(no subject)
Ok i havent updated in a while....so what who cares anyways
Today has been a wierd day, i've felt wierd all day, maybe because of last night...and that just set the mood for today.(which wasnt really a great one for the books by the way)
I've been busy so i couldnt think about things lately, but now that i am finally sitting down realzing,with no games , movies, outlets, friends, family,to distract....i realized something about myself...
I'm going to be a sophomore in college. even though it feels like i'm just going to start another round of school continuing the tradition i have been doing for nearly 13-14 years now...I'm afraid to grow up cause i might leave things behind, all these good things, which by the way have been so very good to me, better than in a long time and it's great, and i'm afraid that might change come September, i dont want to go back to having those feelings again of lonelyness and missing her (yes i'm talking about Celia)
I don't know why i do this to myself, not very often and it comes in little spurts but i look through all the good and glare at the bad, and wait for it to happen,i even think of the bad things that can be happening right now, even though they aren't... i do it and i dont mean too..i dont want to feel like this, i shouldnt feel like this but i do and i can't stop this random pessimistic adittude.
maybe tomorrow will bring a new light on things in Philly.....sometimes we need to get away, but running never solved anything
thanks for reading if you did read this..it helped me to read my own problems..maybe it'll help you too
Today has been a wierd day, i've felt wierd all day, maybe because of last night...and that just set the mood for today.(which wasnt really a great one for the books by the way)
I've been busy so i couldnt think about things lately, but now that i am finally sitting down realzing,with no games , movies, outlets, friends, family,to distract....i realized something about myself...
I'm going to be a sophomore in college. even though it feels like i'm just going to start another round of school continuing the tradition i have been doing for nearly 13-14 years now...I'm afraid to grow up cause i might leave things behind, all these good things, which by the way have been so very good to me, better than in a long time and it's great, and i'm afraid that might change come September, i dont want to go back to having those feelings again of lonelyness and missing her (yes i'm talking about Celia)
I don't know why i do this to myself, not very often and it comes in little spurts but i look through all the good and glare at the bad, and wait for it to happen,i even think of the bad things that can be happening right now, even though they aren't... i do it and i dont mean too..i dont want to feel like this, i shouldnt feel like this but i do and i can't stop this random pessimistic adittude.
maybe tomorrow will bring a new light on things in Philly.....sometimes we need to get away, but running never solved anything
thanks for reading if you did read this..it helped me to read my own problems..maybe it'll help you too