Veinte
Wolverine's gone. Holy crap, a universe completely devoid of Wolverine-- how often does this happen? Does this mean we can stay out after curfew and bring beer to our parties on school nights again?
And Layla's gone. I would add more to this but it would be completely rude and callous and I'm too lazy to argue about it with incredibly self-righteous people right now.
Madrox. Want to go get a beer? I know a place with a foosball table.
[private | hackable with moderate skill]
This isn't a diary. I don't do diaries. But I gotta get some crap off my chest, because it's finally starting to feel like I can breath again, and the last thing I want is to make myself start drowning. Things are finally turning up for me. Part of me feels like I deserve it after all the endless crap that's been my life lately.
I have who I am back. I have a girl I think I could learn to love, even if she's not-- you know what, I'm not even gonna think about it. I've known Rahne almost my whole life and I've opened myself up to her totally three times and I've been as receptive as I could and all I've gotten out of it was pain and her telling me no because she doesn't think I'm what she needs. She thinks she's gonna hurt me. Me. The guy who chased after Tabitha for years.
How fucked up is that?
It doesn't matter. There's a person here. Rahne is back home, and Terry, and everyone else. I need to focus on the now. The good coming my way. Layla's gone and thank God for that. I don't trust that kid, woman, lady, whatever, as far as I could throw her. Which isn't far.
Thank God for that.
But Jamie's still here. And all of this is tearing him up. Every nerve in my body says I should run the fuck away while the running is good and let him deal with his Layla issues and his other issues, because he has other people and he'll survive it. But that's not fair of me. At all. And maybe one of his sociopathic asshole dupes tried to finish what I started once, but in the end, Jamie's done nothing but given me something to look forward to when all I wanted to do was turn my head and find a hidey-hole to die in. I owe his complicated ass.
He's one of ours. I owe him. End of story.
[end private]
I have a question.
Say you know somebody, and you know this person is seriously, seriously bad for you in every way possible? Say they did you one really wrong in the past, something you can never forgive them for. But they also did you one right every time they had a chance.
Do you stick around when they need you, even if you know for certain this time you can't sympathize and it's just going to drag you down, or do you pack your bags and say sayonara?
[ooc: sorry for quietness from Ric's end! was having muse issues due to recent canon events. should be fixed now!]
And Layla's gone. I would add more to this but it would be completely rude and callous and I'm too lazy to argue about it with incredibly self-righteous people right now.
Madrox. Want to go get a beer? I know a place with a foosball table.
[private | hackable with moderate skill]
This isn't a diary. I don't do diaries. But I gotta get some crap off my chest, because it's finally starting to feel like I can breath again, and the last thing I want is to make myself start drowning. Things are finally turning up for me. Part of me feels like I deserve it after all the endless crap that's been my life lately.
I have who I am back. I have a girl I think I could learn to love, even if she's not-- you know what, I'm not even gonna think about it. I've known Rahne almost my whole life and I've opened myself up to her totally three times and I've been as receptive as I could and all I've gotten out of it was pain and her telling me no because she doesn't think I'm what she needs. She thinks she's gonna hurt me. Me. The guy who chased after Tabitha for years.
How fucked up is that?
It doesn't matter. There's a person here. Rahne is back home, and Terry, and everyone else. I need to focus on the now. The good coming my way. Layla's gone and thank God for that. I don't trust that kid, woman, lady, whatever, as far as I could throw her. Which isn't far.
Thank God for that.
But Jamie's still here. And all of this is tearing him up. Every nerve in my body says I should run the fuck away while the running is good and let him deal with his Layla issues and his other issues, because he has other people and he'll survive it. But that's not fair of me. At all. And maybe one of his sociopathic asshole dupes tried to finish what I started once, but in the end, Jamie's done nothing but given me something to look forward to when all I wanted to do was turn my head and find a hidey-hole to die in. I owe his complicated ass.
He's one of ours. I owe him. End of story.
[end private]
I have a question.
Say you know somebody, and you know this person is seriously, seriously bad for you in every way possible? Say they did you one really wrong in the past, something you can never forgive them for. But they also did you one right every time they had a chance.
Do you stick around when they need you, even if you know for certain this time you can't sympathize and it's just going to drag you down, or do you pack your bags and say sayonara?
[ooc: sorry for quietness from Ric's end! was having muse issues due to recent canon events. should be fixed now!]