Crackish BSG fic! Lee, Helo, & Anders
I wrote a cracky type drabble thingy for
lunar47 last week at her prompt: anders, lee, helo all comparing arms. I expanded it a little to include
spinkkitty's desire to see a certain muscled man sing.
There are also alternate endings (they're short, you'll see) featuring different BSG cast memebers, so I'm going to have my first LJ poll and ask you lovely people to vote for your favorite ending! The fun is all under the cut!
Nice Arms!
(oh, forgot, this is set in season 3 after the 'Eye of Jupiter' and 'Rapture' stuff)
Helo walked into the Head fresh from an hour-long workout, his tanks soaked through with sweat and his muscular arms glistening under the artificial light. Gods he was looking forward to a long, hot shower. He walked over to the sink and leaned down to splash some water on his face. Running his hands back through his hair, he realized he was nearly alone; he heard the stream of water from only one shower. It was strange for it to be this deserted in the afternoon, but Helo was just glad he wouldn’t have to wait in line or stick to the water ration restrictions.
Just as he looked up into the mirror, muted sounds, like singing, came wafting in with the steam. The lone bather was singing what sounded like a cheesy pop song Helo hadn’t heard since he was in school. The mystery singer wasn’t singing very loudly and probably wouldn’t be heard at all in the usually crowded Head. Helo could just make out the words and heard the chorus coming in loud and clear in falsetto tones:
“Baby, I want you locked up
I need you wrapped up
I need you by my side.
Oh, yeah, I said
Baby, I need you here with me
Want you in ecstasy
Ohh, oh, Baby
Come over tonight”
The song stopped there and the water from the shower cut off. Helo looked up as the CAG, water dripping from his hard body and clad only in a pink towel hung low around his waist, made his way over to the sinks. “Lee,” he said smiling.
"Helo," was all Lee said in return. It wasn’t cold or distant, just an acknowledgment. Helo knew they had actually become friends over the last year, especially since Lee lost the Pegasus and all that jiggle in his mid-section. Lee looked in the mirror and rubbed his fingers over his jaw as Helo just stared at him. "What?" Lee looked down at his towel. "It’s Dee’s. I couldn’t find mine." Helo grinned and Lee changed the subject. "Did you hit the bags or Hot Dog this time?"
Helo chuckled and peeled off his tanks revealing his broad, still sweat-slick chest. "Just the bags, like we talked about. You should really come down there with me sometime so we can both have a proper sparring partner. I mean, Hot Dog‘s a good kid, but Starbuck can take him out.”
"Well, she doesn’t fight fair.“ Lee looked down and smiled to himself. Aware of the pause, Lee looked up and cleared his throat. “Yeah, uh, sparring partners. That would be great. Just gotta find the time. Not easy these days."
"Yeah," Helo said sighing. "Hera’s keeping us up half the night, and Dogsville is a lot less boring than people think." Lee laughed, but Helo frowned. "Look what some kid did to me the other day." Lee took two steps towards him and Helo held out his flexed arm pointing to a long bruised cut on his large bicep.
"Frak, Karl. That’s pretty nasty," said Lee, leaning in for a closer look.
"Tell me about it. This kid throws a frakkin’ broken bottle at me and I can‘t even do anything about it. It would have hit my head too if I hadn’t seen him and deflected in time."
The hatch creaked open just then, and Anders found Lee bent over, looking intently at Helo’s arm. Sam cleared his throat and the two half-dressed men looked up with wide eyes. "You guys comparing?" Lee straightened up and they both looked stunned. "Hey, it’s cool. The guys on the pyramid circuit used to do it all the time. Why do you think our uniforms were sleeveless?"
"Hey man, we really weren't," said Helo, backing away from Lee a few steps.
“Oh, oh,” Lee nervously chuckled, “our arms. Yeah, arms. No, no we weren’t comparing.”
"No really, it’s okay. I almost want to enlist just so I’ll be issued some of those regulation tanks. I tried to put on Kara’s once. Didn’t fit. But man they make your arms look good!" The two officers just looked at the ground. "Here," Sam said pulling off his black sleeveless shirt and flexing his right arm, "I’ll put mine up against both of yours." Helo and Lee just stood there gaping at him, not sure what to do. "Come on, we gonna do this or not? I’ll bet you guys a bottle of the Chief’s finest."
"I don’t know, this is frakkin’ ridiculous," said Lee gripping his towel before it fell off his hips.
"Oh, come on Major. You afraid someone‘s bigger than you?" Sam laughed over the chill in his voice.
"Come on, Lee. It’ll be worth a laugh or two at least," said Helo, ever the peacemaker.
Lee looked hesitantly down at his pink towel. "Okay, fine." Helo clapped him on the back and moved to his right to form a circle. Arms up and flexed, they pointed their elbows towards the center.
Lee looked around and frowned. Exactly how long were they just going to stand there staring at each other’s arms? "Wait, who’s gonna be the judge?"
#1 - original ending
The door to the Head creaked opened again and in walked possibly the least objective judge that could have stumbled upon these three in this particular position. Kara Thrace took one look at the three shirtless men she knew so well and threw her head back in a loud, uninhibited Kara-cackle. "What the frak are you idiots doing?"
#2
The door to the Head creaked open again and Gaeta walked in with a towel slung over his tanked shoulder. He was looking down and fiddling with some electronic device in his hands, so he didn’t see the circle of arms at first. When he looked up lazily, his expression of boredom did not change. “You guys need a judge or something?”
#3
The door to the Head creaked open again and Col. Tigh stumbled in looking particularly disheveled. He didn’t seem to take much notice of anything, much less a group of shirtless men standing in a circle flexing their beautiful arms. The three men remained still, possibly hoping the Colonel wouldn’t notice them if they didn’t move. After bumping into two sinks, Tigh finally focused on the group and laughed hysterically, “What’s this, some kind of arms race?”
#4
The door to the Head creaked open again and in walked the president of the Twelve frakkin’ Colonies. She stopped abruptly when she saw the group, and a hand went up to touch her collar bone. “Oh, my. I’m terribly sorry to interrupt.” If Helo wasn’t mistaken, a slight blush was coming over Roslin’s cheeks. They all made to straighten up, but she used both of her hands to motion them to stop. “Stay where you are gentlemen.” The three of them looked at each other uncertainly, but the president spoke again before they could do anything. “You boys need a judge?” she asked with a smirk.
#5
The door to the Head creaked open again and Doc Cottle came in holding the butt of a cigarette. He threw it down unceremoniously and looked at the men standing in a circle. “Any of you boys got a cigarette?”
#6
The door to the Head creaked open again and the Admiral of the Colonial fleet stepped through the door. He stood there with hands clasped in front of him, and he arched an eyebrow looking at them over his glasses. “I’m not even going to ask. I just don’t want to see it when I come back in ten minutes.”
Edit: Poll is frakked and I tried to fix it, but I can't figure it out. Sorry. Please submit your vote in comments. Thanks
Thanks for reading and voting!