On behalf of some friends
My pals Dan and Dorothy wrote a book, and it's out today. It's called Dating Makes You Want To Die (But You Have to Do it Anyway). Yes, it's a dating book, but no, it's not really anything like The Rules or He's Just Not That Into You. It's a humor book, and while clearly I'm not unbiased, I say it's a pretty damn funny read. I know a lot of hilarious people (sometimes just because they accidentally set their own hair on fire, but still: funny folks); these two are among the wittiest.
So keep it in mind for all your future library-borrowing, subway-reading, funny-gift-giving needs. A sample quote:
Before she wound up a mumbling, pill-infested talking puppet on the world's most successful television show ever, Paula Abdul once asked, "Straight up now tell me are you really going to love me forever? Oh, oh, oh." Emilio Estevez answered, "No." But at least Paula had the balls to ask.
Yes, friends, I will do the same for you when you write a masterpiece and it includes the line "And if that doesn't work, slip them a roofie." (In a chapter titled "We are in love," natch.) I'll tell everyone to buy it soo you become a millionaire, so then you can buy me drinks in gratitude.