(no subject)
i remember the first time we talked. the silly
words you'd use. how you'd say the sweetest things to me. how you told
me i was the most beautiful girl you'd ever seen. how you called me all
the cute names. how when i was afraid, you'd comfort me. if i was
upset, you'd cheer me up. the way we would talk on the phone for hours
on end. when my parents weren't home, we'd talk on the phone until i
fell asleep. or until you did. and listening to you breath, it was
amazing. it was perfect. i remember waking up in the morning and we'd
STILL be on the phone. how you'd never hang up on me and it made me
feel like i was the most important girl in your eyes. and that's all
that matter, i didn't care what my friends thought, because i always
had you, and you always had me. you were my BEST FRIEND, i could tell
you everything. i trusted you more than i had trusted
anyone in the whole entire world. we had hundreds upon hundreds of
jokes. i remember the first time you ever said i love you. and how i
felt when you said it. amazed you felt the same way as me. i loved the
way you shuffled your feet nervously around me at first, but in time we
were so comfortable together, being apart never seemed right. if we did
fight, by the end of the conversation we'd make up and be so inlove
again. i love how you could call me at 5 in the morning and wake me up,
and despite the fact i was half asleep, i was the happiest girl on the
face of the earth. i love how your profile online always
said my name in it, whether it was "i love you" before, or just my
name. it let me know you cared, and that was the most important thing
to me. i sat online and waited for a buddy alert to pop up saying you'd
signed online. i even had a special song playing when you signed on,
all because i loved you. i dragged myself out of bed each and every
morning to go to school, just to see you.
but it's not like anymore, you've moved on. and i've tried to. and i have, but each and everytime when it doesn't work out for me, i ask myself, why the hell did i have to mess this up? even as i sit here now, i'm crying. because it's over. i miss you. and even though i still love you, i know you're never going to feel that way again. even us still being friends leaves me crying myself to sleep, asking myself why i was so stupid. i miss you.
but it's not like anymore, you've moved on. and i've tried to. and i have, but each and everytime when it doesn't work out for me, i ask myself, why the hell did i have to mess this up? even as i sit here now, i'm crying. because it's over. i miss you. and even though i still love you, i know you're never going to feel that way again. even us still being friends leaves me crying myself to sleep, asking myself why i was so stupid. i miss you.