(no subject)
Sitting here, amidst people my age with whom I have nothing in common, I thought of the past. I remembered my old livejournal, the one before this and I went back to read it. How things change. Was I ever that girl? My mood swings were visible and extreme; I paraded my pop-culture obsession, my youth, my naivety. Hopefully, I'm more graceful now (but I'm beginning to think that I'm only more dull). Before I was less guarded. Now..now. Now words travel through a filter and I hesitate. Hesitate. I found traces of a certain long lost love and for fleeting seconds wish to retrieve him. Where is he? Who was he?
I was more fun back then, more secure. Not secure as in confident, I'd say I'm more mature and possess an inner strength that was absent before, but secure in my surroundings, with my place. We're in limbo now. (and I'm stuck wondering whowilllovemewhowouldlovemewhowill?)
This summer the only voice my walls will hear are my own. Silence, underneath beepshonksandmotors will greet me. I bet I'll look older when she comes back- I bet the bags under my eyes will grow. Being in my own company for too long tends to make my flesh sag.
who knows my name anymore?
I was more fun back then, more secure. Not secure as in confident, I'd say I'm more mature and possess an inner strength that was absent before, but secure in my surroundings, with my place. We're in limbo now. (and I'm stuck wondering whowilllovemewhowouldlovemewhowill?)
This summer the only voice my walls will hear are my own. Silence, underneath beepshonksandmotors will greet me. I bet I'll look older when she comes back- I bet the bags under my eyes will grow. Being in my own company for too long tends to make my flesh sag.
who knows my name anymore?