Is This the End of the World? (6/?)
Title: Is This The End Of The World? (6/?)
Author: dauntlesss
Pairing: Jalex
Rating: PG-13
pov: Third
Warnings: Swearing
Summary: Something beautiful comes from something devastating….
Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I don’t own all time low, but I do own the plot and storyline! Title goes to you me at six.
A/N: I know this is short and really serious but I needed to lay some stuff down, I’m going to update again either tonight or tomorrow anyway so ya enjoy!!
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When Jack finally blinked the sleep out of his eyes, and opened them properly, he registered that he was outside, he was in his underwear and he was under a blanket with another boy, also in his underwear.
He’d never stood up so fast in his life.
Slowly the events of the night before came flooding back, but he tried to ignore them. He got some clothes out of the trunk of the car, before getting dressed quickly. But he could barely tie the laces on his dunks he was shaking so much, and eventually he succumbed to the emotions, falling backward onto the grass. He lay there for a while, with his hands over his face, taking deep breaths to try and slow his heartbeat and stop the shaking.
This couldn’t have happened. No, no, no, no, no. He felt dirty and wrong, he didn’t have sex with a guy, right? It was just a dream. Like those dreams you have that are really wrong and when you wake up you feel like you’ve been rolling in shit for 6 hours. Just a bad dream, a nightmare.
But aren’t you supposed to be scared during a nightmare? And Jack knew that fear was the last thing on his mind the previous night. His mind had been clouded by pleasure, and as much as he didn’t want to admit it, he really had enjoyed himself. But maybe he’d just enjoyed himself because of the actual act, not because of who had performed it. Yes. That was probably it, because Jack had never even kissed anyone before Alex, he wasn’t ugly, but there was something about him that drove people away. Probably the constant scowl on his face, or maybe because his favourite hobby was giving freshmen cigarette burns. Actually, it was probably the fact that everyone knew he carried various knifes around everywhere with him, and that he wasn’t afraid to use them. In their small town, Jack was the epitome of danger. He may as well have ‘look at me wrong and I’ll stab you’ tattooed on his forehead, because that’s what people seemed to think the minute they looked at him. He’d never actually committed a serious felony, but rumours are rumours, and Jack had never denied nor confirmed anything. But that had always been ok with Jack, he enjoyed being lonely, and he always knew that that’s what his life was going to be; lonesome.
Alex had changed that though, and over the past few days Jack had spent more time with another human being than he ever had before. In fact, if you added up all the time Jack had spent with kids his age in his entire life, it would probably come to a smaller amount than the time he’d spent with Alex these previous days. Sure, it had been nice at the start, a nice change, but now Jack was pining for his old life, he just wanted Alex to be gone. But did he have it in him to leave the other boy behind? He knew Alex couldn’t survive on his own. He couldn’t even kid himself into believing that. He knew that even though they hadn’t encountered any ‘freaks’ yet, they would eventually, and there was no way in hell that Alex could survive them on his own. In fact, as the thought of Alex dying entered Jack’s mind, he felt a strange tightness in his chest. He took more deep breaths to try and get rid of it, but before he knew it his eyes began to burn, so he put the heels of his hands over them to try stifle what he knew now were tears, and this time when he exhaled it came as more of a wrecked sob.
So, he cried. He cried because everything was well and truly fucked. The world they knew was gone, and they could die at any minute. Just like that, they could be gone. For the first time in his life, Jack was truly scared; he was petrified of what was going to happen. But the fact that he didn’t actually know what he was scared of just filled him with even more fear, filled him so much he felt as if he might throw up. As he lay on the grass, body convulsing with violent sobs, Jack realised something. He wasn’t just scared for himself; he was scared for Alex too. He was scared of someone else dying. He’d never felt this way before, and he knew that he couldn’t leave Alex behind, he couldn’t do that because he knew that even though he maybe didn’t like Alex in the exact way that Alex clearly liked him, he didn’t want to leave the older boy stranded, because even the thought of doing something that pathetically, selfishly horrific to him just brought another tidal wave of sobs crashing through Jack.
Was this what it felt like to care?
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