Damned If I Do Ya 11/13
Title: Damned If I Do Ya
Author: desperate2break
Rating: U
Pairing: Zack Merrick/Oli Sykes
POV: Zack Merrick
Summary: Zack is a born-rich kid with nothing but time on his hands. He knows only luxury and when he wants something, he wants it now. A whole new world is revealed to him when he meets humble Oliver Sykes...
Warnings: Graphic language use, angst, slight violence
Dedications: .Everyone who lurvs Madina Lake and such
Disclaimer: I own no one and nothing. But, should anyone want to gift me with anything...
Authors notes: Guise! This is important; I'm going to be taking a little break from slashage here for a while, but I AM going to be posting quite frequently on my own journal - little Oli Sykes drabbles and stuff - so look there for fic. I'll be AWOL from this community for a bit.
Sorry.
For two days afterwards I was unable to sleep. Every time I closed my eyes I saw Oli's bloodied face and I wanted to cry again. Every time I dozed off, I dreamt Oli had died. I awoke in a cold sweat.
He hadn't died; the paramedics had come and taken him to hospital. He was diagnosed with severe internal bleeding, a broken wrist, tissue-bruising and a fractured rib. I wanted to crawl into the ground.
For two weeks, I stopped contact with Oli and his father, until the day I chose to hang around with Jack and the guys at Rian's house. Rian's front room overlooked the huge garden, where Mr Sykes was working and humming to himself absent-mindedly.
'Zack,' Alex said loftily, looking up from the PSP, 'isn't that your boyfriend's dad?'
'Yeah.' I shifted uncomfortably in my seat.
'So aren't you gonna go over and say wassup?'
'No.'
'Why not?' Rian asked. 'What if he thinks you stopped caring about Oli?'
'Then he'd be wrong,' I snapped. Then I felt guilty. 'Sorry. No, I just don't...'
'He's been avoiding Oli,' Jack supplied helpfully. 'That's why he's avoiding Oli's dad too.'
I turned to stare at him. 'And how would you know that?'
'It's obvious. I'm not dumb, I'm just high.'
'I still think you oughta talk to him,' Rian said. 'Just to clear the air or whatever. Unless the air is clear already and you'd just be polluting it...'
I stood up, having caught Mr Sykes' eye as he walked towards me. 'You're right, Rian.'
'Hi, Mr Sykes.'
'Zackery.' He looked faded somehow, and his smile didn't quite reach his eyes.
'I'm sorry, Sir. For Oli's -'
'It wasn't your fault.' There was silence.
I shuffled a little, then kicked the ground with my toe and looked back up at him. 'Sir, please...would it be okay if you didn't tell Oli that we spoke?' He waited for me to continue. 'It's just...I can't see him again. I really can't.'
'Zackery...' He exhaled slowly. 'This has nothing to do with your mother, does it?'
'No, Sir. I don't think Oli and I...are working out as I'd hoped. That's all.' Every word killed me to say. 'I'd prefer to phase it out.'
My Sykes nodded, gazing at me with something that looked like admiration in his eyes. 'Very well, Zackery. Your secret is safe with me.'
'Thank you, Sir.'
I watched him pack up his equipment, then walk slowly out through the backgate. A shaky breath escaped me.
'Don't worry,' Alex murmured, putting an arm around me.
I shook my head. 'That was so, so hard.'
'You did the right thing,' Rian confirmed.
'I know. I know I did.' I glanced over at Jack, but he was staring at the floor. Jerk.
He walked me home - the Jerk, I mean - since he had a squash game with my father. We stood at the front door and I stared at the ground. My throat closed and I could feel the familiar hot prickle in my eyes. Oh no...Not in front of Jack...
I put my hands to my face and began to sob without inhibition. Then I felt long, skinny arms around me and I cried harder.
'I don't wanna end it,' I wept miserably on his shoulder. 'I love him so much...'
'I know man,' he replied softly. 'It's safer for him though...'
I clutched him tight for a while, then let go and tried to compose myself. 'Okay. Let's go in.'
He surveyed me. 'Sure?'
I nodded. Definite.
'Zackery,' a soft voice called from the stairway.
I looked over and saw my mother. I felt my heart breaking all over again. 'Yes?'
'You were with that boy, weren't you?'
'No, Mom. I was with Jack and the guys. Jack's gone to play squash with Dad now.'
She inhaled deeply. 'Don't lie to me Zackery.' Her feet didn't make a sound as she inched closer to me. 'Where you with that boy?'
'No, Mom.'
'Were you with -'
'NO, MOM! JESUS CHRIST! HOW COULD I POSSIBLY SEE HIM WHEN YOU HAD HIM BEATEN UP -?'
Her slap resounded throughout the foyer. I held up a hand to my stinging cheek, and she began to cry.
'Oh Zackery,' she sobbed, shaking all over. She stepped closer, trying to rub my face better. 'I'm sorry - I'm so sorry...'
'Get off me,' I snapped, making for the stairs.
'Zack,' a small voice said.
'Go away, Gwen,' I replied, face-down on my bed. My face was burning oddly.
'No. I'm coming in. Come on, Matthew.'
'But Miss, he said no -'
'Shut up and follow me.'
I sat up and watched them enter, Matthew tentative, Gwen not so much. She gasped when she saw me. When she held up a finger to my face, it came away red. Guess Mom's rings must have scratched me. I deserved worse.
'I just want to be alone. Please leave me,' I begged, laying back down.
Matthew nodded silently, not one to question my orders. I felt Gwen, however, lie beside me and put her hand on the flat of my back.
'I wish she wasn't our Mom,' she said softly.
'Me too.'