting incense. I did my part by doing some lighting and blocking the wind. It was simple stuff, but I at least felt somewhat helpful in doing so.
The incense was then placed into the shine and the parents said their respective prayers. It was a quick process, but it was done in a way that contained both casual and formal elements. The moment itself was formal; regarding prayers and incense, but the nature of the family is one that Dai was still playing tricks on Ai as this was going on. I liked it.
So after this we walked to some houses and met with some of Ai’s mother’s old neighbors. For the most part it was the family introducing themselves and giving a gift. This happened maybe 5 times, but the experience stuck in my mind for two of them;
I generally stayed on the outskirts of the house when the family went in, and waved from the door or in this case, started petting the dog hiding in the shade. I was then called by Ai who told me to come in. Apparently the family wanted to know who the gaijin was standing outside the door. I ripped off my shoes and hopped into the house and fast but formally as I could. Upon entering I was met with a middle aged woman and her young daughter (I presume). In the room to my left was a woman on a bed in her PJs and a man in a wheel chair with a rather smiley disposition. I’m not sure how I was introduced, at first I think they family thought I was Ai’s boyfriend. I think they ended up on agreeing that Ai had a great relationship with previous JETs and hence I was being shown around. I don‘t know, my Japanese is not that good.
What happened next was something I was kind of accustomed to now with introductions. The family figured I knew limited Japanese, asked a couple quick questions and then talked amongst each other. They of course wanted to involve me in the conversation, but I was incapable. I saw it most from the smiling man in the wheelchair who was curious about me, but knew not where to start what to say or most importantly, how to say it. We looked at one another, but didn’t know where to start. I was lucky though, I found our middle ground with a quick glance to my right.
“Ahhh, custom desktopu?” I exclaimed as I pointed to the heavily modded pc I saw in the corner.
“Ah, hia, Windows XP Professional!” he returned. We then quickly started going back and forth about RAM and CPU clock speeds. I was impressed he rigged an entire dual core machine from scratch; he thought it was cool that I had a dual processor in my laptop. It was simple stuff really, but that wasn’t the point. We talked this man and me. That was the point, that is the struggle here, and it always feels good when you overcome it. Before I knew it I was called by the Funaki’s, already out the door. I ran and threw on my shoes. As I did this I was handed a large box by the woman, telling me that it was a type of sweet bean treat that was popular in her area. She figured it would make a good Omiyagi for when I got back to work. This woman knew me for about 15 minutes and gave me delicious treats. Did I mention I love this place?
Our next stop was the home of Mrs. Funaki’s uncle, who was in his 80’s and lived in what is considered a traditional Japanese home. Upon entering there was only one narrow hallway that was not tatami. I took of my sneakers and entered the living room of an elderly gentleman and his wife. We all said hi and exchanged some pleasantries. At one point one at a time the Funaki’s would go and pray to a small shrine in the back room. After a little bit of looking, I was asked to see it for myself. I was not feeling brazen enough to take a snapshot of the small shrine, but I can describe it quickly. It was a large cabinet that contained ornate woodwork on the inside and had small offerings and a bell. Once one was done (or began?) praying the bell was rung. It was very interesting to say the least.
I was then offered some rice cracker snacks and shown documentation that was over 70 years old. The rice paper was thin but it was well taken care of. I could not read it but I was told it contained difficult kanji and was essentially a family tree of Mrs. Funaki’s ancestry. I felt pretty humbled over it all, even though it was a simple act. This paper existed before there was a World War 2, and it survived the times when our countries did battle, it survived a time when I would have been an enemy to those that treated me so well. Here I was in the home of this man who was in part of his lifetime likely to have been told that I was an enemy and to be reported or captured on site. It was an interesting thought, but I didn’t think it appropriate to dwell on at the time. Quickly after he secured the documentation somewhere we left for the next bit of fun.
We made headway for about a half hour, and began climbing a mountain with the powerful Alphonse. We ended up on top of a large dam, where the video I posted takes place. Though pictures don’t do it justice, the view was great, and it was a cool place to relax. We then drove through more mountains and tunnels. I started holding my breathe through them and this became the cool thing to do on the 7 other tunnels we went through. We eventually found ourselves in what I was told was the best and most remote ramen shops in all of Fukushima. It was definitely remote, since it was the only one in the town. It was also very tasty, as my taste buds could attest.
After that we were back on the road headed towards a castle. The Funaki’s would not hear of me paying for my meal though. I was informed by Ai that I should not even bother, that I was their guest. I figured it would be rude to persist, so I smiled and said thank you. I then dosed off as the sun bounced off the leaves and the scenery shot by.
I woke to find Ai asleep on my shoulder and Dai having formed his own makeshift cot with the crawlspace between the unused seats. Mr. and Mrs. Funaki were discussing something. For a while I watched mountains and trees pass, as well as kick ass Skylines and RX-7s.
After about an hour we pulled into a gravel parking lot and exited the car. I followed the family through a crowded, meandering trail between large blocks of stone and random shines. After a slight incline, I found myself facing a five story tall traditional Japanese fortification. It was pretty damn cool if I do say so myself. It was called Tsurugajo castle. I think it roughly translated into a type of bird. Mr. Funkai, Ai and I then scaled the large fortress. It was cool; the inside was a museum that told the tale of how the castle was used through the years. It also acted as a shrine to some teenage samurai who committed suicide when they thought that their castle has been taken over in the distance.
When we reached the top, Ai’s father took a few shots of Ai and me. I took a few pictures as well. It was a really good view. We then came back down. We wandered around the area a bit, and it was here I saw another white dude. It’s kind of funny, because you yourself are white, but you don’t “see” it. You just see Japanese people. All of a sudden I find myself saying, “Whoa, it’s a white guy! What is he doing here?” This lasts for a fraction of a second. They it’s like “duh, I am a cracker too, what am I getting excited about?” It’s like you form this invisible bond with the person in a way. Well sort of, I was just annoyed because I was no longer the only white dude around. Oh well.
We then began the long, traffic-filled drive back to Koga. It was a fun time. It was here that I noticed something interesting as well. Japanese families in general not only have cool technology, but know how the hell to use it. Ai’s mom was monitoring traffic, switching up songs, navigating and talking all at the same time. She was using the super dash thingy they had in their car expertly. I’m sorry, but my dad could own a car with a navigation system, CD player and TV for years and I’m sure he would only use the CD player. He would probably have tried the navigation system once or twice, then just figured fuck it. But the Funaki’s? They had that shit on lock. So yes, I feel that Japanese people are a lot more technically adaptable than the average American. Then again, I am sampling only a small portion of Japanese society, Ai’s parents who probably represent a fraction of a fraction of a fraction of a percentage point of the population, none the less I still stand by my statement.
So I continue my foolery and English fun time with Dai and Ai. We were all having fun. Dai was obsessed with some game on his sister’s phone though, it was hysterical. He was some sort of sea urchin running through a maze. He was enthralled at all times. He also had to pee every 15 minutes, which was funny too, since it offered me a chance to check out a lot of Japanese road-side food courts. Interesting places of course, with Japanese men peeing where they please and odd culinary creations being hawked from small stores.
At one point we started to discuss pop culture. If there is one thing Ai knew, it was American movie stars and singers. I mean, she could tell you who was dating who for how long and what album came out when. At least she hated Britney Speares. I think at one point though, things went slightly afoul. I don’t know how it came about, or more precisely I don’t know how I brought it into the venue, but I think I must have mentioned my favorite comedian, or good shows. Basically at some point in the conversation, Ai’s mother turned to me, cocked her head and inquisitively said, “Skeet Skeet?” I don’t think I have witnessed anything this funny up until this point. I of course lost any good karma I had accumulated through my lifetime in this moment. Through laughing and tears I told Mrs. Funaki to not repeat that again, and to never try to find out what it means. She then reiterated, “What, ah skeet skeet?” She through the “ah” in the front if it. I was done. After laughing uncontrolably for a few minutes I just tried to change gears with the conversation in general.
So that happened. Shortly after the skeet skeet incident, we stopped at a rest stop with a conveyer belt sushi line. This is where it rotates around, and you grab what you like, and the color dish signifies the cost of the sushi. If you are not familiar look it up, they are interesting. So we grabbed a few pieces off the belt and began eating. I of course avoided taking any of the more expensive sushi, and simply had some of this or that. At one point Mr. Funaki asked if there was something special I liked. I told him I really liked unagi. Unagi being of course eel. He then promptly ordered me two servings. His kindness did not stop there. He made sure I had a piece of everything, getting a feel for all they had to offer. He did not stop buying me sushi; in fact he started picking up momentum.
The apex of this sushi stuffing was reached when he placed a large serving of Toro in front of me. For those not in the know, Toro is considered by most as the king of all sushi, it is seasonally harvested fatty tuna. It is the bomb digity. I have had it once before with Tom and that whole crew at Edo in Poughkeepsie. I had planned to have it at some point here in Japan, but I did not expect to be given it. It was of course the most expensive thing on the menu. It was funny, I was bowing and saying thank you as I was eating it. The Funaki’s seemed happy with my satiation of it. Let me tell you fellow sushi consumers, it was good, real fucking good.
It dissolved in my mouth and for a moment I was transported to the Sea of Japan, white waves crashing on the stern of the SS EAT IT UP. Captain Pepper hoisted a net from the angry, unforgiving sea, his beard salted and his costume comprised of pea coat, Dockers and a white captain’s hat. He had in fact just pulled up a fresh catch, and threw it upon a wooden table setup on the aft of his fine vessel. With deft expertise and invisible speed he created sashimi cuts of this fattest of the fatty tuna he had wrestled from the ocean. He then stabbed a piece with his ancient, though trusty knife Hilda and pointed it in my direction. In a commanding voice he boomed, “Eat it ya landluber, eat it an nary ye be the same!” I followed his orders and was then assaulted by the pure rushing freshness of the sea and her children, and the universe made sense, I saw the circle of life that was its depths all at once from the sample I had been dealt from it. The old sea dog cackled a pirate laugh as a crack of lighting whitewashed the entirety of my vision.
I awoke to find the Funaki’s pleasantly smiling and exiting the booth. Did they know of my Gaijin meter? Did they in affect counter it with a super of their own, “Toro Tasty Warp?” As they approached the counter to pay I could have sworn I heard the old man cackle again, and for some reason there was seaweed in my pocket…
I once again offered to pay, but Ai shot me an almost hostile look, as if that was the dumbest thing I had ever said. I smiled and repeatedly thanked the Funaki family. My bowing is getting very good.
The rest of the way back was just a relaxing time. We were tired but in a good mood. They started popping in American music CDs and were having an impromptu karaoke session inside the car. As it turns out the Japanese ear finds my voice akin to that of the Backstreet boys’ Nick Carter. I was asked to sing this sugary band’s lyrics. Seeing as how I spend zero yen and had what I would call a life experience that day, I yielded to their request and sang as Nick Cater, no for them I was Nick Carter, and Backstreet was back, alright. I honestly exited the van in front of my apartment doing the dance from that video. I think in any other place in the world it would have been the lamest thing in the world. Not here though, here it was me at full speed awesome and the Funaki's loved it.
I shook hands with Mr. and Mrs. Funaki. I hugged Ai. I gave Dai a big high five. They smiled and waved. I ran to the top of my stairwell and waved goodbye from there too. I had of course in the process field goal kicked some of my neighbor’s pottery and destroyed it, but let us leave that detail for tomorrow’s update. I waved as the Funaki’s fell into the distance and became part of ebbing background of colorful lights that was Koga. The air was cool and the sky was clear. I tarried for a moment in front of my fourth floor apartment and took it all in. I was still having a hard time believing this was my life. Still, I had had a great night, and would have to think of a proper way to repay their kindness. I headed into my apartment, and after a fast shower I fell asleep a little after midnight.
Day 12: Mission Complete
Sorry, easily the longest update ever. You can see why it took me four days to hatch it. I am still pissed, I can't find a way to lower the res on these pics, they are 3 megs a piece, but they are good. Damn it. Someone please find me a solution.