All Pretty and Petite (Twenty-Four)
Title: All Pretty And Petite
Authors:
turnthepageover
Pairing: Jalex
Rating: NC-17
POV: Jack
Summary: “Sometimes I just, I wish I was a girl, one just his type. Then we’d be perfect together, you know?”
Disclaimer: I don't own Jack, Alex, or anyone in the lovely band and crew that make up All Time Low. They all own each other. Amen.
http://turnthepageover.livejournal.com/36869.html
I scrolled through my phone, sighing. I shook my head, setting it down next to me on my bunk. I shut my eyes, running my hands through my hair.
It’s been almost two weeks. The tour has crawled by slowly, but the aching in my chest hasn’t gone down at all. Aly just disappeared. I opened my heart to her, and she lied straight to my face. I felt like one of those spiders, the kind where the girl rips the guys head off after they fuck. She got what she wanted and left me here to suffocate.
“Jack,” Alex said and I looked over, avoiding eye contact. They had the same eyes, and it stung.
“What?” I asked and he sighed.
“We have soundcheck in like half an hour,” he told me.
“Yeah, I know,” I said, looking up at my bunk ceiling. “Matt’s told me three times already.”
He nodded, not saying anything but also not moving. I could see him leaning against the bunks across from mine, looking at me as he bit his lip awkwardly.
“Jack, come to the food tent with me,” he said and I shook my head.
“Not hungry,” I said and he sighed.
“Seriously, dude, come with me. I don’t know the last time I actually saw you eat,” he said. “You have to be at least a little hungry, Jay.”
“I ate yesterday,” I said and he sighed again.
“I’m worried about you,” he told me and I shook my head.
“Don’t be,” I mumbled. “I’m fine.”
“Jack, you are not fine,” he said, standing up straight and shaking his head. “I’m serious, Jack. I’m really fucking worried about you.”
“You don’t have anything to worry about,” I said.
“Yes I do! Jack, you haven’t looked me in the eye once this entire conversation! You’re my best friend!” he exclaimed and I heard him say. “You haven’t left your bunk except to go to soundcheck or to play a show. And after the show you sign with the fans and then you just come right back in here.”
“I’m pretty sure that’s what I’m supposed to do on a tour,” I answered and he sighed, stepping forward and standing right in front of me.
“The fans even know there’s something wrong, Jack. You’re so distant with everyone. You haven’t been yourself in weeks,” he told me. “We miss you, man. We all miss you and we want our Jack back.”
I didn’t answer, looking down at the end of my bunk and avoiding Alex’s eyes.
“Look, Barakat,” Alex started, and I looked up at him, raising an eyebrow, “I’m sorry whatever you think happened with Aly happened, but you have to move on sometime. You can’t just sit in your bunk depressed.”
“Whatever, Alex,” I said, sitting up up as best I could and swinging my legs out so I could stand up. “My apologies for having a broken heart.”
“You’re not the only fucking one with a broken heart, Jack,” he said and I turned towards him, standing right in front of him.
“Oh, did the girl of your fucking dreams walk out on you the morning after you told her you loved her never to return too?” I questioned and he glared.
“No, I’ve just been friendzoned for the past fucking nine years of my life!” he said, anger bubbling up in his voice.
“Well you seem to be functioning with that,” I said, turning to walk away.
“Are you fucking serious?!” he exclaimed, slamming the bunk door shut so I couldn’t leave. “Functioning with it?! What other choice do I have, Jack?”
“Stop being friends with them? I don’t know what to tell you, Alex! I do know I need to pee, so move,” I said, but he stepped in front of me.
“Then I guess we aren’t friends anymore,” he said, crossing his arms and I furrowed my eyebrows.
“We aren’t friends because I have to pee and I don’t wanna listen to you bitch me out?” I questioned and she rolled her eyes.
“You are so fucking stupid sometimes, Jack!” he said, and I stepped back, staring him down.
“Fuck you!”
“I’m in love with you, Jack!” he yelled, and I could see his eyes grow watery.
“What?” I asked, shaking my head.
“It’s you! I am in love with you! I have been since we met! Just, fuck! Do you know how hard it’s been to keep that a secret because you are too fucking stupid to notice?! All you ever do is piss and moan about girls and all their bullshit, and I’ve sat here and listened to it the whole time! The whole time wishing that I could actually have a chance with you! That for once I could have a shot at being the one who makes you happy!” he yelled, wiping the tears from his eyes. “So just sit there and be depressed and whine about your broken heart, Jack. Mine’s been broken for about nine years, all thanks to you!”
He shook his head, opening the door again and walking out of it. I watched him walk away, confused.
“Alex!” I yelled but he didn’t turn around, just kept walking. “Alex!”
I heard the bus door slam shut and I ran my fingers through my greasy hair, shaking my head. What the fuck was that?
***
“Jack, where is Alex?” Matt demanded as I toyed with my guitar.
“I have no idea,” I answered, shrugging.
“You were the last one to talk to him. He knew what time soundcheck was,” Matt said, and I shook my head.
“Matt, I don’t know where he is. He stormed off the bus earlier and I haven’t seen him since,” I told him.
“Why did he storm off the bus?” Matt asked, raising an eyebrow. “Were you guys fighting?”
“No,” I said, shaking my head, then sighed. “Kind of. I guess you could say that.”
“Go find him, Jack, and fix whatever is going on between you too. You can’t be fighting tonight or it’ll throw off the whole fucking show,” he said, walking away towards Zack.
I shook my head, taking my guitar off and handing it to Danny.
I walked off the stage, going outside and pulling out my iphone. I dialed Alex’s number, putting it up to my ear. It went to voicemail and I shook my head.
“You missed soundcheck, Alex. Where the fuck are you? We need to talk.”
I ended the call, putting my phone back in my pocket. I continued walking on, glancing around as I went. I had no idea where Alex had gone, or where to find him. I didn’t really want to talk to him either. I had no idea what to say to my best friend who had just confessed his love to me. It was a bit of an awkward situation.
“Hey, Travis,” I said, seeing the red head sitting in front of his bus. “Have you seen, Alex?”
“I gave him a beer a little bit ago. I haven’t seen him since,” he answered and I nodded.
“Thanks,” I said, continuing to walk. I pulled my phone out again, calling him once more. I heard a phone ringing and I turned a corner, finding him sitting against the fence, overlooking a field. “So is this what you’re gonna do every time I piss you off from now on? Just run away and hide?”
“Fuck off, Jack,” he mumbled, pulling up pieces of grass. I sat next to him, but he didn’t turn to acknowledge me.
“Flyzik’s pissed you missed soundcheck,” I told him and he rolled his eyes.
“You really think I care about that right now, Jack?” he asked and I sighed.
“Look, Lex, I’m sorry,” I started and he snorted.
“Just leave me the fuck alone,” he said. “I don’t wanna talk to you.”
“I know you’re upset. I think we need to talk about this though, Alex,” I said.
“There’s nothing to talk about, Jack,” he said, shaking his head. “I’ll talk to Matt. Don’t worry about it.”
He moved to stand up and I grabbed his wrist, pulling him back down to sit next to me.
“Alex, you just told me you’re... in love with me. Fuck yes there’s something we need to talk about,” I said and he sighed.
“What does it matter if we talk, Jack? Is it really going to change anything?” he asked, looking at me and I bit my lip.
“I-I don’t know,” I told him, shaking my head.
“No, it won’t. I’m still going to be pathetically in love with you and you’re still going to consider me your best friend. It doesn’t matter if we talk,” he said, sighing and looking out over the field.
“I just, I don’t know what you want from me, Alex. You just sprung this on me, you can’t expect me to snap my fingers and fall in love with you too. I’m still in shock, and, no offense, I’m not even gay.”
He rolled his eyes. “Neither was I until I met you.”
“I’m sorry, Lex. I can’t force myself to love you.”
“Were you in love with Aly?” he asked, looking at me, face serious.
“Y-yeah, I was,” I answered.
“Then you already do,” he said before standing up and walking away.
♠ ♠ ♠I'm so so so sorry about the wait.
I've been kind of in a writing rut lately.
I either can't come up with a damn thing to write, or it all sounds like complete shit to me when I finish.
Thank you guys so much for all the comments and feedback though.
It means a lot that so many people love this story <3
Authors:
turnthepageover
Pairing: Jalex
Rating: NC-17
POV: Jack
Summary: “Sometimes I just, I wish I was a girl, one just his type. Then we’d be perfect together, you know?”
Disclaimer: I don't own Jack, Alex, or anyone in the lovely band and crew that make up All Time Low. They all own each other. Amen.
http://turnthepageover.livejournal.com/36869.html
I scrolled through my phone, sighing. I shook my head, setting it down next to me on my bunk. I shut my eyes, running my hands through my hair.
It’s been almost two weeks. The tour has crawled by slowly, but the aching in my chest hasn’t gone down at all. Aly just disappeared. I opened my heart to her, and she lied straight to my face. I felt like one of those spiders, the kind where the girl rips the guys head off after they fuck. She got what she wanted and left me here to suffocate.
“Jack,” Alex said and I looked over, avoiding eye contact. They had the same eyes, and it stung.
“What?” I asked and he sighed.
“We have soundcheck in like half an hour,” he told me.
“Yeah, I know,” I said, looking up at my bunk ceiling. “Matt’s told me three times already.”
He nodded, not saying anything but also not moving. I could see him leaning against the bunks across from mine, looking at me as he bit his lip awkwardly.
“Jack, come to the food tent with me,” he said and I shook my head.
“Not hungry,” I said and he sighed.
“Seriously, dude, come with me. I don’t know the last time I actually saw you eat,” he said. “You have to be at least a little hungry, Jay.”
“I ate yesterday,” I said and he sighed again.
“I’m worried about you,” he told me and I shook my head.
“Don’t be,” I mumbled. “I’m fine.”
“Jack, you are not fine,” he said, standing up straight and shaking his head. “I’m serious, Jack. I’m really fucking worried about you.”
“You don’t have anything to worry about,” I said.
“Yes I do! Jack, you haven’t looked me in the eye once this entire conversation! You’re my best friend!” he exclaimed and I heard him say. “You haven’t left your bunk except to go to soundcheck or to play a show. And after the show you sign with the fans and then you just come right back in here.”
“I’m pretty sure that’s what I’m supposed to do on a tour,” I answered and he sighed, stepping forward and standing right in front of me.
“The fans even know there’s something wrong, Jack. You’re so distant with everyone. You haven’t been yourself in weeks,” he told me. “We miss you, man. We all miss you and we want our Jack back.”
I didn’t answer, looking down at the end of my bunk and avoiding Alex’s eyes.
“Look, Barakat,” Alex started, and I looked up at him, raising an eyebrow, “I’m sorry whatever you think happened with Aly happened, but you have to move on sometime. You can’t just sit in your bunk depressed.”
“Whatever, Alex,” I said, sitting up up as best I could and swinging my legs out so I could stand up. “My apologies for having a broken heart.”
“You’re not the only fucking one with a broken heart, Jack,” he said and I turned towards him, standing right in front of him.
“Oh, did the girl of your fucking dreams walk out on you the morning after you told her you loved her never to return too?” I questioned and he glared.
“No, I’ve just been friendzoned for the past fucking nine years of my life!” he said, anger bubbling up in his voice.
“Well you seem to be functioning with that,” I said, turning to walk away.
“Are you fucking serious?!” he exclaimed, slamming the bunk door shut so I couldn’t leave. “Functioning with it?! What other choice do I have, Jack?”
“Stop being friends with them? I don’t know what to tell you, Alex! I do know I need to pee, so move,” I said, but he stepped in front of me.
“Then I guess we aren’t friends anymore,” he said, crossing his arms and I furrowed my eyebrows.
“We aren’t friends because I have to pee and I don’t wanna listen to you bitch me out?” I questioned and she rolled her eyes.
“You are so fucking stupid sometimes, Jack!” he said, and I stepped back, staring him down.
“Fuck you!”
“I’m in love with you, Jack!” he yelled, and I could see his eyes grow watery.
“What?” I asked, shaking my head.
“It’s you! I am in love with you! I have been since we met! Just, fuck! Do you know how hard it’s been to keep that a secret because you are too fucking stupid to notice?! All you ever do is piss and moan about girls and all their bullshit, and I’ve sat here and listened to it the whole time! The whole time wishing that I could actually have a chance with you! That for once I could have a shot at being the one who makes you happy!” he yelled, wiping the tears from his eyes. “So just sit there and be depressed and whine about your broken heart, Jack. Mine’s been broken for about nine years, all thanks to you!”
He shook his head, opening the door again and walking out of it. I watched him walk away, confused.
“Alex!” I yelled but he didn’t turn around, just kept walking. “Alex!”
I heard the bus door slam shut and I ran my fingers through my greasy hair, shaking my head. What the fuck was that?
***
“Jack, where is Alex?” Matt demanded as I toyed with my guitar.
“I have no idea,” I answered, shrugging.
“You were the last one to talk to him. He knew what time soundcheck was,” Matt said, and I shook my head.
“Matt, I don’t know where he is. He stormed off the bus earlier and I haven’t seen him since,” I told him.
“Why did he storm off the bus?” Matt asked, raising an eyebrow. “Were you guys fighting?”
“No,” I said, shaking my head, then sighed. “Kind of. I guess you could say that.”
“Go find him, Jack, and fix whatever is going on between you too. You can’t be fighting tonight or it’ll throw off the whole fucking show,” he said, walking away towards Zack.
I shook my head, taking my guitar off and handing it to Danny.
I walked off the stage, going outside and pulling out my iphone. I dialed Alex’s number, putting it up to my ear. It went to voicemail and I shook my head.
“You missed soundcheck, Alex. Where the fuck are you? We need to talk.”
I ended the call, putting my phone back in my pocket. I continued walking on, glancing around as I went. I had no idea where Alex had gone, or where to find him. I didn’t really want to talk to him either. I had no idea what to say to my best friend who had just confessed his love to me. It was a bit of an awkward situation.
“Hey, Travis,” I said, seeing the red head sitting in front of his bus. “Have you seen, Alex?”
“I gave him a beer a little bit ago. I haven’t seen him since,” he answered and I nodded.
“Thanks,” I said, continuing to walk. I pulled my phone out again, calling him once more. I heard a phone ringing and I turned a corner, finding him sitting against the fence, overlooking a field. “So is this what you’re gonna do every time I piss you off from now on? Just run away and hide?”
“Fuck off, Jack,” he mumbled, pulling up pieces of grass. I sat next to him, but he didn’t turn to acknowledge me.
“Flyzik’s pissed you missed soundcheck,” I told him and he rolled his eyes.
“You really think I care about that right now, Jack?” he asked and I sighed.
“Look, Lex, I’m sorry,” I started and he snorted.
“Just leave me the fuck alone,” he said. “I don’t wanna talk to you.”
“I know you’re upset. I think we need to talk about this though, Alex,” I said.
“There’s nothing to talk about, Jack,” he said, shaking his head. “I’ll talk to Matt. Don’t worry about it.”
He moved to stand up and I grabbed his wrist, pulling him back down to sit next to me.
“Alex, you just told me you’re... in love with me. Fuck yes there’s something we need to talk about,” I said and he sighed.
“What does it matter if we talk, Jack? Is it really going to change anything?” he asked, looking at me and I bit my lip.
“I-I don’t know,” I told him, shaking my head.
“No, it won’t. I’m still going to be pathetically in love with you and you’re still going to consider me your best friend. It doesn’t matter if we talk,” he said, sighing and looking out over the field.
“I just, I don’t know what you want from me, Alex. You just sprung this on me, you can’t expect me to snap my fingers and fall in love with you too. I’m still in shock, and, no offense, I’m not even gay.”
He rolled his eyes. “Neither was I until I met you.”
“I’m sorry, Lex. I can’t force myself to love you.”
“Were you in love with Aly?” he asked, looking at me, face serious.
“Y-yeah, I was,” I answered.
“Then you already do,” he said before standing up and walking away.
♠ ♠ ♠I'm so so so sorry about the wait.
I've been kind of in a writing rut lately.
I either can't come up with a damn thing to write, or it all sounds like complete shit to me when I finish.
Thank you guys so much for all the comments and feedback though.
It means a lot that so many people love this story <3