Frustrated
I am updating simply because I caaaaaaaaan!!! I really don't think anyone reads this anymore anyway. I checked all the friends I have listed on my friends list...one has not been on LJ for a year. I guess I will have to really think about the MySpace avenue if I wanna check on my friends and stuff. Grrrrrrr...speakin' of friends...one of my reasons I am frustrated. I litterally woke up grouchy this morning so that doesn't help. And lemme just say if anyone is reading this that you THINK I am talking about you or I am actually talking about you this is a way for me to vent...and I figure no one reads this anyway. So, I am writing and letting it go which means I probably won't say something to you because it is not important to a better relationship.
So, my husband get's up earlier than me, my alarm clock does not wake me up, he's been out of the shower for a while and doesn't wake me till like 720 and i gotta leave in 10 minutes...in that 10 minutes(20 is pushin it but i can make it 20)I have to get my daughter up who hates to rush in the morning like me, get her school bag ready, maker her lunch, get her breakfast, keep pushing her to get dressed and because my hubby had to leave early for work I have to get my other daughter up and get her breakfast which ended up being a breakfast bar they shared int he car with milk. So he's bein all casual and of course I'm cranky. Now if you have know me for as long as he has you would think he would remember by now I hate rushing for anything and I hate mornings and I don't talk in the morning. So he has put me in a position where I have to rush (he totally could have made sure/helped me get up by seven) AND he's tryin' to talk to me!! THEN he opens the garage door and says "Your dome light in your car is on"...WTF do I care!!! Why are you telling me!!! Go fix it and leave me to rush and wake up!! Not a good start to my morning at all!!
And I am having friend issues. I have a friend that doesn't tell me crap because they "forget". Like once they say it to whoever they say it to it's out of their heads. Then I find out crap through the grape vine...so aggravating. So I got to thinkin' why does this bother me so much? Because it makes me feel like I am not important to my friends like important enough to remember to share somethin that was kinda a big deal to them really. But then I thought about somethin one of my other friends did to me and it hurt me so bad. Actually two friends...when I was having a really hard time in my life they came to me and basically said how I was handling things was wrong and I was being a horrible friend so how am I gonna be a hypocrite and do the same thing to my friends!! I'm not...so I am venting here. I strive so often it seems to overcome the natural desire to be selfish. Hard for me when it seems there are so many people including those that I am close to that don't try. And I get the shaft, the raw end of the deal. Like I am always there for them at the right time, like I call or I'm there, for them to have somone to listen to. I guess I am partly frustrated with my friends because one of my friends is far away and we talk less and less...no one to blame for it. I absolutley HATE that happens. Another one of my friends is going through a really hard time and they don't call me back. Holy crap I need to get a LIFE!!! Speaking of life....I get aggravated with so many people if they forget to tell me about something or invite me along. I actually think they both have something to do with neglect. I wanna say soemthing but it's like does it matter? Is it gonna change how I feel about my friends? Am i gonna love them more or less because they don't do something? NO!!! So why waste my breath on an issue that is mine. I am just going to love them and try to do my best for them. That's all I can ask of myself. Say sorry for my faults and let it go.
Ah! Okay! I'm done!
So, my husband get's up earlier than me, my alarm clock does not wake me up, he's been out of the shower for a while and doesn't wake me till like 720 and i gotta leave in 10 minutes...in that 10 minutes(20 is pushin it but i can make it 20)I have to get my daughter up who hates to rush in the morning like me, get her school bag ready, maker her lunch, get her breakfast, keep pushing her to get dressed and because my hubby had to leave early for work I have to get my other daughter up and get her breakfast which ended up being a breakfast bar they shared int he car with milk. So he's bein all casual and of course I'm cranky. Now if you have know me for as long as he has you would think he would remember by now I hate rushing for anything and I hate mornings and I don't talk in the morning. So he has put me in a position where I have to rush (he totally could have made sure/helped me get up by seven) AND he's tryin' to talk to me!! THEN he opens the garage door and says "Your dome light in your car is on"...WTF do I care!!! Why are you telling me!!! Go fix it and leave me to rush and wake up!! Not a good start to my morning at all!!
And I am having friend issues. I have a friend that doesn't tell me crap because they "forget". Like once they say it to whoever they say it to it's out of their heads. Then I find out crap through the grape vine...so aggravating. So I got to thinkin' why does this bother me so much? Because it makes me feel like I am not important to my friends like important enough to remember to share somethin that was kinda a big deal to them really. But then I thought about somethin one of my other friends did to me and it hurt me so bad. Actually two friends...when I was having a really hard time in my life they came to me and basically said how I was handling things was wrong and I was being a horrible friend so how am I gonna be a hypocrite and do the same thing to my friends!! I'm not...so I am venting here. I strive so often it seems to overcome the natural desire to be selfish. Hard for me when it seems there are so many people including those that I am close to that don't try. And I get the shaft, the raw end of the deal. Like I am always there for them at the right time, like I call or I'm there, for them to have somone to listen to. I guess I am partly frustrated with my friends because one of my friends is far away and we talk less and less...no one to blame for it. I absolutley HATE that happens. Another one of my friends is going through a really hard time and they don't call me back. Holy crap I need to get a LIFE!!! Speaking of life....I get aggravated with so many people if they forget to tell me about something or invite me along. I actually think they both have something to do with neglect. I wanna say soemthing but it's like does it matter? Is it gonna change how I feel about my friends? Am i gonna love them more or less because they don't do something? NO!!! So why waste my breath on an issue that is mine. I am just going to love them and try to do my best for them. That's all I can ask of myself. Say sorry for my faults and let it go.
Ah! Okay! I'm done!