Used, bitter, but TRULY justified.
Feeling REALLY purple today...
I mostly just feel used. I knew in the back of my mind that he would get scared and go back, but really? 5 days? REALLY? So I wonder who he was thinking of last weekend on my couch...
He's a damn coward, and I'm sorry if this sounds bitter (cuz I am) but if you come to a realization that you're not meant to be with this person and you really don't have that much in common and then go back on it all of a sudden because you've lost your damn safety net, then well, what? If you go back on it because you're scared of the other option (me) and what that might mean...what? I realize that you're scared of change...but really, James? You're right. I'll never look at you the same. You're not the strong man I thought you were. You're a damn fool. Go on, pretend to be happy. Go on get mad at me for posting this. What are you going to do about it? Get mad, not talk to me, pretend not to care, and go on seeing how far you can push me? This was just a game to you, right? That's how you justified it, right? God forbid you actually talk to me like an adult and get this out so we can still have our friendship.
I don't think you know what you've done here, by hurting me like this. But you will, Sugar. And maybe, when you finally do figure it out, I might still be around. But for the next few weeks, or however long it takes me to deal with this and your hypocritical self, you have to deal with what you've unleashed. And if we're still friends after that, then maybe...I don't know.
Kinda funny...She doesn't even know the real you. I wonder what she would think if she did. You wouldn't have even had to fight this war if she did. But I know you, James. And I still would have been fighting for you.
I stand by my statement. You're a coward and a damn fool. And I HOPE I'm around when you realize it.
~Jessica~
(Allannah)
I mostly just feel used. I knew in the back of my mind that he would get scared and go back, but really? 5 days? REALLY? So I wonder who he was thinking of last weekend on my couch...
He's a damn coward, and I'm sorry if this sounds bitter (cuz I am) but if you come to a realization that you're not meant to be with this person and you really don't have that much in common and then go back on it all of a sudden because you've lost your damn safety net, then well, what? If you go back on it because you're scared of the other option (me) and what that might mean...what? I realize that you're scared of change...but really, James? You're right. I'll never look at you the same. You're not the strong man I thought you were. You're a damn fool. Go on, pretend to be happy. Go on get mad at me for posting this. What are you going to do about it? Get mad, not talk to me, pretend not to care, and go on seeing how far you can push me? This was just a game to you, right? That's how you justified it, right? God forbid you actually talk to me like an adult and get this out so we can still have our friendship.
I don't think you know what you've done here, by hurting me like this. But you will, Sugar. And maybe, when you finally do figure it out, I might still be around. But for the next few weeks, or however long it takes me to deal with this and your hypocritical self, you have to deal with what you've unleashed. And if we're still friends after that, then maybe...I don't know.
Kinda funny...She doesn't even know the real you. I wonder what she would think if she did. You wouldn't have even had to fight this war if she did. But I know you, James. And I still would have been fighting for you.
I stand by my statement. You're a coward and a damn fool. And I HOPE I'm around when you realize it.
~Jessica~
(Allannah)