(no subject)
It's cold and rainy. Perfect hoodie weather. Perfect stay in bed all day and be lazy type weather. But being lazy in bed all day is no fun when you're the only body consuming your entire bed. Even if your bed is only a tiny litte twin.
Love is something amazing. When all you want is to be with that person that makes you smile constantly. When they're the last person you think of before you go to sleep and the first one you reach for when you wake up. But 400 miles can leave a lot of space open for doubts and negative thoughts.
A close friend of mine often says I'm strong as hell. Because I can deal with the distance. The love I have is strong enough to get me through the many miles and several days sometimes weeks between seeing the person who holds my heart in the palm of his hands. I've never been this voulnerable. He has the ability to make me smile at my worst and laugh when I want to cry. He's proven that he genuinely cares and yet he has the power to crush my entire world at any moment. Unfortunately, negative thoughts about such activites fill my head from time to time due to the 400 miles between us and the difference in our work schedules.
My chest physically hurts because I miss him that much. Honestly, for a little while I didn't know what the pain was from. It took me a little while to admit to myself that it was because he's gone. I wish I had the funds and abilitly to drive and see him when I don't have to work. It feels somewhat unfair that he has to make all the effort to come see me... Simply because I don't have the money or a way to get there.
I've never wanted something, or felt like I needed something, as much as I wish I could spend everyday with him. I almost bypassed my vacation back home because I thought about taking that time to go to his house and see where he grew up. Instead, I've invited him to go with me. The best of both worlds and I'll be able to introduce him to the other important side of my life.
Now, saving the money to be able to actually go.. That'll be a challenge. Hopefully I'll be able to.
Love is something amazing. When all you want is to be with that person that makes you smile constantly. When they're the last person you think of before you go to sleep and the first one you reach for when you wake up. But 400 miles can leave a lot of space open for doubts and negative thoughts.
A close friend of mine often says I'm strong as hell. Because I can deal with the distance. The love I have is strong enough to get me through the many miles and several days sometimes weeks between seeing the person who holds my heart in the palm of his hands. I've never been this voulnerable. He has the ability to make me smile at my worst and laugh when I want to cry. He's proven that he genuinely cares and yet he has the power to crush my entire world at any moment. Unfortunately, negative thoughts about such activites fill my head from time to time due to the 400 miles between us and the difference in our work schedules.
My chest physically hurts because I miss him that much. Honestly, for a little while I didn't know what the pain was from. It took me a little while to admit to myself that it was because he's gone. I wish I had the funds and abilitly to drive and see him when I don't have to work. It feels somewhat unfair that he has to make all the effort to come see me... Simply because I don't have the money or a way to get there.
I've never wanted something, or felt like I needed something, as much as I wish I could spend everyday with him. I almost bypassed my vacation back home because I thought about taking that time to go to his house and see where he grew up. Instead, I've invited him to go with me. The best of both worlds and I'll be able to introduce him to the other important side of my life.
Now, saving the money to be able to actually go.. That'll be a challenge. Hopefully I'll be able to.