(no subject)
why is it so utterly impossible to meet people online who are truly interesting? dont get me wrong, i meet people online who hold my interest but cant we sustain my being interested? i want to meet someone via bandwidth that impresses me consistently and i dont think that should be such a hard task right now when my life is so completely boring. i want to meet someone who doesnt prove to be small-minded. i want to at least meet someone who doesnt think theyre so smart when theyre really not. i want to meet someone who isnt convinced that theyre ultra unique when they are really just slightly different than the huge majority. i mean, lets at least be honest about ourselves. being sort of the same as others isnt so bad. we dont have to strive for elitism and difference because we are so afraid of common ground.
its also been bothering me that so many people who ive encountered lately are so completely lacking in information about what the fuck is going on in the world? how many of you know and remember each day that we have hit peak oil and life as we know it will be coming to an end in the very near future? how many of you still continue to plan for your stupid station wagon futures when soon enough there will be no fuel to power your station wagon and not enough food to feed your potential children? how many of you even know what the term peak oil means and sadder still... how many of you who dont know are even going to bother to look it up now? how many of you really believe that our government has troops dying and killing in iraq because sadaam hussein somehow aided in the events of 9/11? furthermore, how many of you think that we had no idea that planes were coming to hit the twin towers? how many of you know that we trained the taliban? we taught them how to fly planes and use weapons and then we taught them to hate us.
i dont think hate is an excuse for anything but this is all certainly information that you might want to be aware of in your day to day lives. i know making out at Bang and downloading music and fretting over your latest flirtation are really engaging and stimulating but how much is that stuff going to matter when our population shrinks from 6 billion to 5 million? how many of you will remember to love your friends and family before its too late?
the more i learn about the reality of the PRESENT and the incredibly near future when all of these eventuals become more apparent the more i want to fall in love, the more i want to lay in bed with someone beautiful and enigmatic and brilliant and enjoy them... the more i want to stop leaving the lights on when i sleep. the more i realize how much time i waste aone when i should be enjoying life as it is now with other people... the more i think about this the less i want to take you all for granted... the less i want to spend time thinking about small minded nonsense and drama.. but nonetheless.. the more i want to accept and embrace so much common ground that i have disregarded. some of these stuff conflicts but really.. what in life forgets to conflict?
joe is supposed to be coming to see me on friday and im supposed to be explaining to him that im moving to LA and that we probably wont ever see eachother again.. i think i would be so much nicer to have him pet my hair and kiss his fingers without thinking too hard about anything really but knowledge is supposed to be power and all of that, right? really, sometimes i think im a little nuts.. all of this stress to get to LA and the fucking daily drama and burning up the shreds of relationship i have left with my dad over some fashion dreams in LA.. the passed few days i am thinking i'd just like to take a nice boy to my mom's house so she can hug me and he can make love to me and at least i wont be paying 4 dollars a gallon for gas when everyone else in LA is.
of course, the real, less logical me want to be drinking champagne and falling in love on the weekends when gas is 4 dollars a gallon.. i want to be buying 4 dollar/gallon gas in LA and living it up big time before the living it up is over completely. i thought again about running away to europe of to singapore but i know that europe will be a HUGE mess when things are starting to get bad here and all of the millionaires in singapore cannot change the fact that singapore is an island almost completely devoid of natural resources.
la de da. at very least i hope you will all start doing some research during your hours of internet time so that you can have at least some basic need-to-know sort of knowledge of what is going on in your lives when bang is closed and your flavor of the week is gone.
its also been bothering me that so many people who ive encountered lately are so completely lacking in information about what the fuck is going on in the world? how many of you know and remember each day that we have hit peak oil and life as we know it will be coming to an end in the very near future? how many of you still continue to plan for your stupid station wagon futures when soon enough there will be no fuel to power your station wagon and not enough food to feed your potential children? how many of you even know what the term peak oil means and sadder still... how many of you who dont know are even going to bother to look it up now? how many of you really believe that our government has troops dying and killing in iraq because sadaam hussein somehow aided in the events of 9/11? furthermore, how many of you think that we had no idea that planes were coming to hit the twin towers? how many of you know that we trained the taliban? we taught them how to fly planes and use weapons and then we taught them to hate us.
i dont think hate is an excuse for anything but this is all certainly information that you might want to be aware of in your day to day lives. i know making out at Bang and downloading music and fretting over your latest flirtation are really engaging and stimulating but how much is that stuff going to matter when our population shrinks from 6 billion to 5 million? how many of you will remember to love your friends and family before its too late?
the more i learn about the reality of the PRESENT and the incredibly near future when all of these eventuals become more apparent the more i want to fall in love, the more i want to lay in bed with someone beautiful and enigmatic and brilliant and enjoy them... the more i want to stop leaving the lights on when i sleep. the more i realize how much time i waste aone when i should be enjoying life as it is now with other people... the more i think about this the less i want to take you all for granted... the less i want to spend time thinking about small minded nonsense and drama.. but nonetheless.. the more i want to accept and embrace so much common ground that i have disregarded. some of these stuff conflicts but really.. what in life forgets to conflict?
joe is supposed to be coming to see me on friday and im supposed to be explaining to him that im moving to LA and that we probably wont ever see eachother again.. i think i would be so much nicer to have him pet my hair and kiss his fingers without thinking too hard about anything really but knowledge is supposed to be power and all of that, right? really, sometimes i think im a little nuts.. all of this stress to get to LA and the fucking daily drama and burning up the shreds of relationship i have left with my dad over some fashion dreams in LA.. the passed few days i am thinking i'd just like to take a nice boy to my mom's house so she can hug me and he can make love to me and at least i wont be paying 4 dollars a gallon for gas when everyone else in LA is.
of course, the real, less logical me want to be drinking champagne and falling in love on the weekends when gas is 4 dollars a gallon.. i want to be buying 4 dollar/gallon gas in LA and living it up big time before the living it up is over completely. i thought again about running away to europe of to singapore but i know that europe will be a HUGE mess when things are starting to get bad here and all of the millionaires in singapore cannot change the fact that singapore is an island almost completely devoid of natural resources.
la de da. at very least i hope you will all start doing some research during your hours of internet time so that you can have at least some basic need-to-know sort of knowledge of what is going on in your lives when bang is closed and your flavor of the week is gone.