Not that anyone actually reads the damn thing, but
My mom wrote up a long-winded paragraph about my first year at MIT -- during which I did absolutely NOTHING of note!! -- and sent it to the alumni association for my high school. I now have three column-inches devoted to me and my year of nothing in the alumni updates. This is way, way more than anyone else (and usually only three or so people per class year even bother to send in updates).
Not that I don't appreciate this or anything, but PLEASE ALLOW ME TO TOOT MY OWN HORN. PLEASE ALLOW ME TO DECIDE WHEN IT NEEDS TOOTING. PLEASE DO NOT TOOT IT FOR ME!
I grub for attention enough as it is, despite not actually enjoying attention (which is a habit that needs fixing). Please don't attract me more attention! I don't need it! I don't like it! I'm trying to be less self-centered and narcissistic!
Maybe, next time the alumni association spams for updates, I should pretend to have died. While maintaining normal online presence, not going into hiding or anything. Would they publish it? I think that would be hilarious.
My tooting.
My horn.
MINE.
Not that I don't appreciate this or anything, but PLEASE ALLOW ME TO TOOT MY OWN HORN. PLEASE ALLOW ME TO DECIDE WHEN IT NEEDS TOOTING. PLEASE DO NOT TOOT IT FOR ME!
I grub for attention enough as it is, despite not actually enjoying attention (which is a habit that needs fixing). Please don't attract me more attention! I don't need it! I don't like it! I'm trying to be less self-centered and narcissistic!
Maybe, next time the alumni association spams for updates, I should pretend to have died. While maintaining normal online presence, not going into hiding or anything. Would they publish it? I think that would be hilarious.
My tooting.
My horn.
MINE.