Forever Your Most Vivid Dream
Title: Forever Your Most Vivid Dream
Author: all_depends
Rating: PG
Pairing: Any pairing will work, but in my mind Brendon is speaking to Ryan.
POV: First
Summary: After years of being your best friend, I have to say that I enjoyed every minute of it, and I'm glad I met you.
Disclaimer: This all came from my mind. I own no one.
Beta: youignorantfool
Author Notes: I started writing down whatever came to mind, and this happened.
You’re right here lying on the roof, gazing at the stars and staring at the moon. I know you’re trying as hard as you can to look past all the black and the dots of white. You don’t have to. Frankly, you won’t see anything. Eyes provide vision by seeking superficial light. If you want to see more than combinations from the color spectrum, you have to look within yourself. Close your eyes, even, and you just might see more clearly what you’re looking for.
That time, when I said I loved you, I meant it. And I might be making this up, but I could swear you said it back in a whisper that barely reached my ears. Actions speak louder than words, which reassures me that you truly felt something for me, that my love wasn’t unrequited. Still, I would have wanted to ask you to speak up, just once. It would have been nice to hear it.
I’m not sure you know this, but you made me cry more than once. It sounds selfish putting it that way, because really, I made myself cry. If you ever heard me say sorry, you can bet I was reproaching myself just moments before. Knowing I’d hurt you would consequently boomerang on me. It was confusing and frustrating because I never knew if I should or shouldn’t be mad at you for something. Even when you did something that would upset me, I would question my negative reaction, because I didn’t want to instill guilt on you. I don’t know if that was normal.
I remember you telling me I was your guardian angel. I felt like your guardian angel, always looking out for you. Waking up in a hospital room was a bit scary, I must admit, but it’s okay. I would have done it again. It was painful and the recovery was slow, but that’s just part of the job. I’m glad it happened the way it happened, if it had to happen at all. If I had seen you lying on that hospital bed with bruises I knew I could’ve taken from you, I would’ve had a hard time forgiving myself. The only thing I feel bad about is that you probably felt that way, being at the other end. We can never be satisfied. I still think it was worth it.
And for you that feeling was amplified a year later, when destiny decided to keep us apart. I know you’re hurt, but you have to know that it wasn’t your fault, that you don’t have to live with that guilt.
After years of being your best friend, I have to say that I enjoyed every minute of it, and I’m glad I met you. I’m not sure of the ending, though. I know my feelings, although I’m still uncertain of yours, but I’m sure we were going somewhere. Gosh, it ended so soon, just there when I felt myself growing closer to you and you growing closer to me. I never even had a chance to kiss your lips. Tonight I’ll do just that, touch your lips for the first time and seal my love for once and for all. I love you. I hope this counts, even if it’s one-sided. No-it’s not one-sided; you’re thinking of me, and that makes it count. So I’ll pretend you can hear me sitting here by you. And I’ll keep talking and watch you gaze, watch you remember, watch you sleep. And remember to look within yourself. I’m not out there among the stars. I’m in your memory, in your heart. Now it’s almost time for me to go, so I have to say goodbye. Close your eyes, and when you remember my smile and the sound of my voice, and that tear starts progressing out your eyelid and toward your cheek, I’ll lean down and kiss you goodbye. Ready? One… Two…
Author: all_depends
Rating: PG
Pairing: Any pairing will work, but in my mind Brendon is speaking to Ryan.
POV: First
Summary: After years of being your best friend, I have to say that I enjoyed every minute of it, and I'm glad I met you.
Disclaimer: This all came from my mind. I own no one.
Beta: youignorantfool
Author Notes: I started writing down whatever came to mind, and this happened.
You’re right here lying on the roof, gazing at the stars and staring at the moon. I know you’re trying as hard as you can to look past all the black and the dots of white. You don’t have to. Frankly, you won’t see anything. Eyes provide vision by seeking superficial light. If you want to see more than combinations from the color spectrum, you have to look within yourself. Close your eyes, even, and you just might see more clearly what you’re looking for.
That time, when I said I loved you, I meant it. And I might be making this up, but I could swear you said it back in a whisper that barely reached my ears. Actions speak louder than words, which reassures me that you truly felt something for me, that my love wasn’t unrequited. Still, I would have wanted to ask you to speak up, just once. It would have been nice to hear it.
I’m not sure you know this, but you made me cry more than once. It sounds selfish putting it that way, because really, I made myself cry. If you ever heard me say sorry, you can bet I was reproaching myself just moments before. Knowing I’d hurt you would consequently boomerang on me. It was confusing and frustrating because I never knew if I should or shouldn’t be mad at you for something. Even when you did something that would upset me, I would question my negative reaction, because I didn’t want to instill guilt on you. I don’t know if that was normal.
I remember you telling me I was your guardian angel. I felt like your guardian angel, always looking out for you. Waking up in a hospital room was a bit scary, I must admit, but it’s okay. I would have done it again. It was painful and the recovery was slow, but that’s just part of the job. I’m glad it happened the way it happened, if it had to happen at all. If I had seen you lying on that hospital bed with bruises I knew I could’ve taken from you, I would’ve had a hard time forgiving myself. The only thing I feel bad about is that you probably felt that way, being at the other end. We can never be satisfied. I still think it was worth it.
And for you that feeling was amplified a year later, when destiny decided to keep us apart. I know you’re hurt, but you have to know that it wasn’t your fault, that you don’t have to live with that guilt.
After years of being your best friend, I have to say that I enjoyed every minute of it, and I’m glad I met you. I’m not sure of the ending, though. I know my feelings, although I’m still uncertain of yours, but I’m sure we were going somewhere. Gosh, it ended so soon, just there when I felt myself growing closer to you and you growing closer to me. I never even had a chance to kiss your lips. Tonight I’ll do just that, touch your lips for the first time and seal my love for once and for all. I love you. I hope this counts, even if it’s one-sided. No-it’s not one-sided; you’re thinking of me, and that makes it count. So I’ll pretend you can hear me sitting here by you. And I’ll keep talking and watch you gaze, watch you remember, watch you sleep. And remember to look within yourself. I’m not out there among the stars. I’m in your memory, in your heart. Now it’s almost time for me to go, so I have to say goodbye. Close your eyes, and when you remember my smile and the sound of my voice, and that tear starts progressing out your eyelid and toward your cheek, I’ll lean down and kiss you goodbye. Ready? One… Two…