Scripture singing and i can't find my way home
It's been years... Life has been good. Read through this entire blog last night.
For all those ex's that called me lazy, crazy, and self harming: I found out why my lymphnodes were so swollen and my behavior so erratic. I have this auto immune disease called hashimotos. It explains my miscarriages and crazyness that followed each one. The hormone fluxuations were literally killing me and eating my thyroid, brain, and joints. And fuck those doctors the convinced me I was bipolar... I am not.
Thank god for my amazing husband. Our five year wedding anniversary is this summer. We live a normal life, have a house, kid, four dogs, and a fish. Sometimes i get drunk and say and do crazy shit, but unlike those who couldn't handle my crass behavior, he loves me. Unconditionally, and for who i am he loves me. Our sex is amazing, but it isn't the only driving force. We are friends. Best friends forever. So this tragedy has become an epic love story.
I am not America's Sweetheart and i never will be, but i am his sweetheart which is all that matters. We don't fight, and when we do therebis no screaming, no mean things that can't be taken back. I am adulting and i am pretty good at it.
I've built my own empire, i am back in school, and i am writing a novel. If you read it and recognize my style... Shhh. I want to pretend my past life is fiction or a world away.