Tsubasa: Twenty Years Of Warmth

Mar 01, 2008 02:06

Title: Twenty Years Of Warmth
Author: papered
Fandom: Tsubasa
Characters/Pairing: Yukito, Touya/Yukito
Rating: PG
Word Count: 2660
Summary: Once upon a time: the story of how the prince and the future High Priest met.
Notes: I thought it would be interesting to write these two in the TRC-verse rather than the usual CCS one. :) Happy Belated Bday, Touya!


I.

True friendship comes when the silence between two people is comfortable.
- David Tyson Gentry

The first time Yukito had laid eyes on Touya, he'd been five years old.

Being the only son of a low-ranking Advisor, he'd only had access to the outermost sections of the castle, and yet being a noble-born, he couldn't leave the castle itself without permission. His mother passing away when he'd only been three, Yukito had been a lonely child, often envious of the children of the castle guards who were allowed to run free outside. There were the offspring of the other Advisors too, of course, but with his quiet and introverted personality, the few children who were around tended to prefer each other's company over his. And so he'd spent much of his childhood wandering the long corridors of the sections of the castle he was allowed in.

It was during one of these excursions that he'd run into another boy, the same age as him. Yukito had been puzzled at first, having never seen this dark-haired boy before, but had quickly dismissed his thoughts, thinking that this must be the son of an Advisor from another rank who'd managed to wander into the outer sections of the castle.

"Excuse me, but do you need any help? You seem a little lost."

The boy had shaken his head, looking amused by his offer, although why, Yukito hadn't been able to figure out.

"I'm Yukito, by the way. I haven't seen you around before."

A shrug. "I don't come to this part of the castle often. I'm Touya."

That had been proof enough for Yukito that this boy must be from a different rank, although which one, he hadn't been able to tell. Touya had worn none of the brooches and jewellery that the children of noblemen favoured, but the simple yet tasteful cut of his robes had hinted of a higher rank.

They'd had spent the day together, both having nothing better to do, and to Yukito's surprise, he and Touya got along well. The dark-haired boy favoured silence over chatter, which had suited Yukito just fine.

It hadn't taken long before the two of them decided to get together more often. Touya usually had to run off to attend lessons sometime during the day (which he was rather tight-lipped about, Yukito had noticed) but they met up as much as they could.

As they grew a older, their adventures became a little more daring. The first time Touya had suggested sneaking out of the castle, Yukito had been terrified - but he'd gone along, adrenalin pumping as they found ways to get past the castle guards. They'd come back late at night, laughing, somehow managing to make it in without getting caught.

And so Yukito's life became more interesting.

II.

Kisses are a better fate than wisdom.
- E.E. Cummings

The first time Yukito kissed another person, he'd been fourteen.

Touya had been getting busier and busier over the years, he'd noticed, but since the dark-haired boy never chose to divulge any information, he'd never pushed. The two of them were as close as ever though.

His friend was different than anyone he'd ever met. There was something about him, an intensity that was clearly noticeable. Yukito mused that he could feel Touya's approach at any time, even with his eyes closed, for the air itself seemed to shift when the dark-haired boy was around. And it was still a mystery to him, how anyone as quiet as Touya could be so strong-willed and stubborn.

It had been perfectly natural, the time they'd into one of the higher towers in the castle to watch the winter solstice fireworks from the windows (Yukito had been uncertain, since the towers were reserved for the Kings' Advisors only, but Touya had dragged him along before he could protest too much), for Yukito to lean over and brushed his lips to that of the taller boy's.

He'd pulled back as soon as he'd done so, whatever certainty he'd felt vanishing as he wondered if he'd crossed a boundary - but the other had only stepped forward, closer, and Yukito had found himself kissing Touya a second time, the pressure against his lips long and full and sweet.

They'd stood there under the fireworks for a small eternity, until the sound of approaching footsteps from the base of the towers had interrupted them. How they'd made it out without getting caught, Yukito would never know, but somehow, Touya had gotten them out, leading him through a hidden door that had been behind the curtains.

Needless to say, by the time Yukito made it back to his rooms, his heart had been pounding.

III.

We tell lies when we are afraid... afraid of what we don't know, afraid of what others will think,
afraid of what will be found out about us. But every time we tell a lie, the thing that we fear grows stronger.
- Tad Williams

"Are you sure you're okay with this, Yuki? We can just watch from the castle again instead."

It's been exactly three years since the day they'd first sneaked up into the tower, but today - tonight, the two of them had another plan. Instead of watching the annual fireworks from the windows, they would sneak out to the center of the city where the crowds would be gathered. Yukito had felt slightly queasy at first, certain that they would never made it out unseen, but his friend had been quick to reassure. And even now, he was being given a chance to back out of this.

"I'm sure," he said, giving Touya a smile. "So let's hear it. What's your brilliant plan to get us out of here?"

*

The fireworks began with a bright explosion of red and yellow, and Yukito sighed contently as he leaned against the tree, his friend next to him. Around them, the crowd cheered loudly.

Touya had led them through a series of passageways Yukito had never known to exist before. It was odd, in a way. He'd always thought that he himself knew the winding corridors well, having been wandering through them since he'd been a toddler - but the dark-haired boy literally seemed to know every nook and cranny, every hidden tunnel and staircase.

He'd teasingly asked how Touya knew the ancient castle so well, but instead of teasing back, his friend had fallen silent. Yukito had dropped the obviously uncomfortable subject quickly, but he couldn't help but be curious.

Another purple hue lit up the sky with a bang, and he forgot about his musings before long.

*

It started raining on the way back. Not just raining, but pouring. Since it rained so rarely in Clow Country, Yukito didn't even own a rainproof cloak - and even if he had, he wouldn't have brought it with him.

"We should run," Touya said. "It'll get us back faster, at any rate."

Yukito nodded, shivering slightly. Within a few minutes, he found himself soaked to the bone.

Unexpectedly, he felt something heavy settle around his shoulders, and looking up, he saw that Touya had given him his cloak. "Mine's rainproof," the dark-haired boy explained casually. "You'll catch a cold otherwise."

"What about you?" Yukito protested feebly.

"I'll be fine - what's a little rain?" Touya gave him a teasing smirk. "You need it more than me anyway, being so frail and all."

Knowing that the other boy was just trying to make him feel better, Yukito sighed and wrapped the cloak tighter around his shoulders.

They made it back by two in the morning, sneaking in the same way they'd gotten out. Yukito handed Touya back his cloak, shivering at an unexpected draft. "Thanks for this, Touya. I'd better get back."

"Don't be ridiculous, Yuki. Your rooms are all the way on the other side of the castle - you'll get sick for sure if you walk all this way soaking wet. My rooms are closer - you can take a shower and change your clothing first before going. I can lend you something."

He'd protested, of course, not wanting to bother his friend this late, but Touya could certainly be insistent when he wanted to be. Before long, he found himself ushered into warm quarters.

He'd never been to Touya's rooms before - in fact, he still didn't know what rank his friend's family was - but looking at the space he found himself in, Yukito knew that his initial impression from all those years ago had been correct. The quarters were decorated with tasteful and obviously expensive furniture, the walls heavy with foreign paintings and tapestries. Yukito thought that he'd never seen such elegant rooms. Whoever Touya's father was, he had be high-ranking indeed - perhaps even a direct Advisor of the King.

Seeing that his friend looked slightly uncomfortable, Yukito kept whatever observations he'd been about to make to himself. He was just being led to the bathroom when a voice interrupted them.

"Your Highness! What are you doing up at this hour?"

Yukito froze, knowing that they were caught. He'd known that coming with Touya would be pushing his luck - he should have gone straight to his rooms after they'd gotten back.

Wringing his hands in panic, he didn't register the words until a full twenty seconds later.

Your Highness?

Yukito looked up at Touya, expecting the boy to burst out laughing at the ridiculous title, to reassure him that they'd been mistaken for someone else.

His friend's dark eyes were unreadable, watching his expression.

The maid who'd discovered them continued on, not noticing Yukito's shock. "And you're drenched too! You'll get a cold if you're not careful, Prince Touya! And what would Her Majesty say if she knew you were sneaking out again?" She walked towards them, towel already in hand. "And who's your friend?"

Yukito didn't hear anything she said, past two words.

Prince Touya.

Prince Touya.

The syllables rang in his ears, somehow sounding foreign. His heart thudding in his chest, he looked up at the boy he'd spent so many years with, without knowing, without realizing -

The blood pounded in his head. How was this possible? How could this be happening?

He had to leave. Now.

As if burned, he pulled away suddenly, dashing in the direction of the doors like he had a hound of wolves chasing after him.

He didn't even hear Touya calling out his name behind him.

IV.

There is no disguise which can hide love for long where it exists, or simulate it where it does not.
- La Rochefoucauld

For the following days, Yukito locked himself in, not leaving his rooms unless it was strictly necessary. He had to think, and if he could stay out of Touya's way while doing it, then all the better.

All this time. And I didn't even suspect.

How was it that, in his whole life, Yukito had never actually heard the first name of the prince? When the noblemen talked, it was always "His Highness" or "the Prince" - all titles, and never the name itself.

Over the years, Touya had become his best friend. It had seemed so natural to be casual with the serious boy, but now, knowing what he did, Yukito could only wince at his own informality. From day one, he'd been calling the prince by his first name. What would his father say if he found out?

It wasn't proper for princes to associate with the sons of lowly nobles who were barely Advisors, after all.

And that wasn't all he'd done. Oh no, being on first name terms was only the least of his crimes. He'd teased and laughed with the boy on good days, annoyed and poked at him on bad ones. And on top of that, he'd gone and kissed the prince. The Queen herself most likely didn't act with such familiarity towards her son.

The way Yukito saw it, there was only one solution to this. It was too late to change what he'd done, but he could stay out of the way from now on.

He managed to avoid Touya for a whole two weeks. Knowing how stubborn the dark-haired boy was, that in itself was quite an accomplishment.

He couldn't sidestep the boy any longer though, when one day, Touya literally showed up at his door.

He could hardly stop him if the future King wanted to come in, after all.

"I'm very sorry, Your Highness," he blurted out after fumbling with the tea. "I didn't know - I mean, I didn't - Please accept my apologies." His words stumbled over his lips in his nervousness.

"Apologies? Your Highness?" He could hear the surprise in the smooth voice, but didn't look up. "Yuki, what are you talking about?"

Yukito kept his eyes lowered, not daring to meet those dark eyes. Not only would it be immensely rude, he was sure that whatever little control he had over himself would come crashing down if he did. "I'm sorry for being so informal with you for all these years, Your Highness."

Others might not have realized it, but to Yukito, who'd known this boy for over half his life, the hint of hurt was obvious. "Yuki, I thought we were friends."

"T -" He barely stopped the familiar name from slipping out. "It isn't allowed for princes to be so familiar with people like me."

"Yuki. Don't do this."

His throat closed up at the quiet desperation he could hear in the tone. In all the years he'd known the boy, he'd never heard Touya sound like this before.

But what could he do? As much as he wanted to, he couldn't give in. How could someone like him be allowed to associate with royalty?

He stumbled back when he felt Touya suddenly stand up, walking backwards until he was against a wall, trapped. Keeping his eyes on the ground, he felt the other's approach, heard the riding boots clicking against the stone floor.

"Yukito. Look at me."

He hesitated, his heart thudding against his ribcage as if he'd been running a marathon. And before he could find a way to get out of the situation, a hand found its way under his chin, pushing up and forcing him to meet those dark eyes.

"All my life, people have treated me like I'm made out of glass - except for you. You're not afraid to laugh at me, to contradict me when you think I'm wrong. I didn't want to ruin that by telling you who I was." A paused. "But I should have. I'm sorry."

"Your Highness, I -"

Whatever protests he'd been about to voice was silenced against the finger that was pressed against his mouth.

"No, Yuki. It's Touya. In public, there might be no choice, but I don't want to hear keigo* or titles when we're alone - not from you." Those shadowed eyes bore into his own, honest but intense. "Not ever."

And any resistance he'd felt died against the soft pressure of Touya's lips against his own.

V.

If you want to be happy, be.
- Leo Tolstoy

"And now, I appoint you, Yukito, as the High Priest of Clow Country."

Yukito rose at the words, reaching out to accept the silver robes that signified his new position. He could feel Touya's gaze following his every movement, and his nervousness was curbed slightly, knowing who was waiting for him after the ceremony was over.

When he moved into the High Priest's quarters (located in the same wing as the King's) two days later, Yukito mused that Touya had been right all along.

He'd had his doubts over the years, but in the end, everything really had worked out for the best. Settling his things down, Yukito smiled as he felt long arms encircle him from behind.

And as long as he was with Touya, he was sure that things would be all right from here on out.

Finis.

*keigo: The Japanese has many honorifics, parts of speech which show respect, and their use is mandatory in many social situations. Honorifics in Japanese are broadly referred to as keigo. - from wikipedia

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tsubasa: touya/yukito, !fandom: tsubasa, tsubasa: yukito pov, category: slash

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