Questionnaire for High Council Peer Review: D. Summers
Okay, I wanted to promise that I won't spam your flist with any more of these, but I have a 12-page Eliot paper that I haven't started the research on yet and I really need to procrastinate. Also, nemo_gravis encouraged doing characters that were already taken and lwbush wrote happy fun-loving Dawn and while I love that Dawn, we all know that my Dawn is somewhat darker, so I thought this would make an interest contrast. I'm thinking this is happening sometime in 2004, shortly after she joined the High Council in my Watcher!verse.
To: rpryce@watcher.gov.uk; rgiles@watcher.gov.uk; lchalmers@watcher.gov.uk
From: dsummers@watcher.gov.uk
Subject: Re: Questionnaire for High Council Peer Review
______________________
1. DO YOU SNORE?
I've never really shared a bed with anyone who would mention it. No, wait--there were the Potentials, weren't there? They would certainly have told me if I snored, so I guess I don't.
2. ARE YOU A LOVER OR A FIGHTER?
Neither. I help the fighters to make the world safe for the lovers.
3. WHAT'S YOUR WORST FEAR?
Getting people killed through my incompetency. It's a fear I faced many, many times, and I still continue to make mistakes that cost girls their lives. It's not getting easier, though, thank God.
4. AS A KID, WERE YOU A LEGO MANIAC?
I loved legos. I'd make elaborate castles and spaceships and all sorts of things. I tried to get Buffy to play with me but she always pretended she was too old for that sort of stuff. Once when I was three Celia played with me but then she died.
5. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF "REALITY" TV?
Low-brow and degrading. Which makes it incredible fun to watch. Sharon's way too nice on Pop Idol.
6. DO YOU CHEW ON YOUR STRAWS?
Sometimes.
7. WERE YOU A CUTE BABY?
I've seen the pictures and yes. Buffy denies it, though.
8. IS THE SINGLE LIFE FOR YOU?
Sometimes I wonder if I will always be alone. In a sense, I always have been.
9. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR KEYBOARD?
Black.
10. DO YOU SING IN THE SHOWER?
I'm somewhat disturbed that a British old person (not that you're old, Giles) is asking me about what I do in the shower. But sometimes, yes.
11. HAVE YOU EVER BUNGEE JUMPED?
No. I was atop a large tower as it plummeted to the ground, though.
12. ANY SECRET TALENTS?
None. All my talents are public knowledge. I can teleport. And Ethan said I was okay in bed, too.
13. WHAT'S YOUR IDEAL VACATION SPOT?
Rome was nice, but civilization sort of acts as a magnet for demons. You can't even go shopping in peace. I'd like to spend a vacation in a small villa in the middle of nowhere.
14. IS JAY LENO FUNNY?
Xander's funnier. Beatrice thinks he's hot (Leno, not Xander), which I find disturbing.
15. CAN YOU SWIM?
Yes. Buffy and I both got swimming lessons. Up until she was 15, I could swim faster than her, even.
16. HAVE YOU SEEN THE MOVIE "DONNIE DARKO"?
Yeah. That was cool. Even if it was all wrong.
17. DO YOU GIVE A DAMN ABOUT THE OZONE?
In theory. In practice, demons demand my attention.
18. HOW MANY LICKS DOES IT TAKE TO GET TO THE CENTER OF A TOOTSIE ROLL POP?
326. Janice and I tried it once.
19. CAN YOU SING THE ALPHABET BACKWARDS?
Certainly.
20. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON AN AIRPLANE?
Whenever I fly back and forth between Rome and London to take care of Council business. Teleporting knocks me out. I'm not Willow.
21. ARE YOU AN ONLY CHILD?
If it weren't for my older sister, I wouldn't be where I am today. In oh so many ways.
22. DO YOU PREFER ELECTRIC OR MANUAL PENCIL SHARPENER?
Electric. The less time I spend sharpening my pencil the more time I can spend sending girls to their deaths. I'm not bitter.
23. WHAT'S YOUR STAND ON HUNTING?
Against it. If it's not harming you, don't harm it. If it's hurting people, send a bunch of Slayers to kick its ass and kill it into next week.
24. IS MARRIAGE IN YOUR FUTURE?
The closest thing I've had to a relationship was a one-night stand in Brazil. So I don't think so.
25. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
I remember when I was kid, I was in love with my handwriting, making it as girly as possible as I wrote my diary entries. Then I burned my diaries.
26. WHAT ARE YOU ALLERGIC TO?
Novacaine. Marcaine. Cocaine too, probably, though I've never tried it.
27. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SAID, "I LOVE YOU"?
To my sister, when I last left Rome.
28. IS ELVIS STILL ALIVE?
The evidence is inconclusive, but the Tradëscan Codex includes a few passages which support that conclusion.
29. DO YOU CRY AT WEDDINGS?
Yes, but not enough that anyone else can notice. It seems such a brave act, knowing what we know about the world.
30. HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR EGGS?
Scrambled, with cheese and ham and just a hint of mustard.
31. ARE BLONDES DUMB?
Some, like Harmony, are. Some, like Lydia, aren't. Buffy isn't a real blonde anyway, so she doesn't count.
32. WHERE DOES THE OTHER SOCK END UP?
Jg’areq, Third Hell of the Demon Ysharok. I'm trying to talk Faith, Kim, and Beatrice to go on a sock-hunting expedition one of these days.
33. WHAT TIME IS IT?
Midnight.
34. DO YOU HAVE A NICKNAME?
Most people in the Council, Slayers or Watchers, call me either "Dawn" or "Miss Summers" depending on how well they know me. The Scoobies sometimes call me "Dawnie."
35. IS MCDONALD'S DISGUSTING?
No. Which one of you penned that slur?
36. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WERE IN A CAR, AND WHO WERE YOU WITH?
That sporty two-door I used to break Ethan out of prison.
37. DO YOU PREFER BATHS OR SHOWERS?
Baths. The only luxury I allow myself.
38. IS SANTA CLAUS REAL?
According to the most complete Council records, there are three demons who are sometimes associated with Santa Claus. But of course there's a real Santa Claus, and he doesn't disembowel children. This is the case because I say so. Being a High Watcher should count for something.
39. DO YOU LIKE TO HAVE YOUR NECK KISSED?
Yes.
40. ARE YOU AFRAID OF THE DARK?
Sometimes I think I should be, but I'm not. I've learned to respect the dark, however.
41. WHAT ARE YOU ADDICTED TO?
At the moment, nothing, except maybe work. I have an addictive personality, though.
42. CRUNCHY OR CREAMY PEANUT BUTTER?
Chunky.
43. CAN YOU CRACK YOUR NECK?
Yes.
44. HAVE YOU EVER RIDDEN IN AN AMBULANCE?
Too many times since I've become a Watcher. And I don't even do that much field work, and Beatrice's careful.
45. HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU BRUSHED YOUR TEETH TODAY?
Three times.
46. IS DRUG FREE THE WAY TO BE?
If it wasn't so important that I remain lucid, I know I would want to escape from reality.
47. ARE YOU A HEAVY SLEEPER?
Buffy tells me that I've slept through apocalypses before. So I suppose so. I know that I could never fall asleep with the Potentials around, though.
48. WHAT COLOR ARE YOUR EYES?
Blue.
50. DO YOU LIKE YOUR LIFE?
I try not to ask myself that question.
51. DO YOU HAVE ANY TATTOOS OR PIERCINGS?
My ears are pierced. Further this respondant sayeth not.
52. ARE YOU PSYCHIC?
No.
53. HAVE YOU READ "CATCHER IN THE RYE"?
Of course. HAsn't everyone?
54. DO YOU PLAY ANY INSTRUMENTS?
Once my parents tried to get me violin lessons but that was sort of a disaster.
55. HAVE YOU EVER STOLEN MONEY?
I have stolen many things in my time, but not money. If our budget problems keep on like this, though, I might get Faith to rob a bank.
56. CAN YOU SNOWBOARD?
No.
57. DO YOU LIKE CAMPING?
Camping's fun when you're with friends. I remember once Dad took me and Buffy camping, and it was a lot of fun. Buffy hated it.
58. DO YOU SNORT WHEN YOU LAUGH?
I don't think I've laughed since Brazil.
59. DO YOU BELIEVE IN MAGIC?
I continue to entertain the hypothesis that we are all just an insane hallucination of Buffy's.
60. ARE DOGS A MAN'S BEST FRIEND?
I think I'd be more of a cat person, if I had time for pets.
61. YOU BELIEVE IN DIVORCE?
Sometimes two people are better off not together.
62. CAN YOU DO THE MOONWALK?
Yes.
63. DO YOU MAKE MANY MISTAKES?
Do you want me to list them? Maybe we could visit the Watcher's Ceremony in Richmond and I could point them out to you.
64. IS IT COLD OUTSIDE TODAY?
I'm from Southern California. The UK is cold, for spring at least. I'm sure Buffy's nice and warm.
65. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?
A panini from Benjy's. Chicken, cheese, and barbeque sauce. Now that's a sandwich.
66. DO YOU WEAR NAIL POLISH?
Not everyday, but when I want to look pretty.
67. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN KISSED?
Yes.
68. WHAT'S THE MOST ANNOYING TV COMMERCIAL?
All British commercials are weird. And you guys don't know where to put commercial breaks either. Seriously.
69. DO YOU SHOP AT AMERICAN EAGLE?
Do they have those in Europe?
70. FAVORITE BAND AT THE MOMENT?
R.E.M.
Dawn Summers, High Council
c/o Watcher’s Council of Britain
99c Great Russell Street
London, WC1B 3LA
Phone: 020 7123 4567
E-mail: dsummers@watcher.gov.uk
To: rpryce@watcher.gov.uk; rgiles@watcher.gov.uk; lchalmers@watcher.gov.uk
From: dsummers@watcher.gov.uk
Subject: Re: Questionnaire for High Council Peer Review
______________________
1. DO YOU SNORE?
I've never really shared a bed with anyone who would mention it. No, wait--there were the Potentials, weren't there? They would certainly have told me if I snored, so I guess I don't.
2. ARE YOU A LOVER OR A FIGHTER?
Neither. I help the fighters to make the world safe for the lovers.
3. WHAT'S YOUR WORST FEAR?
Getting people killed through my incompetency. It's a fear I faced many, many times, and I still continue to make mistakes that cost girls their lives. It's not getting easier, though, thank God.
4. AS A KID, WERE YOU A LEGO MANIAC?
I loved legos. I'd make elaborate castles and spaceships and all sorts of things. I tried to get Buffy to play with me but she always pretended she was too old for that sort of stuff. Once when I was three Celia played with me but then she died.
5. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF "REALITY" TV?
Low-brow and degrading. Which makes it incredible fun to watch. Sharon's way too nice on Pop Idol.
6. DO YOU CHEW ON YOUR STRAWS?
Sometimes.
7. WERE YOU A CUTE BABY?
I've seen the pictures and yes. Buffy denies it, though.
8. IS THE SINGLE LIFE FOR YOU?
Sometimes I wonder if I will always be alone. In a sense, I always have been.
9. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR KEYBOARD?
Black.
10. DO YOU SING IN THE SHOWER?
I'm somewhat disturbed that a British old person (not that you're old, Giles) is asking me about what I do in the shower. But sometimes, yes.
11. HAVE YOU EVER BUNGEE JUMPED?
No. I was atop a large tower as it plummeted to the ground, though.
12. ANY SECRET TALENTS?
None. All my talents are public knowledge. I can teleport. And Ethan said I was okay in bed, too.
13. WHAT'S YOUR IDEAL VACATION SPOT?
Rome was nice, but civilization sort of acts as a magnet for demons. You can't even go shopping in peace. I'd like to spend a vacation in a small villa in the middle of nowhere.
14. IS JAY LENO FUNNY?
Xander's funnier. Beatrice thinks he's hot (Leno, not Xander), which I find disturbing.
15. CAN YOU SWIM?
Yes. Buffy and I both got swimming lessons. Up until she was 15, I could swim faster than her, even.
16. HAVE YOU SEEN THE MOVIE "DONNIE DARKO"?
Yeah. That was cool. Even if it was all wrong.
17. DO YOU GIVE A DAMN ABOUT THE OZONE?
In theory. In practice, demons demand my attention.
18. HOW MANY LICKS DOES IT TAKE TO GET TO THE CENTER OF A TOOTSIE ROLL POP?
326. Janice and I tried it once.
19. CAN YOU SING THE ALPHABET BACKWARDS?
Certainly.
20. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON AN AIRPLANE?
Whenever I fly back and forth between Rome and London to take care of Council business. Teleporting knocks me out. I'm not Willow.
21. ARE YOU AN ONLY CHILD?
If it weren't for my older sister, I wouldn't be where I am today. In oh so many ways.
22. DO YOU PREFER ELECTRIC OR MANUAL PENCIL SHARPENER?
Electric. The less time I spend sharpening my pencil the more time I can spend sending girls to their deaths. I'm not bitter.
23. WHAT'S YOUR STAND ON HUNTING?
Against it. If it's not harming you, don't harm it. If it's hurting people, send a bunch of Slayers to kick its ass and kill it into next week.
24. IS MARRIAGE IN YOUR FUTURE?
The closest thing I've had to a relationship was a one-night stand in Brazil. So I don't think so.
25. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
I remember when I was kid, I was in love with my handwriting, making it as girly as possible as I wrote my diary entries. Then I burned my diaries.
26. WHAT ARE YOU ALLERGIC TO?
Novacaine. Marcaine. Cocaine too, probably, though I've never tried it.
27. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SAID, "I LOVE YOU"?
To my sister, when I last left Rome.
28. IS ELVIS STILL ALIVE?
The evidence is inconclusive, but the Tradëscan Codex includes a few passages which support that conclusion.
29. DO YOU CRY AT WEDDINGS?
Yes, but not enough that anyone else can notice. It seems such a brave act, knowing what we know about the world.
30. HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR EGGS?
Scrambled, with cheese and ham and just a hint of mustard.
31. ARE BLONDES DUMB?
Some, like Harmony, are. Some, like Lydia, aren't. Buffy isn't a real blonde anyway, so she doesn't count.
32. WHERE DOES THE OTHER SOCK END UP?
Jg’areq, Third Hell of the Demon Ysharok. I'm trying to talk Faith, Kim, and Beatrice to go on a sock-hunting expedition one of these days.
33. WHAT TIME IS IT?
Midnight.
34. DO YOU HAVE A NICKNAME?
Most people in the Council, Slayers or Watchers, call me either "Dawn" or "Miss Summers" depending on how well they know me. The Scoobies sometimes call me "Dawnie."
35. IS MCDONALD'S DISGUSTING?
No. Which one of you penned that slur?
36. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WERE IN A CAR, AND WHO WERE YOU WITH?
That sporty two-door I used to break Ethan out of prison.
37. DO YOU PREFER BATHS OR SHOWERS?
Baths. The only luxury I allow myself.
38. IS SANTA CLAUS REAL?
According to the most complete Council records, there are three demons who are sometimes associated with Santa Claus. But of course there's a real Santa Claus, and he doesn't disembowel children. This is the case because I say so. Being a High Watcher should count for something.
39. DO YOU LIKE TO HAVE YOUR NECK KISSED?
Yes.
40. ARE YOU AFRAID OF THE DARK?
Sometimes I think I should be, but I'm not. I've learned to respect the dark, however.
41. WHAT ARE YOU ADDICTED TO?
At the moment, nothing, except maybe work. I have an addictive personality, though.
42. CRUNCHY OR CREAMY PEANUT BUTTER?
Chunky.
43. CAN YOU CRACK YOUR NECK?
Yes.
44. HAVE YOU EVER RIDDEN IN AN AMBULANCE?
Too many times since I've become a Watcher. And I don't even do that much field work, and Beatrice's careful.
45. HOW MANY TIMES HAVE YOU BRUSHED YOUR TEETH TODAY?
Three times.
46. IS DRUG FREE THE WAY TO BE?
If it wasn't so important that I remain lucid, I know I would want to escape from reality.
47. ARE YOU A HEAVY SLEEPER?
Buffy tells me that I've slept through apocalypses before. So I suppose so. I know that I could never fall asleep with the Potentials around, though.
48. WHAT COLOR ARE YOUR EYES?
Blue.
50. DO YOU LIKE YOUR LIFE?
I try not to ask myself that question.
51. DO YOU HAVE ANY TATTOOS OR PIERCINGS?
My ears are pierced. Further this respondant sayeth not.
52. ARE YOU PSYCHIC?
No.
53. HAVE YOU READ "CATCHER IN THE RYE"?
Of course. HAsn't everyone?
54. DO YOU PLAY ANY INSTRUMENTS?
Once my parents tried to get me violin lessons but that was sort of a disaster.
55. HAVE YOU EVER STOLEN MONEY?
I have stolen many things in my time, but not money. If our budget problems keep on like this, though, I might get Faith to rob a bank.
56. CAN YOU SNOWBOARD?
No.
57. DO YOU LIKE CAMPING?
Camping's fun when you're with friends. I remember once Dad took me and Buffy camping, and it was a lot of fun. Buffy hated it.
58. DO YOU SNORT WHEN YOU LAUGH?
I don't think I've laughed since Brazil.
59. DO YOU BELIEVE IN MAGIC?
I continue to entertain the hypothesis that we are all just an insane hallucination of Buffy's.
60. ARE DOGS A MAN'S BEST FRIEND?
I think I'd be more of a cat person, if I had time for pets.
61. YOU BELIEVE IN DIVORCE?
Sometimes two people are better off not together.
62. CAN YOU DO THE MOONWALK?
Yes.
63. DO YOU MAKE MANY MISTAKES?
Do you want me to list them? Maybe we could visit the Watcher's Ceremony in Richmond and I could point them out to you.
64. IS IT COLD OUTSIDE TODAY?
I'm from Southern California. The UK is cold, for spring at least. I'm sure Buffy's nice and warm.
65. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?
A panini from Benjy's. Chicken, cheese, and barbeque sauce. Now that's a sandwich.
66. DO YOU WEAR NAIL POLISH?
Not everyday, but when I want to look pretty.
67. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN KISSED?
Yes.
68. WHAT'S THE MOST ANNOYING TV COMMERCIAL?
All British commercials are weird. And you guys don't know where to put commercial breaks either. Seriously.
69. DO YOU SHOP AT AMERICAN EAGLE?
Do they have those in Europe?
70. FAVORITE BAND AT THE MOMENT?
R.E.M.
Dawn Summers, High Council
c/o Watcher’s Council of Britain
99c Great Russell Street
London, WC1B 3LA
Phone: 020 7123 4567
E-mail: dsummers@watcher.gov.uk