(no subject)
my heart.
No apologies for my absence this time; I guess we've all grown up a little bit.
This summer I've discovered how it is supposed to be. I've listened to Ryan Adams obsessively and enjoyed waking up early. Each day is packed full of possibility and love and I am continually basking in my blessings.
Want to know something funny? I met him on Myspace and he lives literally 3 blocks away from me. Oh, small worlds. Lately, I've been trying to figure out how to describe him or at least describe why I love him. But I can't. I do want to say that GOD I AM SO FUCKING HAPPY because all these times, in all these other relationships, I thought I was the faulty one. Too clingy, too emotional, too dependent, too intense. Wrong Wrong Wrong Wrong. It is possible to meet someone who wants to call you multiple times a day and wants to see you all the time and wants to tell you how beautiful you are on a regular basis and wants to buy you dinner and will help you clean your windowless room in 95 degree heat and is gorgeous and artistic and a genius and successful and strong and unexpected and sweet and passionate and understanding. He has awakened me to pleasure. He has introduced everything love is supposed to be.
It was my birthday earlier in the month and now I am 20. Hello, 20 year old girl. In two weeks I move out of my first apartment and in to my first basement apartment in a little white house with a Judy Pfaff print and two boys and one girl and air conditioning and a full kitchen and cable tv and a driveway.
So, that's where I've been: happy and in bed. I hope you are all well and please know I am reading.