I'm in Malaysia and Singapore, and gave the eulogy at my grandmother's funeral
I flew to Malaysia about 10 days ago with my two girls. The 26-hour flight with one transit in Hong Kong was thankfully uneventful; Erika refused to sleep and watched lots of movies until she got on the second flight and just passed out while sitting up with the lights on and a movie playing; Amelia napped a bunch and was restless and attempted to kick the seat in front of her a whole bunch of times, but since I thwarted her attempts, she ended up just kicking me a lot and I have bruises to prove it. When we disembarked from both legs, multiple passengers in the nearby rows thanked me for my well-behaved kids, and Erika said very loudly "THANK YOU!" back at them and Amelia chimed in with a 'ANK YOO!
We landed on Tuesday night and the kids were extremely jet lagged. They ended up getting up at all odd hours of the night like 2 am and 4 am and wondering if it was time to get up and then upset that it was not. And then at 1 pm in the afternoon, they'd be so zonked out and non-functional. This lasted a few days and is horrid as their parent, because while working on my own jet lag, now I had to deal with their jet lag; so even when I was ready to sleep in the night, if they weren't, I had to be up too.
We had plane tickets to then fly to Singapore on Sunday after resting a few days, to see my extended family especially my 96-year old grandmother. But unfortunately she passed away on Saturday morning, a short 24 hours before I was scheduled to see her. I only get the chance to see her once a year, so the last time I saw her was August 2015. I was 24 hours too late to say goodbye to my grandmother; just like how I was too late to say goodbye to my own mother. The silver lining is that I was present for the 5-day wake and the funeral ceremonies. I started freaking out about small things like not having funeral clothes and nothing for the kids to wear; at Chinese funerals, we do not wear any bright colors, so we wear black, white, or gray; and the kids had NOTHING in those shades. So I had to run to the mall and try and find some, but every store appears to be vehemently against childrens clothing in those shades. (I miss New York and the classic black/gray tones, lol)
I was one of three cousins who gave her eulogy. My grandmother had three children, so one grandchild from each was chosen to speak: I spoke first (her daughter's first-born child), then my 26-year old cousin (her youngest son's oldest daughter), and then my 24-year old cousin (her middle child's youngest son). I sobbed hysterically and could barely get any words out. I told the story of how she always puts all of us first, and how we said we were going to go out to dinner for her birthday at her favorite restaurant, and she looked around the room and did a quick head-count and said "oh, I am not hungry tonight, you guys go ahead" and no amount of pleading could convince her. She went to her room and lay down, complaining of a headache; and luckily my uncle caught on to her, and said "hey, we are taking TWO cars to the restaurant, okay!" and she said "oh? We are? So there is enough seats? Okay, I'm coming! I do LOVE that restaurant!" That is how she lived her life. I was nowhere that eloquent because I mostly sobbed and blubbered at the podium and then cried my way back to my seat.
My cousin then spoke about how she was very loving and strong, and always talked about how "we girls never have to depend on a man" which is very modern-thinking for her times; and the third spoke about how she was always thinking of others and loved us so much. And I cried and cried and cried some more. She was cremated, and then we collected her ashes the next day, and scattered her into the sea.
I have no grandparents left.
We landed on Tuesday night and the kids were extremely jet lagged. They ended up getting up at all odd hours of the night like 2 am and 4 am and wondering if it was time to get up and then upset that it was not. And then at 1 pm in the afternoon, they'd be so zonked out and non-functional. This lasted a few days and is horrid as their parent, because while working on my own jet lag, now I had to deal with their jet lag; so even when I was ready to sleep in the night, if they weren't, I had to be up too.
We had plane tickets to then fly to Singapore on Sunday after resting a few days, to see my extended family especially my 96-year old grandmother. But unfortunately she passed away on Saturday morning, a short 24 hours before I was scheduled to see her. I only get the chance to see her once a year, so the last time I saw her was August 2015. I was 24 hours too late to say goodbye to my grandmother; just like how I was too late to say goodbye to my own mother. The silver lining is that I was present for the 5-day wake and the funeral ceremonies. I started freaking out about small things like not having funeral clothes and nothing for the kids to wear; at Chinese funerals, we do not wear any bright colors, so we wear black, white, or gray; and the kids had NOTHING in those shades. So I had to run to the mall and try and find some, but every store appears to be vehemently against childrens clothing in those shades. (I miss New York and the classic black/gray tones, lol)
I was one of three cousins who gave her eulogy. My grandmother had three children, so one grandchild from each was chosen to speak: I spoke first (her daughter's first-born child), then my 26-year old cousin (her youngest son's oldest daughter), and then my 24-year old cousin (her middle child's youngest son). I sobbed hysterically and could barely get any words out. I told the story of how she always puts all of us first, and how we said we were going to go out to dinner for her birthday at her favorite restaurant, and she looked around the room and did a quick head-count and said "oh, I am not hungry tonight, you guys go ahead" and no amount of pleading could convince her. She went to her room and lay down, complaining of a headache; and luckily my uncle caught on to her, and said "hey, we are taking TWO cars to the restaurant, okay!" and she said "oh? We are? So there is enough seats? Okay, I'm coming! I do LOVE that restaurant!" That is how she lived her life. I was nowhere that eloquent because I mostly sobbed and blubbered at the podium and then cried my way back to my seat.
My cousin then spoke about how she was very loving and strong, and always talked about how "we girls never have to depend on a man" which is very modern-thinking for her times; and the third spoke about how she was always thinking of others and loved us so much. And I cried and cried and cried some more. She was cremated, and then we collected her ashes the next day, and scattered her into the sea.
I have no grandparents left.