Twelve - Legacy of Gold

[allnaturalseed]

[Like Athrun, Cagalli was taken to the infirmary upon her return - a secure infirmary, at least until someone decided that she was no longer a threat. Unlike Athrun, she has no visible wounds, though she was unconscious when she was removed from the cockpit of the Akatsuki

Comments

[seedwlives2spar]

It feels different doesn't it?

[allnaturalseed]

...Kira... I...

[She closes her eyes.]

I've never... felt so powerful, yet so... utterly incapable at the same time...

[seedwlives2spar]

I understand, how do you think I felt at Heliopolis? I wanted desperately to protect my home, and in the end, I destroyed it.

You remember, you were there.

[allnaturalseed]

[Cagalli flinches.]

...but... you weren't... you didn't have an entire nation looking up to you, expecting you to save them! How can you... it's not the same...

[seedwlives2spar]

Isn't it? What difference does it make what others expect of you?

I am the so called "ultimate coordinator" remember? I may not have known it, but I had a lot of people expecting a lot from me.

And even if I had known, what would that have changed? You have to accept that you did nothing wrong. You might have made a few mistakes, but you did nothing wrong.

[allnaturalseed]

[She puts her hand to her head.]

And if... if more people died because of me? If I really did let Djibril get away?

[seedwlives2spar]

Think more clearly about the situation. You had a four front battle, before you even intervened. Djibril escaped on an Orb shuttle, that means, as much as its scary to say this, that he had Orb insider help.

Given this fact, do you think it was possible for anyone without Orb insider information to possibly catch him?

If anything, everyone should have listened to you, left and let you do your job. Maybe then people could claim you let him get away. In that situation? It's a stroke of luck we even noticed him leave.

I'm not going to say you couldn't have done better. I sent the Destiny there because I know you and I know the GDF. I know neither of you would give in. But I also know Shinn. I know that he would do everything in his power to save you.

[allnaturalseed]

...I... it's true that he had the Seirans in the palm of his hand... if only I'd been a little faster...

But even so... you're right. I can't blame myself for what everyone else did, I guess...

So why did you... why did you send Destiny to Shinn instead of coming yourself?

[seedwlives2spar]

And what? Attack you in the Destiny? Tell you you're wrong? Be the big older brother who makes everything better?

I'm not sure me being there would have helped anything.

[allnaturalseed]

...you can't be the one to help me every time.

And I thought we went over this, I'm the older one.

[seedwlives2spar]

Exactly. You needed to be the older sister who fought for her country, even if she lost, not the younger sister who gets saved by her older brother.

Didn't you? I think for the first time ever, your resolve was challenged when you had no one else to turn to. You had two choices, give up or fight. Choosing to fight, especially against your friends, is courageous. It's the sort of choice you have to be willing to make as a leader, even if you hate doing it.

[allnaturalseed]

So I... wasn't completely wrong then.

I don't think I could've handled it if I'd actually killed Shinn though, so maybe I have a ways to go.

[seedwlives2spar]

Maybe, but what's so special about that?

[allnaturalseed]

I suppose you've got a few things you could improve on.

[seedwlives2spar]

I should hope so. I'd hate to think I'm an example of perfection.

[allnaturalseed]

In spite of science's best efforts.