(no subject)
i have no idea what to write, and yet i can't get rid of this nagging feeling of *needing* to write.
something about the weather getting autumny and just *right*, even as it pisses me off because it's still too warm and it's rainy and i hate it when it rains. at least, when it does this retarded on/off thing it's been doing for the last few weeks in general (except obviously this weekend when we barely escaped the remnants of a tropical storm, but meh, details). even in spite of all that, it fits. it fits everything. it fits every unhappy, dissatisfied friend who's going through internal dramas. it fits every messy relationship drama that's chosen *now* to strike.
because what better time for drama than when the air is cooling off and everything starts to die? how else can you keep warm in winter if not by internalizing everything and drawing all of your passions and emotions within?
things are shifting and the world is tilting and i'm not sure quite where i'm at. i'm going through an ebb, i think, but not in terms of life. (my life's never been busier -- a good thing, except when i'm drained and looking for a break.) mostly, my life is steady, constant, stable. it's everything around me that's shifting. and i'm not sure what to do, if there's anything i *can* do, other than to just hold on.
(and since wilson phillips just suddenly appeared in my head, it's definitely time to say goodnight.)
mwah.
~a
ETA 01.00:
1. Story behind your MySpace song:
it's linds' brother, singing leonard cohen's "hallelujah". and it's fucking amazing, and he does crazy wonderful things with the chords. so now it's my song.
2. What month were you born in?
october.
3. Where do you live?
bergen county, nj
4. Wallet:
black chain wallet i've had for years. no, seriously. like, i don't even remember where i got it anymore.
5. Dream car:
civic hybrid, maybe. or a mini cooper.
6. Jewelry worn daily:
toe rings, watch.
7. Love life:
nonexistent, though mostly for lack of trying. i'm on a break.
8. Cologne/Perfume:
on the rare occasion i wear any, it's britney's curious. shut up, it smells good, especially on me. i love ck one, too, but i don't have any right now because i can't get it for free. (i CAN get britney's curious for free, so there.)
9. CD in stereo:
well, erin mckeown's monday morning cold is playing in itunes right now, but in my car i think it's ani's to the teeth, currently.
.:W H A T A R E Y O U :. . .
10. Wearing:
pajama pants & t-shirt.
11. Wanting:
to go to sleep. (my brain won't let me.)
12. The last thing you ate?
chocolate twizzlers.
13. Something you are afraid of:
falling.
14. Do you like candles?
absolutely. i don't burn them often, though, because i have this tendency to forget about things and i'm petrified of burning the house down.
15. Do you believe in love?
yes.
16. Do you believe in soul mates?
no.
17. Do you sleep naked?
if i'm sleeping with someone, maybe. i'm not really a fan, tho.
18. Do you like seafood?
ick, no.
19. Do you consider yourself a studly freak?
what? no.
20. Do you like tattoos?
maybe.
21. What's something you wish you could understand better?
ambition.
22. Are you shy around a crush?
yes.
23. Do you have a bf/gf?
nope.
24. Got any plans for the weekend?
not right now.
25. Who do you miss?
my florida friends.
26. What does your MySpace headline mean?
i don't even know what it is. *goes to check* oh. "jesus says we die a little death for him everyday" is from an erin mckeown song, la petite mort.
27. Elaborate on your default MySpace photo:
my brother took this picture of me at sherwood island, and i just thought it fit.
28. Who is the first person on your top 8?
my linds, of course.
29. What's your relationship with the people in your top 4?
linds is my best friend, sam, jenna & steph are all among my best friends.
30. What exactly are you wearing?
ugh. a black v-neck t-shirt and blue plaid flannel pajama pants. (sexy, huh?)
31. What is your current problem?
money, time, getting along with my family.
32. What do you love most?
my friends.
33. What makes you most happy?
time with my friends.
34. Are you musically inclined?
according to the world and six years at juilliard, i'd say probably.
35. Which shoe goes on first?
good question. usually left, i think.
36. If you could go back in time, and change something....
you know, i might've worked harder to keep matt in my life junior year of college. because that probably would've kept dumbass out.
37. Ever have a near death experience?
not sure.....the car accident probably counts as one, but does it count if you don't remember it?
38. Name an obvious quality you have?
i am very loud and blunt and straight-forward and direct.
39. What's the name of the song that's stuck in your head right now?
i don't have one.
40. Any celeb you would marry?
so many. right this second i'd marry hugh laurie if he'd have me.
41. Who will cut and paste this first?
probably no one. jenna already answered it on myspace, and no one else is really doing memes these days.
42. Name someone with the same birthday as you:
no idea. and i'm too lazy to look.
43. Do you have a crush on someone:
not in my life, not right now. famous people, though, sure.
44. Have you ever vandalized someone's private property?
no.
45. Been in a fight?
yes.
46. Have you ever sung in front of a large audience?
yes.
47. What's the first thing you notice about the preferred sex?
i want to be diplomatic and say eyes, but if it's someone i don't know, like, just walking down the street or whatever? it's usually the breasts.
48. What do you usually order from Starbucks
either a chai or an iced sweetened passion tea. unless i need the caffeine, in which case it's a triple vanilla latte with extra vanilla.
49. Say something totally random about you?
i am a collector. i collect everything.
50. Has anyone ever said you looked like a celebrity?
nope.
51. How old are you?
26 in a little less than a month.
52. Do you wear a watch?
yes.
53. Do you have anything pierced?
my ears
54. Do you have any tattoos?
no.
55. Do you like pain?
yes.
56. Do you like to shop?
yes, except for clothes.
57. What was the last thing you paid for with cash?
my bagel this morning.
58. What was the last thing you paid for with a credit card?
does debit count? because i bought my groceries with my debit card earlier tonight.
59. Who was the last person you spoke to on the phone?
linds (before she bailed on me for mojo, LOL!)
60. What is on your desktop background?
this beautiful background of jim & pam from the season finale of the office.
61. Do you like redheads?
yes.
62. Do you know any twins?
no.
63. Do you have any weird relatives?
yes.
64. What was the last movie you watched?
shattered glass last night.
65. What was the last book you read?
i'm still in the middle of please kill me.
66. Did you or do you go to college?
been there, done that.
67. What is your favorite pair of pants that you own?
i heart my jeans.
68. What is your favorite day of the week?
saturday.
69. What are you going to do after you answer this question?
go to bed, god willing.
something about the weather getting autumny and just *right*, even as it pisses me off because it's still too warm and it's rainy and i hate it when it rains. at least, when it does this retarded on/off thing it's been doing for the last few weeks in general (except obviously this weekend when we barely escaped the remnants of a tropical storm, but meh, details). even in spite of all that, it fits. it fits everything. it fits every unhappy, dissatisfied friend who's going through internal dramas. it fits every messy relationship drama that's chosen *now* to strike.
because what better time for drama than when the air is cooling off and everything starts to die? how else can you keep warm in winter if not by internalizing everything and drawing all of your passions and emotions within?
things are shifting and the world is tilting and i'm not sure quite where i'm at. i'm going through an ebb, i think, but not in terms of life. (my life's never been busier -- a good thing, except when i'm drained and looking for a break.) mostly, my life is steady, constant, stable. it's everything around me that's shifting. and i'm not sure what to do, if there's anything i *can* do, other than to just hold on.
(and since wilson phillips just suddenly appeared in my head, it's definitely time to say goodnight.)
mwah.
~a
ETA 01.00:
1. Story behind your MySpace song:
it's linds' brother, singing leonard cohen's "hallelujah". and it's fucking amazing, and he does crazy wonderful things with the chords. so now it's my song.
2. What month were you born in?
october.
3. Where do you live?
bergen county, nj
4. Wallet:
black chain wallet i've had for years. no, seriously. like, i don't even remember where i got it anymore.
5. Dream car:
civic hybrid, maybe. or a mini cooper.
6. Jewelry worn daily:
toe rings, watch.
7. Love life:
nonexistent, though mostly for lack of trying. i'm on a break.
8. Cologne/Perfume:
on the rare occasion i wear any, it's britney's curious. shut up, it smells good, especially on me. i love ck one, too, but i don't have any right now because i can't get it for free. (i CAN get britney's curious for free, so there.)
9. CD in stereo:
well, erin mckeown's monday morning cold is playing in itunes right now, but in my car i think it's ani's to the teeth, currently.
.:W H A T A R E Y O U :. . .
10. Wearing:
pajama pants & t-shirt.
11. Wanting:
to go to sleep. (my brain won't let me.)
12. The last thing you ate?
chocolate twizzlers.
13. Something you are afraid of:
falling.
14. Do you like candles?
absolutely. i don't burn them often, though, because i have this tendency to forget about things and i'm petrified of burning the house down.
15. Do you believe in love?
yes.
16. Do you believe in soul mates?
no.
17. Do you sleep naked?
if i'm sleeping with someone, maybe. i'm not really a fan, tho.
18. Do you like seafood?
ick, no.
19. Do you consider yourself a studly freak?
what? no.
20. Do you like tattoos?
maybe.
21. What's something you wish you could understand better?
ambition.
22. Are you shy around a crush?
yes.
23. Do you have a bf/gf?
nope.
24. Got any plans for the weekend?
not right now.
25. Who do you miss?
my florida friends.
26. What does your MySpace headline mean?
i don't even know what it is. *goes to check* oh. "jesus says we die a little death for him everyday" is from an erin mckeown song, la petite mort.
27. Elaborate on your default MySpace photo:
my brother took this picture of me at sherwood island, and i just thought it fit.
28. Who is the first person on your top 8?
my linds, of course.
29. What's your relationship with the people in your top 4?
linds is my best friend, sam, jenna & steph are all among my best friends.
30. What exactly are you wearing?
ugh. a black v-neck t-shirt and blue plaid flannel pajama pants. (sexy, huh?)
31. What is your current problem?
money, time, getting along with my family.
32. What do you love most?
my friends.
33. What makes you most happy?
time with my friends.
34. Are you musically inclined?
according to the world and six years at juilliard, i'd say probably.
35. Which shoe goes on first?
good question. usually left, i think.
36. If you could go back in time, and change something....
you know, i might've worked harder to keep matt in my life junior year of college. because that probably would've kept dumbass out.
37. Ever have a near death experience?
not sure.....the car accident probably counts as one, but does it count if you don't remember it?
38. Name an obvious quality you have?
i am very loud and blunt and straight-forward and direct.
39. What's the name of the song that's stuck in your head right now?
i don't have one.
40. Any celeb you would marry?
so many. right this second i'd marry hugh laurie if he'd have me.
41. Who will cut and paste this first?
probably no one. jenna already answered it on myspace, and no one else is really doing memes these days.
42. Name someone with the same birthday as you:
no idea. and i'm too lazy to look.
43. Do you have a crush on someone:
not in my life, not right now. famous people, though, sure.
44. Have you ever vandalized someone's private property?
no.
45. Been in a fight?
yes.
46. Have you ever sung in front of a large audience?
yes.
47. What's the first thing you notice about the preferred sex?
i want to be diplomatic and say eyes, but if it's someone i don't know, like, just walking down the street or whatever? it's usually the breasts.
48. What do you usually order from Starbucks
either a chai or an iced sweetened passion tea. unless i need the caffeine, in which case it's a triple vanilla latte with extra vanilla.
49. Say something totally random about you?
i am a collector. i collect everything.
50. Has anyone ever said you looked like a celebrity?
nope.
51. How old are you?
26 in a little less than a month.
52. Do you wear a watch?
yes.
53. Do you have anything pierced?
my ears
54. Do you have any tattoos?
no.
55. Do you like pain?
yes.
56. Do you like to shop?
yes, except for clothes.
57. What was the last thing you paid for with cash?
my bagel this morning.
58. What was the last thing you paid for with a credit card?
does debit count? because i bought my groceries with my debit card earlier tonight.
59. Who was the last person you spoke to on the phone?
linds (before she bailed on me for mojo, LOL!)
60. What is on your desktop background?
this beautiful background of jim & pam from the season finale of the office.
61. Do you like redheads?
yes.
62. Do you know any twins?
no.
63. Do you have any weird relatives?
yes.
64. What was the last movie you watched?
shattered glass last night.
65. What was the last book you read?
i'm still in the middle of please kill me.
66. Did you or do you go to college?
been there, done that.
67. What is your favorite pair of pants that you own?
i heart my jeans.
68. What is your favorite day of the week?
saturday.
69. What are you going to do after you answer this question?
go to bed, god willing.