Delayed December 31: Best moment of the month (
zhelana)
When we arrived at the cemetary and had the ceremonial rites, we were each given a flower (a red rose, her favorite) and a handful of dirt, to say our final goodbye. As I went forward and knelt by her grave, I started sobbing.
Hard, painful, heart-wrenching, soul-breaking tears that shook me. I buried my face in my hands, kneeling on the ground, and cried.
Then I felt a small hand-- like that of an angel-- on my back. And then small arms-- the arms of my 4-year old daughter Erika, I realized--- reaching around to hold me, as I wept the loss of my mother. She didn't offer any trivial words, she didn't say it was going to be okay, she just held me and refused to let go.