(no subject)
Tittle: Hatsu Koi
Genre: sorta angst
Disclaimer: although I luv them to death, I STILL DO NOT OWN THEM. I’m making this out of boredom, and not making any profit out of it. So do not sue me!
Summary: They’re already together, but someone from Ryo’s past came back, shaking up their relationship.
Rating: PG15
A/N: this one is dedicated to my dearest dephi her birthday~ gomenn2 I was away from home for a week. and as always, thanks to the wonderful funkysparks for being my wonderful beta
Hatsu Koi (First Love)
Part 1
He stood there hastily, waiting. He had promised to meet him here, in a café near the Jimusho. He looked down at his watch, 7.30 am. Damn he’s late, he cursed in his heart. Well, this was the first time the other man was late. There’s always a first time for everything though, Tatsuya rolled his eyes.
5 minutes later, the man that he’d been waiting before came in running. “Sorry, caught up with something.” he said, hands on his knee, trying to catch his breath, then sat opposite him. They ordered their food and ate quietly. Later they walked to the Jimusho together.
Before they managed to enter the building, Ryo stopped him, glancing at him nervously, “Tatsuya, I’m sorry I couldn’t spend time with you this weekend. I need to go back to Osaka, something came up.” He said that hurriedly, trying not to make his boyfriend angry.
Tatsuya looked at him contently. He did realize that his boyfriend of 2 months seemed to be quiet when they were having breakfast, thinking maybe it was his bad mood on early morning that may cause it. Now that he knew the reason, he just shrugged at him. Smiling a bit, “It’s okay Ryo, that thing must be important, I understand. Ja.” Without waiting his reply, Tatsuya walked away, remembering that he had an early practice that morning.
Ryo only managed to look at his boyfriend tenderly. His heart was breaking inside.
If only you knew Tatsuya…
Later, feeling that he couldn’t keep it anymore to himself, he needed to find someone to talk to. How I wish I could talk to Tatsuya freely, like always, but now, he knew he couldn’t. Pulling out his phone from his jeans pocket, he dialed a familiar number.
“Moshi moshi”
“Pi, it’s me Ryo”
“Baka, I knew it was you, your ID pop up remember? What’s up?”
“Where are you right now?” Ryo asked him desperately, wishing that Pi was somewhere near.
“I’m on the way to Jimusho. Ryo what’s wrong? You sound… ” Pi’s voice trailed, not wanting to voice out his wariness.
“I’m on the rooftop, come here quickly. I need to talk to you about something.” He hung up abruptly. He couldn’t say it anymore. They needed to talk face to face.
20 minutes later, Pi found his best friend on the rooftop, smoking continuously. There was something bugging his mind though. Fighting with Ueda-kun again? He chuckled. That would not be the first time, but the sexy Osaka man never confronted him when he had any problems with the petite man. Maybe something else. Brushing away his thoughts, he approached the other.
“Yo Ryo! What’s up?” Pi tried to cheer up the other by patting on his shoulder. But still Ryo just looked at him indifferently. Stopping himself, he sat next to him. “What’s wrong? You seem, I dunno, miserable. Fight again?” Pi gave him a sly smile.
Ryo merely raised an eyebrow. “Were we that bad? I mean with fighting and making up again?”
Pi laughed at Ryo’s replied. “Of course moron! I’ve never seen anybody who fight so hard one minute, and then make out so fast, and damn hard. I dunno what’s wrong with you guys” Pi said absent-mindedly. “Or was it your slogan? ‘Fight hard and make out hard’?” Pi laughed at his own brilliant idea. Stupid baka, Ryo can only rolled his eyes at his friend’s stupidity.
Having his laugh to ends, wiping his tears due to excessive laughing, “If you don’t have any problems with him, then what’s the problem Ryo? Are you having problem with sex? Hm… knowing you, I don’t think so. Or was it Ueda-kun? Oh my God Ryo, I’m sorry to know it. You want me to help you? Maybe we can find some porn tape for him to practice with you, or supplement? Or-” Pi talked frantically non stop, but before long Ryo stopped him.
Throwing away his cigarette butt angrily, he looked straight into Pi’s eyes. This made Pi stopped talking straight away. “That’s not it damn it! There’s nothing wrong with us, with our relationship, and Tatsuya, he- he’s damn hot in bed, having sex with him is totally awesome and-” looking at his friend’s expression, Ryo stopped his words straight away. They don’t need to know our sex life.
Ryo sighed. He sat back on the bench next to his best friend. “Thanks Ryo, now I really can’t wipe off the image of Ueda-kun naked on your bed.” Pi said at last, trying to make a straight face, but failed miserably. “So what the hell is your problem? You’re getting on my nerves.” Pi added, facing his best friend with concern.
Taking a deep breath, Ryo said it out at last. “She wants me back, Pi.”
**#**#**#**#**#**#**#**
Tatsuya was having his break from KATTUN’s dance practice, Jin had made him buy them drinks today, saying that it’s his turn. He also specifically requested him to buy from the top floor vending machine, saying the drinks there varied more. How childish, but he still went to buy them drinks because he didn’t want to hear Jin whining endlessly. To make him feel better, Kame said he would go with him, saying it’ll be too much for him to carry all the drinks alone the way to the vending machine.
They walked pass the rooftop door on the way to the vending machine, but hearing someone’s loud voice made them stop.
“If you don’t have any problems with him, then what’s the problem Ryo? Are you having problem with sex? Hm… knowing you, I don’t think so. Or was it Ueda-kun? Oh my God Ryo, I’m sorry to know it. You want me to help you? Maybe we can find some porn tape for him to practice with you, or supplement? Or-”
Curiosity made Tatsuya stopped to listen more, it sounds like Yamapi though.
“That’s not it damn it! There’s nothing wrong with us, with our relationship, and Tatsuya, he- he’s damn hot on the bed, having sex with him is totally awesome and-”
This made Tatsuya blushed furiously. Trying to cover Kame’s mouth from exploding with laughter, he straight away whispered to him to go to the vending machine, not wanting to hear more of their conversation. Stupid boyfriend, he is soo not getting any for a week, Tatsuya pouted. Half-dragging Kame to the machine…
She wants me back, Pi.”
That made Tatsuya stopped in his track. Clutching hard on Kame’s hand, he looked at him with fear in his eyes. Straight away understanding his feelings, Kame pulled him close to the door.
Tatsuya peeked from the door. Ryo was smoking, he was surprised. He never smoked unless he was tense or had too much work.
“She wants me back Pi, Nana. We met at a konbini near my house last week. I don’t know what to do. She said she’s willing to wait no matter how long. Pi I-I don’t know what to do. I ” Ryo inhaled harshly, “I don’t know who to choose.”
Pi threw an angry look at him. “What the hell is that suppose to mean? You don’t know who to choose? Okay then, answer this simple question. Who do you love more? Who do you love now? ” Pi emphasized those two words to make Ryo make up his mind, fast. This is hard, Pi said to himself.
Tatsuya gripped Kame’s hand tightly, praying that Ryo’s answer would be him. He fought the tears which were dangerously brimming in his eyes. Kame smiled at him soothingly, hugging him softly.
Ryo threw his hand in the air exasperatedly, “I don’t know, Pi. Oh God I really don’t know! Right now, I love Tatsuya so much I could never let him go. Being apart with him when I was working in Osaka alone made me feel like hell. But still…” his voice trailed away.
“What the fuck Ryo? You said you love him, so what’s the problem?”Pi hissed at his friend’s confusion. What’s the problem Ryo?
Hearing this made Tatsuya relieved, but before long, there is a ‘but’, Tatsuya frowned. This made him scared.
“She was my first love damn it! I could never forget her, it was hard to let her go, and now she’s back. I loved her, and she still has a very special place in my heart Pi.” Ryo choked at his own words, feeling his heart shatter more as he let out all those uncaring words.
Hearing this made Tatsuya sink to the floor. He sobbed quietly. Kame gave him a bear hug, understanding how broken-hearted he was.
They became silent for a long time. At last Pi voiced out his idea. “I don’t know if it’ll be a good solution for you but I think in order to make your final decision, I think you need to spend time with both of them. That’ll make justice for both of them. This is not a game Ryo, it’s about your heart, and later try to close your eyes, just think about who you want to be with, your heart will determine it.” Pi patted his shoulder, smiled at him encouragingly, and walked away.
Sensing that they both had stopped talking, Kame dragged Tatsuya to the nearest toilet. There Tatsuya let out all his tears. Clutching tightly onto Kame’s shirt, “He’s going to let me go Kame! I could never compete with his first love. It’s a defeat from the start!” he started to sob hysterically, pulling his knees to his face. I’m a loser…
Kame smiled at him, gently pulled away his damp bangs from his face, wiping his tears away. “How could you give up so fast Tat-chan? Didn’t you hear him saying that he loves you? So what are your doubts?”
“He -hic- said he still love that girl, and she’s -hic- his first lo-” before he could finish his sentence, Kame pulled him to an embrace. Patting his back, “Tat-chan, this is your fight. You need to open up his eyes, show that you’re the one that he loves the most; she’s just a shadow from the past.”
Sensing the older man had more doubts, Kame stopped him, “No more buts Tat chan, show him that he needs you the most.” Pulling him in arm length, Kame looked at him straight, “While he’s with you, please cherish your moments together okay? Make the most you can of your time together. It may be short, but the memories will last a lifetime right?”
Tatsuya smiled at him hearing this. He couldn’t believe him, the eldest of them all, getting advice from Kame, who is the youngest. Well he did grow up to be a wise man though, and thank God he’s with Jin, at least there’s someone with a brain in the relationship.
Later after finishing their practice, he walked to the nearest park. He sat on one of the swings and looked around.
He walked around the neighbourhood. Later something caught his eyes. He saw a woman walked out form a shop with his son, who held her hand happily. Later her husband came with a car and fetched them away. They looked so happy. A family. A child. That’s the thing that he could never give Ryo, no matter how hard he tried. A single tear rolled down his cheek when he thought about this.
**flashback**
“Okaasan, why do we have to let it go away? I can take care of it better!” 5-year-old Tatsuya whined. He had been taking care of the wounded bird for two weeks, and he had grown fond of it.
“Tatsuya honey, listen, it may be hard, but we need to let it go. Maybe we can take care of it better, but it’s for the best.” Her mother tried to coax him from not letting the bird fly away.
“In real life too, if we love someone, we need to let that person go, to give them some space. By doing this, that person will know how much you love them ne~” his mother said gently, patting his head
“But then what if that person never comes back? What if that person forgets about me? What if this bird flies away so far and never comes back?” Tatsuya whined more, he started to cry.
His mother gently wiped his tears away. “Tatsuya, we need to let go of the person that we love to give them some space. If that person loves you, that person will come back to you no matter what. But if that person is not for you then they won’t. Have faith in yourself. Same goes for this bird. But I think it’ll come back since you’ve been a good master to it ne~ “
“Really?” Tatsuya’s eyes sparkled with joy, thinking that the bird will come back and visit him. His mother just chuckled looking at this.
**end of flashback**
He remembered those words. He never thought he will ever use it. Now it’s time, he said to himself. He promised himself that he’ll follow Kame’s advice, cherish your moments together. He had come to a solution, and he’s determined to do it.
A/N:Ok this one, I make it into 3 parts coz its kinda long. I don’t want to make you guys bored, so I’ll post it each everyday, promise! and again, happy belated birthday devi chan~ hope you had great times and a very good year coming!