I Can't Do The 1,2 Step 16/16
Title: I Can't Do The 1,2 Step
Author: desperate2break
Rating: g
Pairing: Caleb Turman/Zack Merrick
Summary: Caleb's getting married to a woman. He loves her. But then he meets Zack and has to relearn the definition of love...
Warnings: Graphic language use, sexual scenes, angst, humour, fluff
Disclaimer: Own everything in the world cuz I'm the Queen of Everything. Seriously. No wait, I DO own Kate
POV: Third
Author Notes: Okay so I've been in the midst of mock exams and I haven't had to time to update very frequently; sorry about that. On the bright side, I've been feeling Inspired so I've already chalked up a sketch of my next fic! It'll probably be up sometime next week so look out for it.
Also, thank you to everyone who commented and read this fic. I never thought I'd be welcomed back to LJ with such wide open arms and every single one of you made this fic worth writing. I cherish you all. Enjoy the last chapter; it's for you.
The time is 11:51am. There are two hours and nine minutes until the ceremony.
This morning, Zack awoke at seven from a nightmare so vivid it squeezed and convulsed his heart into a squishy mess, barely beating.
He'd dreamt that Caleb was walking him to and fro a pier; the breeze was soft and calming - he could almost feel it kissing his skin...they looked out at the tranquil blue sea before them, twinkling and glittering in the sunshine.
That was it. The worst nightmare Zack could have had. He'd woken up shaking, the cold sheen of tears upon his reddened cheeks, and he could not return to sleep. He'd sat, cradling himself instead.
There is a sudden beep from his cellphone and he rushes to it, hoping against hope that it's Caleb.
Your new balance is $45.00. Your new bill will be posted online via the website...
His shoulders slump. How stupid he was.
******
'CALEB, HURRY THE FUCK UP!' John bawls. His newly cut hairdo hangs out of the window of his car and it's plain to see that he is dressed and ready. The same cannot be said for Caleb.
Alex appears first, walking excruciatingly slowly - almost as if he is stalling for Caleb. The brunnette bends down and grins mockingly at his friend. 'Well don't you look a picture.'
John rolls his eyes. 'Is douchebag ready yet? Rian's already at the venue with Nick; we need to get there soon.'
Alex shrugs and glances at his apartment building, where Caleb spent the morning. 'Bro, there are like, three hours left - chill.'
'One hour forty-five, actually. It's gonna take us half an hour to get across town, at least twenty for Mr Prima Donna to "juj" his hair and then fifteen to calm down Kate and tell her she looks beautiful enough to get her ass down the aisle. So in reality, we only have forty minutes - if we're lucky.' John's voice suddenly dips and he looks around furtively. 'Has he said anything about - y'know, Zack?'
The last word is whispered.
Alex nods quickly, though the look in his eyes tell John there's nothing to worry about. 'He...We talked - y'know - about...stuff. He says...It's over. He said he ended it and that he loves Kate and he's going to walk down that aisle no matter if we have to cart him there via wheelchair - his exact words, I kid you not.'
John nods, though it hurts him a little that his best friend feels so despondent about what's supposed to be the happiest day of his life. He decides that it can't be helped: Caleb is doing the best by all of them.
Finally the redhead appears; John sighs in relief as he sees the chirpy grin on his friend's face; he's even walking with a slight air. He looks happy.
'Ready for your prison sentence?' John asks with a smile as Caleb shuffles into the car as carefully as possible.
'As ready as I'll ever be; bring on the green mile,' Caleb replies with a beam so genuine it's as though Zack never existed.
But as he sits in the backseat, his stomach turns. Is he ready for this kind of commitment? What if Kate doesn't measure up to his expectations? What if she's been waiting until they're married to reveal some kinda weird doughnut fetish? What if - Stop it, Caleb, he scolds himself mentally. Today is your wedding. Get the fuck over it. Tonight you will go home with a wife and freak her till the morning, when you will board a plane to Morocco and have the best honeymoon ever.
He nods, humming in satisfaction. Yep, today is the best day of his life.
**********
Zack lies on the floor, on his back. His fingers reach out to stroke the wall that separates him and Caleb, though he knows Caleb is not home. Last night, after making love, he'd gone over to Alex's house, pleading last minute arrangements. Zack still doesn't know how much of that he should've believed, but he knows that when you're in love, you're blind.
The time now is 1:45pm.
The ceremony is due to begin in exactly fifteen minutes. Kate probably looks beautiful; she always looks beautiful - Caleb just doesn't realise it. He's used to her, that's why. Zack wonders if ever there will be a time when Caleb doesn't think he is beautiful any more. Because Zack is still hoping. There is still time.
********
The seats are full up in the church Caleb can see them from his position at the altar. Everyone is here, and it's unfortunate because Caleb has always had a major case of stage fright. And what's worse: he is expected to have his first married dance with Kate after the ceremony and he has two left feet. Only that's being generous because he dances like he has no feet whatsoever. Woah, wouldn't that be so cool? Imagine having no feet...You'd just be this floating body - or even better, you'd hop everywhere using the bottom of your torso. But how would you have sex? Or pee? Maybe -
'Caleb!' comes a harrassed voice, interrupting his thoughts. 'There you are!' It transpires to be Nick, looking very tall in his grey suit. He lost the battle against Kate and is begrudgingly wearing a pink tie and a pink tulip in the pocket of his jacket.
'Mmm?' Caleb responds absent-mindedly. He wants desperately to get back to his thoughts of floating torsos - if he could find a cure, he'd be a millionaire!
'I'm supposed to check on you; John said you were freaking out and he's busy trying to find our cousin Tulisa's bouquet but we think baby Agnes may have eaten it. Anyway, what's the matter?'
'I- No, it's stupid. Forget it.'
'Come on; we're due to be brothers in literally five minutes. Tell me.'
'I...' Caleb looks down at the ground and sighs. 'I...I can't do this.'
Nick's head shoots up from his gaze at his shoes and he looks startled if not completely anguished. 'What do you mean? Are you having second thoughts?'
'Nick, they're all expecting me to get up and there and....I can't...I can't dance.'
Nick looks as if he is about to collapse, then bursts out laughing. 'It's easy! Just hold her and 1,2 step...1,2 step...1,2 step.' He gives a demonstration with an invisible woman. 'See?'
'You don't understand - I can't do the 1,2 step!' Caleb shakes his head and focuses his attention on the church's backdoor. Kate is due any moment now.
The time is 1:58pm
**********
Zack, as he remains lying on the floor, is well aware now that there is no more hope left. Right now he knows that Kate has won. He is truly defeated.
The time is 2:56pm and the ceremony, if according to plan, has finished well over half an hour ago. They're probably dancing now, and drinking champagne, and making small talk about how wonderful their life together will be...
Oddly enough, Zack is not jealous. He is simply broken.
His phone vibrates and he knows not to expect a text from Caleb. It's from Jack:
am on my way. keep door open.
Yeah right, like Jack could possibly do anything to help Zack right now. It's that piece of shit's fault that Zack is in this predicament in the first place; why his heart is sagging and limp inside his chest and every movement takes too much effort than is healthy and he weighs about a million pounds.
Zack goes to open the door anyway - he may as well humour Jack; he'll need that jackass around since he's going to die alone: may as well keep him sweet so he'll check in on Zack when they're 98 to make sure he's still breathing. Or not, because single people tend to die earlier than non-single people.
As Zack reaches the door, he receives the biggest shock of his life and he is temporarily frozen. His feet are rooted to the floor and his hands are balled into fists; he may as well be a floating entity because he can feel nothing but the rapid, violent beat of his heart. He doesn't dare blink in case this beautiful mirage vanishes, and when he eventually gains consciousness he moves to the door slowly.
It's not a mirage.
He stands there, blinking for a while.
'I didn't get married.'
'I .... can see that.' Zack's voice shakes as he speaks and he doesn't know if he can hold himself up any longer. He gazes at the face of the man before him, whose cheeks are stained with tears. His shirt is half-undone, the tie is loose and the waistcoat is non existant. 'Why - why not?'
'.....Someone once told me you only get one chance at love.' His voice is trembling too, and his eyes have filled up again as he stares at Zack. His voice cracks on the last sentence: 'And...I think you're mine.'
Zack rushes forward to embrace the man, arms holding him tight in return. He shuts his eyes tightly and for once he doesn't will the world to stop spinning; he inhales the scent of his lover's hair and lets the tears come. They hug for hours it seems, eventually pulling away so that they can look at each other with glistening, wide eyes and trace each other's features as though they'd not seen each other for years. Zack leans forward cautiously and brushes his lips against the man's, kissing him softly.
He gently holds the redhead's face in his hands and manages a half-smile. 'I love you, Caleb.'
'I love you too, Zack, with all my heart. You and no one else.'
The time is 3:12pm.
Author: desperate2break
Rating: g
Pairing: Caleb Turman/Zack Merrick
Summary: Caleb's getting married to a woman. He loves her. But then he meets Zack and has to relearn the definition of love...
Warnings: Graphic language use, sexual scenes, angst, humour, fluff
Disclaimer: Own everything in the world cuz I'm the Queen of Everything. Seriously. No wait, I DO own Kate
POV: Third
Author Notes: Okay so I've been in the midst of mock exams and I haven't had to time to update very frequently; sorry about that. On the bright side, I've been feeling Inspired so I've already chalked up a sketch of my next fic! It'll probably be up sometime next week so look out for it.
Also, thank you to everyone who commented and read this fic. I never thought I'd be welcomed back to LJ with such wide open arms and every single one of you made this fic worth writing. I cherish you all. Enjoy the last chapter; it's for you.
The time is 11:51am. There are two hours and nine minutes until the ceremony.
This morning, Zack awoke at seven from a nightmare so vivid it squeezed and convulsed his heart into a squishy mess, barely beating.
He'd dreamt that Caleb was walking him to and fro a pier; the breeze was soft and calming - he could almost feel it kissing his skin...they looked out at the tranquil blue sea before them, twinkling and glittering in the sunshine.
That was it. The worst nightmare Zack could have had. He'd woken up shaking, the cold sheen of tears upon his reddened cheeks, and he could not return to sleep. He'd sat, cradling himself instead.
There is a sudden beep from his cellphone and he rushes to it, hoping against hope that it's Caleb.
Your new balance is $45.00. Your new bill will be posted online via the website...
His shoulders slump. How stupid he was.
******
'CALEB, HURRY THE FUCK UP!' John bawls. His newly cut hairdo hangs out of the window of his car and it's plain to see that he is dressed and ready. The same cannot be said for Caleb.
Alex appears first, walking excruciatingly slowly - almost as if he is stalling for Caleb. The brunnette bends down and grins mockingly at his friend. 'Well don't you look a picture.'
John rolls his eyes. 'Is douchebag ready yet? Rian's already at the venue with Nick; we need to get there soon.'
Alex shrugs and glances at his apartment building, where Caleb spent the morning. 'Bro, there are like, three hours left - chill.'
'One hour forty-five, actually. It's gonna take us half an hour to get across town, at least twenty for Mr Prima Donna to "juj" his hair and then fifteen to calm down Kate and tell her she looks beautiful enough to get her ass down the aisle. So in reality, we only have forty minutes - if we're lucky.' John's voice suddenly dips and he looks around furtively. 'Has he said anything about - y'know, Zack?'
The last word is whispered.
Alex nods quickly, though the look in his eyes tell John there's nothing to worry about. 'He...We talked - y'know - about...stuff. He says...It's over. He said he ended it and that he loves Kate and he's going to walk down that aisle no matter if we have to cart him there via wheelchair - his exact words, I kid you not.'
John nods, though it hurts him a little that his best friend feels so despondent about what's supposed to be the happiest day of his life. He decides that it can't be helped: Caleb is doing the best by all of them.
Finally the redhead appears; John sighs in relief as he sees the chirpy grin on his friend's face; he's even walking with a slight air. He looks happy.
'Ready for your prison sentence?' John asks with a smile as Caleb shuffles into the car as carefully as possible.
'As ready as I'll ever be; bring on the green mile,' Caleb replies with a beam so genuine it's as though Zack never existed.
But as he sits in the backseat, his stomach turns. Is he ready for this kind of commitment? What if Kate doesn't measure up to his expectations? What if she's been waiting until they're married to reveal some kinda weird doughnut fetish? What if - Stop it, Caleb, he scolds himself mentally. Today is your wedding. Get the fuck over it. Tonight you will go home with a wife and freak her till the morning, when you will board a plane to Morocco and have the best honeymoon ever.
He nods, humming in satisfaction. Yep, today is the best day of his life.
**********
Zack lies on the floor, on his back. His fingers reach out to stroke the wall that separates him and Caleb, though he knows Caleb is not home. Last night, after making love, he'd gone over to Alex's house, pleading last minute arrangements. Zack still doesn't know how much of that he should've believed, but he knows that when you're in love, you're blind.
The time now is 1:45pm.
The ceremony is due to begin in exactly fifteen minutes. Kate probably looks beautiful; she always looks beautiful - Caleb just doesn't realise it. He's used to her, that's why. Zack wonders if ever there will be a time when Caleb doesn't think he is beautiful any more. Because Zack is still hoping. There is still time.
********
The seats are full up in the church Caleb can see them from his position at the altar. Everyone is here, and it's unfortunate because Caleb has always had a major case of stage fright. And what's worse: he is expected to have his first married dance with Kate after the ceremony and he has two left feet. Only that's being generous because he dances like he has no feet whatsoever. Woah, wouldn't that be so cool? Imagine having no feet...You'd just be this floating body - or even better, you'd hop everywhere using the bottom of your torso. But how would you have sex? Or pee? Maybe -
'Caleb!' comes a harrassed voice, interrupting his thoughts. 'There you are!' It transpires to be Nick, looking very tall in his grey suit. He lost the battle against Kate and is begrudgingly wearing a pink tie and a pink tulip in the pocket of his jacket.
'Mmm?' Caleb responds absent-mindedly. He wants desperately to get back to his thoughts of floating torsos - if he could find a cure, he'd be a millionaire!
'I'm supposed to check on you; John said you were freaking out and he's busy trying to find our cousin Tulisa's bouquet but we think baby Agnes may have eaten it. Anyway, what's the matter?'
'I- No, it's stupid. Forget it.'
'Come on; we're due to be brothers in literally five minutes. Tell me.'
'I...' Caleb looks down at the ground and sighs. 'I...I can't do this.'
Nick's head shoots up from his gaze at his shoes and he looks startled if not completely anguished. 'What do you mean? Are you having second thoughts?'
'Nick, they're all expecting me to get up and there and....I can't...I can't dance.'
Nick looks as if he is about to collapse, then bursts out laughing. 'It's easy! Just hold her and 1,2 step...1,2 step...1,2 step.' He gives a demonstration with an invisible woman. 'See?'
'You don't understand - I can't do the 1,2 step!' Caleb shakes his head and focuses his attention on the church's backdoor. Kate is due any moment now.
The time is 1:58pm
**********
Zack, as he remains lying on the floor, is well aware now that there is no more hope left. Right now he knows that Kate has won. He is truly defeated.
The time is 2:56pm and the ceremony, if according to plan, has finished well over half an hour ago. They're probably dancing now, and drinking champagne, and making small talk about how wonderful their life together will be...
Oddly enough, Zack is not jealous. He is simply broken.
His phone vibrates and he knows not to expect a text from Caleb. It's from Jack:
am on my way. keep door open.
Yeah right, like Jack could possibly do anything to help Zack right now. It's that piece of shit's fault that Zack is in this predicament in the first place; why his heart is sagging and limp inside his chest and every movement takes too much effort than is healthy and he weighs about a million pounds.
Zack goes to open the door anyway - he may as well humour Jack; he'll need that jackass around since he's going to die alone: may as well keep him sweet so he'll check in on Zack when they're 98 to make sure he's still breathing. Or not, because single people tend to die earlier than non-single people.
As Zack reaches the door, he receives the biggest shock of his life and he is temporarily frozen. His feet are rooted to the floor and his hands are balled into fists; he may as well be a floating entity because he can feel nothing but the rapid, violent beat of his heart. He doesn't dare blink in case this beautiful mirage vanishes, and when he eventually gains consciousness he moves to the door slowly.
It's not a mirage.
He stands there, blinking for a while.
'I didn't get married.'
'I .... can see that.' Zack's voice shakes as he speaks and he doesn't know if he can hold himself up any longer. He gazes at the face of the man before him, whose cheeks are stained with tears. His shirt is half-undone, the tie is loose and the waistcoat is non existant. 'Why - why not?'
'.....Someone once told me you only get one chance at love.' His voice is trembling too, and his eyes have filled up again as he stares at Zack. His voice cracks on the last sentence: 'And...I think you're mine.'
Zack rushes forward to embrace the man, arms holding him tight in return. He shuts his eyes tightly and for once he doesn't will the world to stop spinning; he inhales the scent of his lover's hair and lets the tears come. They hug for hours it seems, eventually pulling away so that they can look at each other with glistening, wide eyes and trace each other's features as though they'd not seen each other for years. Zack leans forward cautiously and brushes his lips against the man's, kissing him softly.
He gently holds the redhead's face in his hands and manages a half-smile. 'I love you, Caleb.'
'I love you too, Zack, with all my heart. You and no one else.'
The time is 3:12pm.