A Promise of Forever [1/2?]
Title: A Promise of Forever
Author: Chris; alltime_panic
Rating: PG-13
Paring: Jalex
POV: 3rd, Alex
Summary: That was then; this is now.
Disclaimer: If I owned this and it happened I would be a lot happier. Um, cut goes to S.E. Hinton.
A/N: I'm in a slump. So, I decided to post this. I can't write anything depressing for the life of me, but I wrote this a little bit ago and I decided to post it. It'll probably be two parts, unless people want it longer? Let me know.
P.S.: Anyone read the book the summary/cut comes form? Okay this was irrelevant bye.
Alex stared. He watched as the waves crashed on to the shore, leaving a slight residue of foam as they drew back, to repeat their rhythmic motion.
Over and over and over again.
Alex felt as if he could relate to the ocean. It sounds insane to some, but Alex was right-brained. His thoughts different from the others, he wasn't one to stay in the norm. Although, he felt so normal. The ocean was such a calm, boring blue; he's such a mellow, boring person. His life was too repetitional for his liking. Days repeated as if they're all he's ever come to known. Nothing was ever new, out of the blue. Everything has an agenda, as if the events in his day were scheduled to always play out the same way with every sunrise.
It all started when he left, the dilemmas hit him like a ton of bricks. Problems introduced themselves as blunt as it gets, sticking to his side like that one 'friend' who follows you around like a lost puppy, wanting and craving your attention when you simply want it to fuck off.
His best friend just left one day. Alex walked outside of his room, which had become their room, speaking the younger didn't like to sleep alone, and padded into the living room/kitchen of their apartment.
He'd try calling for his roommate, his best friend, the man whom he was in love with, and had gotten no response.
Alex huffed, walking towards the fridge in hopes of finding some alcohol, but stopped when he came to a note taped to the door.
"Lex,
I couldn't say this to your face. Pathetic, I know, but let's face it- you've always been more confident than me. Anyways, I'm gone. Look around you, I'm really gone. I've packed my stuff and left. College isn't where I belong, let's face it. If you hadn't walked me through every step leading up until now I would have had to drop out. Point is, I'll come back. I promise, this isn't a goodbye. It's until we meet again.
I love you. Now and forever.
-Jack"
That was then. This is now.
It was sunset, Alex came out here every night at sunset. From the first day of college, when he'd met Jack, he'd sit and watch the sunset. Jack never accompanied him, he knew the light haired boy preferred to be alone. He learned that on the first night, Alex invited him to come down to be polite, but Jack could tell Alex was too lost in thought to even remember who was sitting beside him. So he decided to let the older go by himself after that.
And Alex should have known something was up. The day before Jack left, he'd gone with Alex to watch the ocean. Dolphins had shown up that night, which was a rarity. They seldom came out any time other than the peak of morning, but Alex noticed the smile that grew on Jack's face when they swam close to shore. Jack had always been amused by the smallest of things, he was always so grateful of what he'd had.
And then Jack reached for his hand, he twined their fingers together and rested them on the sand. He waited a few moments, but Alex never drew his hand back. He waited a few minutes, and Alex never drew his hand back. They were never ones to be affectionate. They hadn't shared much more than a hug. So he made his move.
He placed his hand on Alex's cheek, turning it so he was facing him. He moved in, and in one swift motion his lips were against the other boy's, wasting no time in full- on making out with him.
Alex never had the time to finish watching the sun go down, the sky being manipulated by total darkness, because they were stumbling back to their dorm, tongues down their throats, tripping over their own feet and anything else that had been in their path. And he didn't regret missing the stars that night. It's not like they wouldn't be there tomorrow.
That was the first night they'd ever, you know, gotten it on. It was passionate and lustful all at the same time, it said the things neither one of them ever had the guts to, but they sure as hell meant it. Alex had gone to sleep with a smile on his face that night, Jack's naked body pressed up against him, holding him, pulling him as close as he could with his face in his hair and Alex's face in his neck.
After reading that note he'd turned around to see a cup of his favourite coffee already made, steaming hot. He'd just missed Jack, by seconds it seemed. As if Jack had waited for Alex to wake up before he finally left. He'd gotten to the bottom of the cup when something hit his teeth. Then he noticed the silver band with Jalex carved inside.
And he wakes up to some fucking note saying Jack's gone, and some ring? Alex knew he wasn't used, he knew it meant just as much to Jack as it did to him. Alex had never been certain if Jack planned on leaving, or if their emotions had scared him off. It never really mattered to him, all he knew is that Jack was gone. With a promise of returning.
He had never washed his sheets. Yeah, they still had Jack's cum dried on it, but that's even more of a reason for Alex to want to keep it. Their sex was unprotected, because they had nothing to protect from each other. That was their way of completely giving themselves to each other. And Alex wanted every last piece of evidence so one day he wouldn't wake up and question if it ever happened. If Jalex ever existed.
After that, all he had left of Jack was that note, the ring, and a hoodie he had left by accident. Which leads to right now, as Alex sits on the sand watching the waves roll in, licking his toes, and roll back out again.
Alex never moved out, he kept the apartment. He did drop out of college, though. What was the point? He didn't need a life without Jack. He had no life without Jack, so he wasn't going to sit around pretending as if there was one.
Today marks the second year anniversary of Jack's absence. They would have been graduating this year.
He's sit with the ring on his finger as always and is dressed in Jack's hoodie. It's black and smells of him- Dolce & Gabbana cologne. Another thing Alex has never washed, he never wanted to wash it, and never plans on it. He doesn't feel as if it were his to wash. He only wares it on the anniversaries of the day he left, anyways.
Sometimes he pretends Jack left it on purpose.
Alex snaps out of his miserable thoughts, even though it's nice to reminisce, it does bring him down when he gets too into it. He felt a presence next to him. No one ever comes down to the beach at this time.
And Alex thought there must have been a breeze, because the Dolce & Gabbana had gotten that much stronger.
Though, he doesn't bother looking up, he doesn't mind if someone wanted to sit by him. If they wanted to talk, they could start a conversation. The sun would shy away in ten minutes, he could last that long.
He looks out towards the sky. The sun reflects off the ocean, causing the sea to turn impossible colours of pinks and oranges. One of the perks of Jack leaving Alex while attending Univeriaty of Hawaii, is the promise of his return forced Alex to stay in Maui, meaning the night air is always warm, the ocean was of a nice temperature and the sunsets were impeccable. The way the colours all blended together in the sky never failed to make the corners of his mouth twitch up and bring the sparkle back in his eye. The sparkle that left two years ago.
He places his hands next to him, feeling the sand tickle his skin as it adjusts to it's new location. Then he feels fingers slip underneath his.
"I told you I'd come back."
Part Two
Author: Chris; alltime_panic
Rating: PG-13
Paring: Jalex
POV: 3rd, Alex
Summary: That was then; this is now.
Disclaimer: If I owned this and it happened I would be a lot happier. Um, cut goes to S.E. Hinton.
A/N: I'm in a slump. So, I decided to post this. I can't write anything depressing for the life of me, but I wrote this a little bit ago and I decided to post it. It'll probably be two parts, unless people want it longer? Let me know.
P.S.: Anyone read the book the summary/cut comes form? Okay this was irrelevant bye.
Alex stared. He watched as the waves crashed on to the shore, leaving a slight residue of foam as they drew back, to repeat their rhythmic motion.
Over and over and over again.
Alex felt as if he could relate to the ocean. It sounds insane to some, but Alex was right-brained. His thoughts different from the others, he wasn't one to stay in the norm. Although, he felt so normal. The ocean was such a calm, boring blue; he's such a mellow, boring person. His life was too repetitional for his liking. Days repeated as if they're all he's ever come to known. Nothing was ever new, out of the blue. Everything has an agenda, as if the events in his day were scheduled to always play out the same way with every sunrise.
It all started when he left, the dilemmas hit him like a ton of bricks. Problems introduced themselves as blunt as it gets, sticking to his side like that one 'friend' who follows you around like a lost puppy, wanting and craving your attention when you simply want it to fuck off.
His best friend just left one day. Alex walked outside of his room, which had become their room, speaking the younger didn't like to sleep alone, and padded into the living room/kitchen of their apartment.
He'd try calling for his roommate, his best friend, the man whom he was in love with, and had gotten no response.
Alex huffed, walking towards the fridge in hopes of finding some alcohol, but stopped when he came to a note taped to the door.
"Lex,
I couldn't say this to your face. Pathetic, I know, but let's face it- you've always been more confident than me. Anyways, I'm gone. Look around you, I'm really gone. I've packed my stuff and left. College isn't where I belong, let's face it. If you hadn't walked me through every step leading up until now I would have had to drop out. Point is, I'll come back. I promise, this isn't a goodbye. It's until we meet again.
I love you. Now and forever.
-Jack"
That was then. This is now.
It was sunset, Alex came out here every night at sunset. From the first day of college, when he'd met Jack, he'd sit and watch the sunset. Jack never accompanied him, he knew the light haired boy preferred to be alone. He learned that on the first night, Alex invited him to come down to be polite, but Jack could tell Alex was too lost in thought to even remember who was sitting beside him. So he decided to let the older go by himself after that.
And Alex should have known something was up. The day before Jack left, he'd gone with Alex to watch the ocean. Dolphins had shown up that night, which was a rarity. They seldom came out any time other than the peak of morning, but Alex noticed the smile that grew on Jack's face when they swam close to shore. Jack had always been amused by the smallest of things, he was always so grateful of what he'd had.
And then Jack reached for his hand, he twined their fingers together and rested them on the sand. He waited a few moments, but Alex never drew his hand back. He waited a few minutes, and Alex never drew his hand back. They were never ones to be affectionate. They hadn't shared much more than a hug. So he made his move.
He placed his hand on Alex's cheek, turning it so he was facing him. He moved in, and in one swift motion his lips were against the other boy's, wasting no time in full- on making out with him.
Alex never had the time to finish watching the sun go down, the sky being manipulated by total darkness, because they were stumbling back to their dorm, tongues down their throats, tripping over their own feet and anything else that had been in their path. And he didn't regret missing the stars that night. It's not like they wouldn't be there tomorrow.
That was the first night they'd ever, you know, gotten it on. It was passionate and lustful all at the same time, it said the things neither one of them ever had the guts to, but they sure as hell meant it. Alex had gone to sleep with a smile on his face that night, Jack's naked body pressed up against him, holding him, pulling him as close as he could with his face in his hair and Alex's face in his neck.
After reading that note he'd turned around to see a cup of his favourite coffee already made, steaming hot. He'd just missed Jack, by seconds it seemed. As if Jack had waited for Alex to wake up before he finally left. He'd gotten to the bottom of the cup when something hit his teeth. Then he noticed the silver band with Jalex carved inside.
And he wakes up to some fucking note saying Jack's gone, and some ring? Alex knew he wasn't used, he knew it meant just as much to Jack as it did to him. Alex had never been certain if Jack planned on leaving, or if their emotions had scared him off. It never really mattered to him, all he knew is that Jack was gone. With a promise of returning.
He had never washed his sheets. Yeah, they still had Jack's cum dried on it, but that's even more of a reason for Alex to want to keep it. Their sex was unprotected, because they had nothing to protect from each other. That was their way of completely giving themselves to each other. And Alex wanted every last piece of evidence so one day he wouldn't wake up and question if it ever happened. If Jalex ever existed.
After that, all he had left of Jack was that note, the ring, and a hoodie he had left by accident. Which leads to right now, as Alex sits on the sand watching the waves roll in, licking his toes, and roll back out again.
Alex never moved out, he kept the apartment. He did drop out of college, though. What was the point? He didn't need a life without Jack. He had no life without Jack, so he wasn't going to sit around pretending as if there was one.
Today marks the second year anniversary of Jack's absence. They would have been graduating this year.
He's sit with the ring on his finger as always and is dressed in Jack's hoodie. It's black and smells of him- Dolce & Gabbana cologne. Another thing Alex has never washed, he never wanted to wash it, and never plans on it. He doesn't feel as if it were his to wash. He only wares it on the anniversaries of the day he left, anyways.
Sometimes he pretends Jack left it on purpose.
Alex snaps out of his miserable thoughts, even though it's nice to reminisce, it does bring him down when he gets too into it. He felt a presence next to him. No one ever comes down to the beach at this time.
And Alex thought there must have been a breeze, because the Dolce & Gabbana had gotten that much stronger.
Though, he doesn't bother looking up, he doesn't mind if someone wanted to sit by him. If they wanted to talk, they could start a conversation. The sun would shy away in ten minutes, he could last that long.
He looks out towards the sky. The sun reflects off the ocean, causing the sea to turn impossible colours of pinks and oranges. One of the perks of Jack leaving Alex while attending Univeriaty of Hawaii, is the promise of his return forced Alex to stay in Maui, meaning the night air is always warm, the ocean was of a nice temperature and the sunsets were impeccable. The way the colours all blended together in the sky never failed to make the corners of his mouth twitch up and bring the sparkle back in his eye. The sparkle that left two years ago.
He places his hands next to him, feeling the sand tickle his skin as it adjusts to it's new location. Then he feels fingers slip underneath his.
"I told you I'd come back."
Part Two