I can't understand this. [I also don't understand LJ Cuts]
Things have been going pretty well. I've got a paying job now, and I'm hoping it will be full-time, soon. Either way, I'm really happy about it.
Blind School isn't a very fun place, as many people might imagine. It's getting more frustrating as time goes by, mostly because I don't know how to avoid pissing people off. Saying it's only two more months makes me antsy, so... heh.
About twenty minutes ago, I slipped, fell, and landed on my back... needless to say, my head is not happy. Neither is my eye, but he's a grumpy eye to begin with.
Because grumpy eye has made me grumpy, I found something to incoherently rant about.
Soooo, I've got this friend. He isn't much of a friend right now, but he talks to me and doesn't take that many of my antisocial tendencies personally.
Or, maybe it's that he didn't used to. He's trying to fix me, now. His latest campaign is trying to get me laid, or at least to convince me to be open to it. I'm pretty sure he's serious about this. Of course, he hasn't made a (serious) offer to help me with what he sees as the problem...
But, when I asked him why he keeps telling me how much I should get a boyfriend and do something with them (fooling around is apparently good enough for him?), he says it's because I'm such a geek, and it's embarrassing. He also says that working retail in a comics/gaming shop is no excuse.
Maybe I'm just getting really butthurt over nothing, but I wouldn't normally take stuff like this personally. Knowing the guy, the fact that he gave me a serious answer shows that he's completely fucking serious.
And, it just puzzles the Hell out of me.
On and off for the past few years, I've had more than a few friends tell me stuff like this - sometimes jokingly, and sometimes... I just can't tell.
What I can't figure out is - what would it change? Granted, I have little-to-no experience with romance, hot/kinky sexual activities, etc. I also don't really believe in the “healing cock” theory, despite what the internet has taught me. The cock must be a magical healing one, because they seem to think that getting fucked will get me to stop being so much of a geek... or, maybe it will teach me that I need to be ashamed of my hobbies and interests?
Maybe, it'll be so good that I'll become a nymphomaniac whose only interest is... you get the idea. I really think that's what they're wanting. I know it confuses them (and bothers him, specifically) that I'd rather read a good book than do nothing but talk about sex for an hour. There are better things to do with my time! And I know it damn near offends him that I'd rather play Poke'mon than have "hawt" cybersex “Roleplay” with him, or his friends... or, yeah. I should be watching teenage soap operas with other chicks I know, instead of reading/watching the news! They get confused about that, too.
How could I not care about what's going on in SKINS right now?! There's so much drama, and so-and-so isa sexorzmaniac with what's-his-face who is dating this slut named... bleggh.
I just want to know what they think will change about me? I asked the guy mentioned in this rant, and he didn't have an answer for me. He just laughed, and went on telling me that I'd be a lot happier if I got fucked, or at least got a boyfriend who I could mess around with on a regular basis.
Because, from what I'm getting...
It'd make me a lot more social with people my own age who “have lives”...
It'd take away all the problems I have with anxiety...
And, it'd help me realize what should really matter to me.
Fuck, no. I like the friends I have right now. I like caring about the things I do.
Okay, seriously. Somebody's going to have to help me figure this one out. Does sex REALLY change a person that much, or does it just double as the key that unlocks your true self... one that everybody has inside of them, and that just needs to be sucked to the surface so that one can become a productive member of society, and a worth-while human-being?
This isn't to say I'm not human, though they think it is... I'd just rather spend my time thinking about things that don't end after an hour, and always have the exact same story, build-up, climax, and ending! =D
I'm only slightly offended, tbh. - I'm just fucking baffled on how getting fucked would "fix me" as a person.
Oh, it's one of those society things, isn't it? Geeks don't get laid, and if they did...
Am I getting close, yet?
So, yeahhh.
Awkward rant was awkward for me.
It was also originally a lot more vulgar, too. That makes me sad. Vulgarity apparently equals creativity. D=
I've got a lot of Korean music stuck in my head, and I don't like it. I also have a mini-essay on a Warhammer army to write, and I've been holding off on it wayyy too long...
Which means I'm going to get back to the Nightside book I was reading. Unlike with sex, I don't really know how it's supposed to end. =P
Next time, I'll write about something more important, I swear.
EDIT: Constant edits because I fail at spelling and LJ cuts.
Blind School isn't a very fun place, as many people might imagine. It's getting more frustrating as time goes by, mostly because I don't know how to avoid pissing people off. Saying it's only two more months makes me antsy, so... heh.
About twenty minutes ago, I slipped, fell, and landed on my back... needless to say, my head is not happy. Neither is my eye, but he's a grumpy eye to begin with.
Because grumpy eye has made me grumpy, I found something to incoherently rant about.
Soooo, I've got this friend. He isn't much of a friend right now, but he talks to me and doesn't take that many of my antisocial tendencies personally.
Or, maybe it's that he didn't used to. He's trying to fix me, now. His latest campaign is trying to get me laid, or at least to convince me to be open to it. I'm pretty sure he's serious about this. Of course, he hasn't made a (serious) offer to help me with what he sees as the problem...
But, when I asked him why he keeps telling me how much I should get a boyfriend and do something with them (fooling around is apparently good enough for him?), he says it's because I'm such a geek, and it's embarrassing. He also says that working retail in a comics/gaming shop is no excuse.
Maybe I'm just getting really butthurt over nothing, but I wouldn't normally take stuff like this personally. Knowing the guy, the fact that he gave me a serious answer shows that he's completely fucking serious.
And, it just puzzles the Hell out of me.
On and off for the past few years, I've had more than a few friends tell me stuff like this - sometimes jokingly, and sometimes... I just can't tell.
What I can't figure out is - what would it change? Granted, I have little-to-no experience with romance, hot/kinky sexual activities, etc. I also don't really believe in the “healing cock” theory, despite what the internet has taught me. The cock must be a magical healing one, because they seem to think that getting fucked will get me to stop being so much of a geek... or, maybe it will teach me that I need to be ashamed of my hobbies and interests?
Maybe, it'll be so good that I'll become a nymphomaniac whose only interest is... you get the idea. I really think that's what they're wanting. I know it confuses them (and bothers him, specifically) that I'd rather read a good book than do nothing but talk about sex for an hour. There are better things to do with my time! And I know it damn near offends him that I'd rather play Poke'mon than have "hawt" cybersex “Roleplay” with him, or his friends... or, yeah. I should be watching teenage soap operas with other chicks I know, instead of reading/watching the news! They get confused about that, too.
How could I not care about what's going on in SKINS right now?! There's so much drama, and so-and-so isa sexorzmaniac with what's-his-face who is dating this slut named... bleggh.
I just want to know what they think will change about me? I asked the guy mentioned in this rant, and he didn't have an answer for me. He just laughed, and went on telling me that I'd be a lot happier if I got fucked, or at least got a boyfriend who I could mess around with on a regular basis.
Because, from what I'm getting...
It'd make me a lot more social with people my own age who “have lives”...
It'd take away all the problems I have with anxiety...
And, it'd help me realize what should really matter to me.
Fuck, no. I like the friends I have right now. I like caring about the things I do.
Okay, seriously. Somebody's going to have to help me figure this one out. Does sex REALLY change a person that much, or does it just double as the key that unlocks your true self... one that everybody has inside of them, and that just needs to be sucked to the surface so that one can become a productive member of society, and a worth-while human-being?
This isn't to say I'm not human, though they think it is... I'd just rather spend my time thinking about things that don't end after an hour, and always have the exact same story, build-up, climax, and ending! =D
I'm only slightly offended, tbh. - I'm just fucking baffled on how getting fucked would "fix me" as a person.
Oh, it's one of those society things, isn't it? Geeks don't get laid, and if they did...
Am I getting close, yet?
So, yeahhh.
Awkward rant was awkward for me.
It was also originally a lot more vulgar, too. That makes me sad. Vulgarity apparently equals creativity. D=
I've got a lot of Korean music stuck in my head, and I don't like it. I also have a mini-essay on a Warhammer army to write, and I've been holding off on it wayyy too long...
Which means I'm going to get back to the Nightside book I was reading. Unlike with sex, I don't really know how it's supposed to end. =P
Next time, I'll write about something more important, I swear.
EDIT: Constant edits because I fail at spelling and LJ cuts.