What I’ve came to realize in my short 20 years
That I will never be able to figure out what the hell is wrong with me.
That I will never be able to stop myself from crying for long.
That I really don’t believe in religion, not a supreme being, but religion.
That I am not capable of staying friends with ex-boyfriends, guys I’ve slept with, or guys I have just made out with, even if I try, or if we were friends before.
That I have probably said "I love you" way more times than I’ve meant it.
That the times I have meant it, it doesn’t work out.
That I’m a bitch, with a facade of a nice/sweet girl.
That I’m not happy.
That I’m fat. (Don’t deny it, it’s true).
That I miss Meghan, still after almost 3 years, I still sometimes truely believe that it’s been a horrible dream.
That I need noise around me, I shouldn’t be alone with my thoughts.
That I am not a good person, or at least that’s what some people tell me.
That I really have a clue what I want to be, but I’m not sure.
That I want to cry, right now.
That I really loved/love him, and I think it was/is unrequited.
That I really screwed up.
That I wish he would have told me how he felt, and I could have changed those feelings.
That I want to believe that I like the fact that he’s happy now.
That I’m a dumbass, I should have seen it coming.
That I wish I didn’t wish everyday that he would change his mind.
That I wish he was mean to me, ever.
That I don’t know where my life is going, for the second time I had everything planned, but it all went to shit in one day.
That one day I want to be happy again.
That I will never be able to stop myself from crying for long.
That I really don’t believe in religion, not a supreme being, but religion.
That I am not capable of staying friends with ex-boyfriends, guys I’ve slept with, or guys I have just made out with, even if I try, or if we were friends before.
That I have probably said "I love you" way more times than I’ve meant it.
That the times I have meant it, it doesn’t work out.
That I’m a bitch, with a facade of a nice/sweet girl.
That I’m not happy.
That I’m fat. (Don’t deny it, it’s true).
That I miss Meghan, still after almost 3 years, I still sometimes truely believe that it’s been a horrible dream.
That I need noise around me, I shouldn’t be alone with my thoughts.
That I am not a good person, or at least that’s what some people tell me.
That I really have a clue what I want to be, but I’m not sure.
That I want to cry, right now.
That I really loved/love him, and I think it was/is unrequited.
That I really screwed up.
That I wish he would have told me how he felt, and I could have changed those feelings.
That I want to believe that I like the fact that he’s happy now.
That I’m a dumbass, I should have seen it coming.
That I wish I didn’t wish everyday that he would change his mind.
That I wish he was mean to me, ever.
That I don’t know where my life is going, for the second time I had everything planned, but it all went to shit in one day.
That one day I want to be happy again.