"I'm old," the cringiest phrase
Each and every person is presently the oldest they've ever been, which is why it's so cringe (to me, anyway) when anyone younger than 70 humble-brags about being old.
But allow me to complain about something I have aged into recently: wisdom barnacles.
They're about as gross as the brussel sprout and mothball odor that fills my house.
I really didn't plan for all these old-person stereotypes to collide into my life all at once. These past few weeks have been weirdly thematic.
BARNACLES
Yesterday I fainted for the third time in my life. A dermatologist merely touched her scrapy tool to my barnacle, and I was out. I didn't even bleed, but she gave me a bandaid anyway. I was a brave little soldier.
BRUSSEL SPROUTS
I've been buying and trying a lot of vegetables lately, as one might expect of the air fryer nouveau riche. It didn't take me long to come around to braised brussel sprouts. And now my house is a fart.
MOTHBALLS
I've had a pantry moth infestation for weeks! They migrated from the kitchen to my office where they laid eggs in the half dozen 1990s business casual jackets I have hanging there. Their breeding cycle is so quick, I had no choice but to engage in chemical warfare. The good news is those jackets were already mothball flavored when I inherited them.
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In other news, Julian and I just finished binge watching Avatar the Last Air Bender and it's sooo good! I love all the action, the quality of the animation, the storytelling. Love!
But allow me to complain about something I have aged into recently: wisdom barnacles.
They're about as gross as the brussel sprout and mothball odor that fills my house.
I really didn't plan for all these old-person stereotypes to collide into my life all at once. These past few weeks have been weirdly thematic.
BARNACLES
Yesterday I fainted for the third time in my life. A dermatologist merely touched her scrapy tool to my barnacle, and I was out. I didn't even bleed, but she gave me a bandaid anyway. I was a brave little soldier.
BRUSSEL SPROUTS
I've been buying and trying a lot of vegetables lately, as one might expect of the air fryer nouveau riche. It didn't take me long to come around to braised brussel sprouts. And now my house is a fart.
MOTHBALLS
I've had a pantry moth infestation for weeks! They migrated from the kitchen to my office where they laid eggs in the half dozen 1990s business casual jackets I have hanging there. Their breeding cycle is so quick, I had no choice but to engage in chemical warfare. The good news is those jackets were already mothball flavored when I inherited them.
-
In other news, Julian and I just finished binge watching Avatar the Last Air Bender and it's sooo good! I love all the action, the quality of the animation, the storytelling. Love!