Torchwood: children of earth
So, Torchwood.
Before the cut, let me say: I loved Children of Earth. I loved the writing, I thought it was about 6 times better than the usual Torchwood stuff, I was overall fascinated, brokenhearted, excited and entertained by the storylines. The acting was good, the writing was good - the scifi was full of plotholes but wow do I not watch Torchwood for the plot - the directing was gorgeous and the characterization... well, I need a whole cut tag to talk about that.
I woke up on the morning after Ep 4 aired to emails and messages from friends that something big had gone down on Torchwood. I didn't know what it was and didn't start suspecting until Jack and Ianto gathered their forces and left to talk to the 456, leaving Gwen in charge of the HQ computer job.
I was like, "wait, why's Gwen staying at HQ? That's totally Ianto's job. Since when is he the guy you take on an actual field mission?" and then... you know.
I had a really rough time with Jack's reaction to Ianto's death. It seemed, in Ep 4, not emotional enough. He barely cried! He comforted GWEN! I expected Ep 5 to be all about his grieving process, but instead... it really wasn't.
In retrospect, it was a brilliant storytelling/acting choice. Because it really hammers in for me just how many times Jack has gone through this. How many lovers he's lost, in various circumstances, over the years. He was sad, heartbroken, he was grieving, but that sense of OH GOD TELL ME THIS ISN'T HAPPENING wasn't quite there because I think, based on his reaction, Jack is sort of always ready for it to happen, on some level. He doesn't get to live with the illusion we all live with, that our loved ones are going to live forever. He's outlived too many of them.
The other thing that I really, really loved about Jack's character development, the Main Idea, you might say, imo, of who he is and what Torchwood was about, is that... Jack is not a hero. He is a man with good intentions who sometimes does the right thing and sometimes doesn't but he is NOT the characteristic Hollywood "hero" who is a confident leader who always knows what to do. He is just... not that guy. He is not, ironically, indestructible. He is not impervious.
Maybe this makes me odd, but my favorite moment of characterization in Ep 4 was when it became obvious Ianto was dying and Jack started screaming "I take it back! I take it all back! Not him!" Because in that moment he was basically saying "have your millions of children; I'll be good, I'll be quiet, just give him back to me".
And that is not what Heroes, with a capital H, do.
And I just thought that was brilliant. Because Jack can be weak and selfish as much as he can be selfless and brave. And you see this again when they take Jack into the cell. Lois keeps yelling "Captain, captain!" and Jack is just... he's done. And he's not so broken up in grief he can't think, can't talk, can't sit still. He's... grieving but he's still there. He's just given up. He's broken. Something really personal and really bad happened and suddenly he's given up. And Heroes don't do that either. Jack just GIVES UP sometimes and again, that is just such a brilliant touch of storytelling for me.
My personal reading of Torchwood was that it was the first time in Jack's life that he allowed himself to play the Hero. The leader, the guy everyone depended on who was the source of everyone's strength and confidence, who never gave up and never gave in. And it was a role, it was not something that came naturally to him, it was something he had to grow into and constantly make sure the seams weren't showing and wonder if one day it would really become part of his skin.
I think you can see proof of this in the repeated theme of the team finding out Something Awful from Jack's past and confronting him about it and Jack... never ever being really comfortable with it. Never once did he stand up and go "oh well, yeah, you know, shit happens" or "I was a different guy then", never once was he calm about it, like he'd made peace with who he'd been and what he'd done. He was always anxious, secretive, there was always drama. Almost like Jack was afraid if they learned about his past they'd somehow find out "the truth", that maybe he wasn't a Hero after all.
And we see this when we go into Ep 5 and suddenly he has to make the choice between sacrificing his kid, and watching him die horribly, and not saving the planet. And he makes that impossible choice and I think it... breaks him a little, in a way other things hadn't managed to do.
And when he talks to Gwen on the hill... I think the way he blames himself for the deaths of Suzie, Tosh, Owen, Ianto, he's not really blaming himself in the general sense that a leader blames himself for the loss of his team members despite the impossible circumstances. I think he's really saying "I tried to play the Hero, I tried to be that guy, I built this team around me and tried to make it That Story, and look what happened". Which of course I don't agree with, we the audience don't agree with, because we know Jack did his best and it couldn't have really worked out any other way (well, it could have, but you get my point). But I think Jack really believes that it's his fault because he's not a Hero (as the Doctor is to some extent), he's just this guy.
And when he runs away, I think he's running away from that role, possibly forever. He's going back to being just Jack, whose mistakes won't cost anyone a thing. He may go back to helping save the universe, he may sacrifice himself again, but I think it'll be a long while, if ever, before he becomes the kind of leader he was for Torchwood. I think he'd have to find a way of doing it that wouldn't require him stepping into that Hero role again, to do it.
Honestly I think even if he were to get over everyone's deaths the one that would weigh heaviest on him, for the sheer sense memory of that experience, would be killing his own grandson. Because killing a child, killing a relative, is not something a Hero does. It's not something he can ever really explain away to any potential Torchwood-like team. Some people could possibly explain it away, but not Jack. Or at least not the Jack I know.
So, thank you Torchwood, for that amazing, fantastic ride.
Before the cut, let me say: I loved Children of Earth. I loved the writing, I thought it was about 6 times better than the usual Torchwood stuff, I was overall fascinated, brokenhearted, excited and entertained by the storylines. The acting was good, the writing was good - the scifi was full of plotholes but wow do I not watch Torchwood for the plot - the directing was gorgeous and the characterization... well, I need a whole cut tag to talk about that.
I woke up on the morning after Ep 4 aired to emails and messages from friends that something big had gone down on Torchwood. I didn't know what it was and didn't start suspecting until Jack and Ianto gathered their forces and left to talk to the 456, leaving Gwen in charge of the HQ computer job.
I was like, "wait, why's Gwen staying at HQ? That's totally Ianto's job. Since when is he the guy you take on an actual field mission?" and then... you know.
I had a really rough time with Jack's reaction to Ianto's death. It seemed, in Ep 4, not emotional enough. He barely cried! He comforted GWEN! I expected Ep 5 to be all about his grieving process, but instead... it really wasn't.
In retrospect, it was a brilliant storytelling/acting choice. Because it really hammers in for me just how many times Jack has gone through this. How many lovers he's lost, in various circumstances, over the years. He was sad, heartbroken, he was grieving, but that sense of OH GOD TELL ME THIS ISN'T HAPPENING wasn't quite there because I think, based on his reaction, Jack is sort of always ready for it to happen, on some level. He doesn't get to live with the illusion we all live with, that our loved ones are going to live forever. He's outlived too many of them.
The other thing that I really, really loved about Jack's character development, the Main Idea, you might say, imo, of who he is and what Torchwood was about, is that... Jack is not a hero. He is a man with good intentions who sometimes does the right thing and sometimes doesn't but he is NOT the characteristic Hollywood "hero" who is a confident leader who always knows what to do. He is just... not that guy. He is not, ironically, indestructible. He is not impervious.
Maybe this makes me odd, but my favorite moment of characterization in Ep 4 was when it became obvious Ianto was dying and Jack started screaming "I take it back! I take it all back! Not him!" Because in that moment he was basically saying "have your millions of children; I'll be good, I'll be quiet, just give him back to me".
And that is not what Heroes, with a capital H, do.
And I just thought that was brilliant. Because Jack can be weak and selfish as much as he can be selfless and brave. And you see this again when they take Jack into the cell. Lois keeps yelling "Captain, captain!" and Jack is just... he's done. And he's not so broken up in grief he can't think, can't talk, can't sit still. He's... grieving but he's still there. He's just given up. He's broken. Something really personal and really bad happened and suddenly he's given up. And Heroes don't do that either. Jack just GIVES UP sometimes and again, that is just such a brilliant touch of storytelling for me.
My personal reading of Torchwood was that it was the first time in Jack's life that he allowed himself to play the Hero. The leader, the guy everyone depended on who was the source of everyone's strength and confidence, who never gave up and never gave in. And it was a role, it was not something that came naturally to him, it was something he had to grow into and constantly make sure the seams weren't showing and wonder if one day it would really become part of his skin.
I think you can see proof of this in the repeated theme of the team finding out Something Awful from Jack's past and confronting him about it and Jack... never ever being really comfortable with it. Never once did he stand up and go "oh well, yeah, you know, shit happens" or "I was a different guy then", never once was he calm about it, like he'd made peace with who he'd been and what he'd done. He was always anxious, secretive, there was always drama. Almost like Jack was afraid if they learned about his past they'd somehow find out "the truth", that maybe he wasn't a Hero after all.
And we see this when we go into Ep 5 and suddenly he has to make the choice between sacrificing his kid, and watching him die horribly, and not saving the planet. And he makes that impossible choice and I think it... breaks him a little, in a way other things hadn't managed to do.
And when he talks to Gwen on the hill... I think the way he blames himself for the deaths of Suzie, Tosh, Owen, Ianto, he's not really blaming himself in the general sense that a leader blames himself for the loss of his team members despite the impossible circumstances. I think he's really saying "I tried to play the Hero, I tried to be that guy, I built this team around me and tried to make it That Story, and look what happened". Which of course I don't agree with, we the audience don't agree with, because we know Jack did his best and it couldn't have really worked out any other way (well, it could have, but you get my point). But I think Jack really believes that it's his fault because he's not a Hero (as the Doctor is to some extent), he's just this guy.
And when he runs away, I think he's running away from that role, possibly forever. He's going back to being just Jack, whose mistakes won't cost anyone a thing. He may go back to helping save the universe, he may sacrifice himself again, but I think it'll be a long while, if ever, before he becomes the kind of leader he was for Torchwood. I think he'd have to find a way of doing it that wouldn't require him stepping into that Hero role again, to do it.
Honestly I think even if he were to get over everyone's deaths the one that would weigh heaviest on him, for the sheer sense memory of that experience, would be killing his own grandson. Because killing a child, killing a relative, is not something a Hero does. It's not something he can ever really explain away to any potential Torchwood-like team. Some people could possibly explain it away, but not Jack. Or at least not the Jack I know.
So, thank you Torchwood, for that amazing, fantastic ride.