(Untitled)

[sexytarawitch]

Quietly I keep the fact that Angel picked out the worlds cheesiest movie. He meant well and I'm sure I can sit through it without dozing off...I might fall asleep but it's something that my body needs anyhow. He's sweet enough to want to sit with someone who looks so broken right now and just keep me company. "The cookies are good," I tell him,

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[_keep_me]

Looks like I'm not having ice cream. Somehow that doesn't surprise me. Didn't really think she wanted frivolous anyway. Maybe for a second it sounded good, but I can practically feel everything come crashing back to her. Doesn't matter to me what we do as long as I can make her feel better, make her feel safe.

"Rest," I murmur, twining my fingers gently with hers, scooting even closer to her instead of pulling her to me so I don't hurt her, and pulling the blankets around us as the movie mumbles in the background. "I'm gonna be right here. Not going anywhere," I murmur, kissing the top of her head where she fits under my chin as she leans against me.

I push my hand gently over her opposite arm, careful to not aggravate any bruising. "Tell me if I do anything that hurts you, Tar," I murmur, listening more to her heartbeat and breathing than to the movie. I wish there was more I could do, but really time is going to be the biggest factor. Time and rest. She's not leaving this bed for a day or two at the least. No, she's definitely not.

[sexytarawitch]

The movie melts into the background of the room and I put my focus on Angel and this moment. I might be bruised and broken but he makes me feel unharmed, like nothing happened. We're just...normal.

Normal is such a word that I never associated with me or my life; maybe it was time to change that. Maybe it was my time to be 'normal'. I don't have to run from demons anymore; especially those that live inside me. I'm human, flesh and bone. I'm mortal and that is by far the greatest gift anyone could have given me.

My mind is slowly running down this oddly winding road that is my train of thought but Angel's voice breaks me out of it when he whispers to me, a light touch of his arm slows my heart into a calm again and I feel okay.

It's good to feel that.

"You're not," I whisper back, tipping my head up to kiss the edge of his jaw before nuzzling my face back against his chest. "A-angel?" I nervously bite my lip before asking him a question that has been poking the back of my mind for some time now. "T-tell me about you. Anything you're c-comfortable with is okay...I was curious."

[_keep_me]

She doesn't seem quite as tense the longer we sit together, but I can't imagine that a little holding from me is going to do her that much good. She's really going to need a lot of rest. This stuff isn't going to go away on its own.

It feels good to have her respond and nuzzle closer though. Good to know she knows I'm here and she can lean on me. Or I hope she knows she can lean on me.

"Curious about what?" I ask carefully, not really sure she's ready for this conversation. "Vampire, sun allergy, liquid diet, not really that interesting. Even Cordy'll tell you that," I murmur, kissing the top of her again.

"Are you sure there's nothing else you need? Another blanket or something," I ask trying to shift the subject. "Or if you want to sleep, I can stop keeping you awake," I offer, wincing at how that must sound like I'm trying to bolt. Not that her question doesn't make me want to, but still. I'm gonna be there for her. "Or if you want a massage, I can do those too," I add trying to cover my tracks.

[sexytarawitch]

Angel's change of subject makes mine look like I'm an amature, and it's been something that I've done since the day my mother died and I put my focus back on magic.

It's okay though, I can understand why he might be uncomfortable talking about himself, that's one thing I don't like to do at all. I can't help but let my curious side poke the back of my mind; but I can let that slip for the moment. Neither one of us are in the best state of mind right now.

"So no picnic's during the day, moonlight only. I think I can remember that." I cut myself off when I start to make a joke about what blood type he prefer's but I know it's a touchy subject for him. "Cordy? Your friend." I chose to change the subjet and politely pry into knowing a bit about his friends instead. "Tell me aboutt your friends then, if you're more comfortable with that?"

I smile at him and snuggle closer to him, pulling the blankets a bit more up on us. "I don't need anything else, you're not keeping me from sleeping, Angel. I like hearing you talk and I should have known you would be uncomfortable about talking about yourself. I hate talking about myself." Sighing softly I tip my face up to him and kiss his jawline. "If you're comfortable tell me about your friends."

[_keep_me]

This is the part I'm never good at. The part with the parent meeting and the small talk. The part with, 'Oh, tell me about yourself, Angel,' the part where I avoid eye contact and start pointing out pointy objects and their history, or paintings and their backstories. It's not that I'm uncomfortable talking about myself, it's that I'm uncomfortable talking about Angelus, and...a good two-thirds of my life is his story, not mine.

What twenty-something wants to hear about the best way to fillet a man's throat so he dies slower, not faster...but still looks pleasing to the eye? And aside from that, I obviously don't know anything about movies after 1970 - because really, who wants to know anything about movies post drive-in - and music is even further down on my list. Sure, I could tell you a Brahms from Beethoven, but being old guys like myself, they're not really all the rage. But Tara wants some distraction, I'm guessing, and distraction I can do.

"Well..." I don't know if we're quite friends yet, but most of the time we're family, and, "They're kind of like you. Smart, pretty," I murmur, kissing her cheek back gently, careful of some bruises blooming. "Wes would protest being called pretty, but," I give her a teasing smile. "Cordy's from Sunnydale, kind of riches to rags story, but she still loves her shoes and she's...kinda growing into herself here," I say with a touch of pride in my voice. "Wes is...well, we're not sure what planet Wes is on when he gets into his books, but he's from Britain. A little bit awkward, but kind of a charmer in his own way," I muse. "Great shot, and he's not too bad with spells. Cordy she's the one who's the great nurse and internet researcher. Plus, you know, the charming people out of their money," I add, brushing my hand up and down Tara's arm.

"Hopefully, you'll get to meet them," I add, looking at her, wondering if my rambling is helping her at all. "That help your curiosity a little?" I murmur, leaning my cheek against her hair. She smells so nice. If not a little over bloodied, if you will. All those bruises...I can smell her better with all that blood so close to the surface. "What about your mom? Do you feel like talking about her?"

[sexytarawitch]

A gentle blush creeps up onto my face when he tells me I'm pretty, I know he means it but it's stil so new to me that someone see's me that way. Sometimes I still feel so bruised from Willow, even if it's been a while now.

"I hope to meet them too," I tell him softly, a part of me getting nervous and excited about meeting the people closest to him. I just hope they aren't the inquisitive type and want to know so much about me, I'm not a big talker. "It does a bit, but I'd like to know about you someday. We've got time."

He asks me about my mother and stories fill my mind and I'm not sure where to start or what to talk to him about that won't make me cry, I miss her all the time but sometimes more then enough to make me ache. "Mamma was my best friend, my life." I smile softly, watching as we idily play with each other's fingers. "She taught me my magic and how to embrace it, about the elements. W-we did have to keep that hidden from the rest of my family but Mamma always understood me." I shrugged a litte. "She taught me how to cook and appreciate the little things." My voice cracks a little as I continue. "I w-was fifteen when the doctor's said she was sick, she fought I know, tried to stay but it wasn't to be;" I sniffle, "I was seventeen when she died. It took me almost a year to get the courage to leave and find my life."

[_keep_me]

"A year's pretty short," I murmur, rubbing my thumb over her knuckles. "You've still got time," I murmur, taking in all that she's told me. We've all had a rough life. This girl's got the bruises to show for it. But I think she's still got time to figure out her life. If we can keep the people who did this to her away.

"The magic, did you like it? Or do you still, I mean," I ask, thinking about some covens I've heard of where the people you learn and practice magic with kind of become a part of you and it's hard to have the same energy when they're gone. I know she had her spells she was going to try to keep her family away, but she was desperate, and I wonder if she'd still use magic if she didn't have to.

"You should probably try to get some sleep. Heal," I murmur, kissing her hair again but still keeping her close. "I'll be right here," I say to reassure her. I don't want her to think that I'm going anywhere or that she's going to be abandoned and wake up alone again. Not gonna happen.

[sexytarawitch]

He seemed to soak in everything I said, which was a nice change to tell someone something and they actually wanted to listen. It's something that I can easily find myself getting used to and I think I like it.

Angel mentions magic and I feel my insides getting rumbly with worry before I speak. "It's a part of me. To me it's just something that is; it's a privlage and something that should be respected and not something to take advantage of." I sigh softly. "I haven't for a while, I didn't think it was safe enough at my apartment and I'm usually at school or at Lorne's."

My eyes close for a moment when he tells me again to rest; but this time I yawn before I speak and simply nod. I start realizing that I am feeling a bit more tired than I thought and nobody knows where this place is so I'll be okay.

"A nap might be good, sleep better too. I know you'll be here;" I murmur quietly against his chest, closing my eyes as my fingers find his. "Thank you, Angel."

[_keep_me]

Continued here.