(no subject)
Presently, things are quite well actually. I think I can safely say that, without lying to myself. I know I feel it only for now, but that's okay.
Because everything is always fluctuating and you always have to enjoy the moments you're in.
And even though I don't really feel like I have a place to go, or a place where I am or feel like I should be, that's okay. I've never been the type to have my own place, but rather drift from certain people I like best.
And that's how it is. The people I love best to be around are the people I am around, or trying hard to be around more.
You have to stick to what feels best in your life, and don't stick around with the superfluous and pretentious. You know you'll just feel empty by the time you try to sleep.
According to that video in philosophy (Spenceley is pretty amazing), people who find it hard to fall asleep are the ones who, when confronted with a clear mind and with everything they've tried to hide during the day, don't feel comfortable. With either themselves, their life, or whatever else bugs people these days. Emptiness I guess.
So, I guess I should at least take comfort in the fact that, most of the time, sleep comes to me. And I enjoy the creations of my subconscious.
Very much so.
There are still things within myself I'm not comfortable with, but I think I've decided that it comes with growing. I can't force myself to be a better person, but as long as I don't lose that thought for now.
Anyway, I don't really know where this was going, but I guess all I wanted to confide in myself (impossible on lj anyway), is that I feel pretty okay and I'm going to try to keep the fake out of my life. Because my life shouldn't be a scheme, and I am not an actress.
Because everything is always fluctuating and you always have to enjoy the moments you're in.
And even though I don't really feel like I have a place to go, or a place where I am or feel like I should be, that's okay. I've never been the type to have my own place, but rather drift from certain people I like best.
And that's how it is. The people I love best to be around are the people I am around, or trying hard to be around more.
You have to stick to what feels best in your life, and don't stick around with the superfluous and pretentious. You know you'll just feel empty by the time you try to sleep.
According to that video in philosophy (Spenceley is pretty amazing), people who find it hard to fall asleep are the ones who, when confronted with a clear mind and with everything they've tried to hide during the day, don't feel comfortable. With either themselves, their life, or whatever else bugs people these days. Emptiness I guess.
So, I guess I should at least take comfort in the fact that, most of the time, sleep comes to me. And I enjoy the creations of my subconscious.
Very much so.
There are still things within myself I'm not comfortable with, but I think I've decided that it comes with growing. I can't force myself to be a better person, but as long as I don't lose that thought for now.
Anyway, I don't really know where this was going, but I guess all I wanted to confide in myself (impossible on lj anyway), is that I feel pretty okay and I'm going to try to keep the fake out of my life. Because my life shouldn't be a scheme, and I am not an actress.