The end of the beginning
“This is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning.”
I felt the rain coming down hard and heavy on my shoulders. My hair was being drenched from the rain. I stood there. A bouquet of white roses that were from the top of his casket in my hand. I stared down at the hole in the ground and the small, black casket being lowered into it. He was in there. He was dead. It was my entire fault. If I hadn't of left him alone. If I wouldn't of been such an
idiot. If I would of been there. If I was....none of this would have happened.
"HYUNG!~" Ryeowook sang in his sing, song voice. He skipped over to me and smiled a big grin. "You look tired. Have you ate yet? What do
you want me to cook for you? Do you wan-" I stopped him mid sentence. "Some ramen would be just fine." I said while smiling down at him. He
smiled up at me "Ok....but are you sure that's it? I can fix you more if you want it....." He said concerned. "No thanks. I'm not that hungry.
Just ramen will do." I patted him on the head. He nodded then headed towards the kitchen. I headed towards my room and closed the door
behind me. I threw myself onto the bed. 'Ah, I'm so tired......I'll sleep for just a few minutes.'
When I started to wake up slightly I felt fingers running through my hair. It felt calming and relaxing. To help me fall asleep my mom would run her fingers through my hair and sing to me 'Am I still asleep?' I thought. No, I couldn't be. This felt too real to be a dream. I groaned and started to lean up. When I opened my eyes to see who was there......they were gone. I looked at my door to see it closed. The door was closed when I went to sleep....and if it was someone else I would of heard them close the door. 'Weird.' I thought. I was really tired. Maybe I had just been imagining things.
Ever since the debut of Super Junior all the fan girls have really seemed to love and support the "Yewook" pairing. So we both talked about it and decided we would do more fan service. Today we were going to perform "Sorry, Sorry" live and Sungmin has been really sick. So I was taking over his part. Ryeowook and I decided we were going to do some fan service then. When it got to Sungmin's part I walked forward and grabbed onto Ryeowook's arm just normally like Sungmin did. But when he walked past me to sing his next part I stepped up behind him and wrapped my arms tightly around his waist pulling him against me. My lips almost touching his ear. Then when I began to sing the next part I stepped out from behind him and held the microphone in my left hand making it easier for him to walk past me and slide his hand across my chest. The girls began screaming like mad. We both blushed.
The next week K.R.Y. was going to be on Sukira. We sang a few of our old songs. Then we sang my favorite one. The one Yoo Young Jin had written for us.
"Sorry, Sorry Answer" It was so sweet. It was my favorite song of ours. It was my favorite out of all the Super Junior songs actually. But before singing
my chair broke. Ryeowook got up and said "Sit down." I did as he said. Then he sat on my lap. It felt like one of those little teddy bears on my lap. This kid
.....when we got home I was going to make him eat something. It's starting to worry me a bit. The fan girls watching this screamed and smiled. We began singing. When Ryeowook sang...he was beautiful. I mean....he put all effort into it...and it showed on his face.....and to me that's what made him beautiful while he
sang. Seeing him sing.....made me want to kiss him. 'Whoa. Did I just.........say that?' Yesung mentally smacked himself. 'Get yourself together man....Ryeowook is not gay and neither are you.' But as much as Yesung tried to deny that he wasn't guy and that he didn't like Ryeowook....it always failed. If Ryeowook didn't stop looking so beautiful when he sang or so nice and cute when they were at the apartment....who knows what Yesung would do to him.
Ryeowook and I decided to head home. Kyuhyun stayed for the whole show. But Ryeowook and I were both tired and we had really long schedules the next day. We exited out the back door to avoid paparazzi and crazy fan girls. Right after exiting the door I was slammed up against the wall. I felt lips warm and hard against mine. Kissing me with force and passion. I kissed back twice as hard and flipped our positions pushing Ryeowook up against the wall. We kissed till we ran out of breath. I pulled away from him gasping for air. I rested my forehead against his squeezing him arms tightly. "I guess.............you feel the same way I do don't you?" He said still trying to regain his breath. I tried my best to say "Yes." but it came out mumbled and hard to understand.......but he knew what I meant. "Good.........because I’ve felt this way since a year after I got to know you...........and I like you just as much now as I did then." I laughed. "Same here." I leaned up and pressed one last soft kiss against his lips.
Ryeowook and I have been dating now for 2 years. We've been crazy each other about each other ever since that night onwards. We're always together.
We're never apart. No matter what. But one day.....Ryeowook wouldn't answer my calls. I didn't know where he was at. He was supposed to meet up with me
for lunch after our schedules. But........I waited and waited.........and he never showed. I began to become panicky and left the restaurant running all
over Seoul to try and find him. With no luck I called the Super Junior apartment. Someone answered. "Hello?" he said. "RYEOWOOK!?" I asked shocked. "Yesung!
I'm so sorry I was late I had ran into an old friend of mine and I chatted with him and he asked me to come have lunch with him and I insisted that I was already
busy and he wouldn't stop begging me. I'm so sorry!" "...........Wait.................him?" "Yes......him." He hesitated while saying that. I was infuriated now. "........Who the HELL is him!? And why didn't you answer my calls!? Do you know how freaking worried I was!? I've been running all over Seoul for the past 2 hours looking for you. Why didn't you answer when I called you!?!?" "Yesung.....I '-" "We'll discuss this when I get home." And with that I slammed my phone shut and got in my car and drove back to the suju apartment.
When I got home I opened the door to find a worried looking Ryeowook sitting there on the couch playing with his fingers glancing nervously at them. I
closed the door and he heard it and looked at me. Fear in his eyes. He got up "Yesung! I'm sorry!" I glared at him. "You were out with another man for lunch?
Do I know this guy?" Ryeowook looked down and shook his head. "........How do you know him?" "He was an old boyfriend........." Yesung was pissed. "SO YOU ATE
WITH HIM AND DIDN'T EVEN BOTHER ANSWERING MY CALLS!?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!" Then Yesung did nothing he expected to do. He struck Ryeowook across the face. He smacked him so hard that it sent Ryeowook flying to the ground. He laid there holding his face. Yesung had a look of utter shock. He couldn't believe he just.......and of all people it was him. Yesung bent down to hold Ryeowook. "I didn't mean to..........I was just...." But before he touched Ryeowook he had already gotten up and flew out the door. He didn't chase after him. He knew it would only make things worse. Holding his head in his hands.
Hours were starting to pass now. Yesung was starting to get really worried again. So for the second time he went out looking for Ryeowook. He walked up
and down the streets when he received a phone call. "Hello?" he said answering the phone. "Well hey there yesungieeee." Oh no. He knew who that was. That
was the kid who had also been considered as the head singer of Super Junior when they were trainees. That guy was great......but due to Yesung's "Huskier
sounding voice" he lost to Yesung for that spot. He told Yesung he was going to get him back someday. That he was going to take away what he wanted and loved
the most. Just as he had taken that spot from him.
"Poor little wookie............so small and defenseless........he's really quite a beautiful boy." Yesung heard a "Get your nasty hands off of me." and knew instantly it was Ryeowook. The guy chuckled and you could hear a sharp,
pained scream coming from the other end of the phone. Yesung's eyes grew wide "Where is he?" Yesung hissed. More pained screams came high
pitched out of the phone. He couldn't move. He was frozen solid by fear. He could hear the guy teasing him on the other end. "Awh poor little wookie....no one's here to save you......shouldn't Yesung be with you? He's such a terrible boyfriend isn't he?" "DON'T TALK ABOUT HIM THAT WAY!!!!!" He heard Ryeowook yell. He soon heard a coughing noise and a strangled sounding scream come from the other side. He could hear the knife stabbing Ryeowook. "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING TO HIM!?!?" Yesung screamed into the phone. "If you want him to live..........come to the old alley behind the old practice building now......and if I was you..........I would hurry..........He only has
a few minutes left."
The practice room was only a few blocks away. Yesung could make it in time if he ran nonstop the whole way there. Yesung took off tearing past the
people on the crowded street. He turned a corner and ran into the alleyway. He could see a body laying there. "RYEOWOOK!?" He screamed running to him.
He slid next to him and examined his body. There was stab wound after stab wound in his stomach. Some on his arms and legs. Blood pouring nonstop from the wounds. Bruises covering his body. He was laying in a pool of his own blood. He was barely alive. He was hanging by a thread. It's a miracle that he's still alive. He had blood dripping from his mouth. "Yesung...." He whispered gently he attempted to reach up and touch my cheek. His voice was hoarse and barely audible. "Don't talk." Yesung said. Tears streaming down his cheek. He took his jacked off and wrapped it tightly around Ryeowook trying to stop some of the bleeding. He groaned in pain. “You’ll be okay soon.” Yeusng’s voice was pleading. He was trying to convince himself more than he was trying to convince Ryeowook. He picked him up and ran to the hospital.
All he could do now is hope that he would be okay. That he would have the chance to live. That he and Yesung would be able to sing, laugh, talk, and grow
old together. He wanted that. That was his dream. But right now that dream would be a miracle. Yesung paced around the waiting room. He wanted to know how his
condition was. How long he had to live. How long they wo- at that moment a doctor came out of the double doors that had Ryeowook somewhere behind it. "How is he?" I asked hesitantly. "He's..........it's an absolute miracle that he's alive............the people who attacked him wanted him to die a slow death.........they purposely missed all the vital organs to make sure that he wouldn't die from having one of them struck.........they wanted him to slowly bleed to death............ but.......he's lost a lot of blood.........it's a miracle that he's alive right now." "M-May I see him now?" Yesung asked. "Yes....but he needs his rest so please don't wake him." Yesung nodded and and walked into Ryeowook's room. He saw him laying there with an oxygen mask to his face. Bruises covered his face and stab wounds covered his arms. I ran over to him and gently leaned down to stroke a part of his face that wasn't bruised or hurt. I instantly broke down crying. It was my fault he was in the position he was in. He was bruised and and wounded because of my stupidity and bad temper. The only person I loved was laying there dying. It was my fault. I had overreacted and got too mad. He had just went out and I flipped out and went off on him then hit him. Then being attacked. I deserved to be in that spot. I wanted to take that spot. As long as it wasn't him. Now he's going to die because of me. I began sobbing. I cried out in agony and held his hand. "Ryeowook......I’m
so sorry.........I’m so sorry.............I should of listened to you....I shouldn't of been such a idiot.........I shouldn't of reacted the way I did.......it's all my fault you're in this spot right
now.......you don't deserve to be in this position...........I do..............I was the one who caused this for you.......If I wouldn't of overreacted and been
jealous......I’m sorry...I would understand if you hate me now....for what I've done to you....I'm sorry.....I'm sorry.....I love you........I'm so sorry" I kept sobbing till I couldn't cry anymore........I drug myself over to the chair dragged it next to Ryeowook's bed. I fell asleep holding his hand.
That morning I woke up to a loud beeping. It was Ryeowook's monitor was beeping. I ran out into the hallway screaming for help. Nurses ran in there along with a few doctors. They asked me to leave the room I refused to leave but a few doctors picked me up and carried me out into the hallway. I paced up and down the hallway for what felt like hours. Then a doctor walked out of the room. "I'm sorry." He said. "We tried our best but..........he just had too many and too deep of wounds to recover. His body is too weak. His heart just gave out." I fainted after hearing those words.
I felt the rain coming down hard and heavy on my shoulders. My hair was being drenched from the rain. I stood there. A bouquet of white roses that were from the top of his casket in my hand. I stared down at the hole in the ground and the small, black casket being lowered into it. He was in there. He was dead. It was my entire fault. If I hadn't of left him alone. If I wouldn't of been such an
idiot. If I would of been there. If I was....none of this would have happened.
But now he’s gone forever~