The Church and Its Orbs - The Wayward God
More The Church and Its Orbs. I'm still playing around in canon, but apparently Kai *really* wants a certain flaw.
---------
I’ve been looking for Kai, and I found the wayward god.
“You know Wren is going to kill you, right?” I mutter at him
“It’s not like I stole this vodka from her. Not this time,” he says, lifting up the almost-empty bottle. He slurs his words as he sits leaning against a tree in the Purity Garden.
I narrow my eyes as I take a seat on the stone bench next to the tree. Kai may be a god, but right now I want to throttle him. “That’s not the point,” I say.
“She’s not here, is she?” he says, grinning. It’s lopsided. He narrows his own eyes but can’t focus his gaze very well. “What’re you doing here, anyway?”
“Looking for you, fluff brain,” I mutter. “I had to sneak onto campus. What if someone catches you here?”
What if someone catches me here?
“Fluff brain?” he snorts, shaking his head. “What’s that even mean?”
“It means you’ve replaced your brain with fluff if you’re drinking again,” I say, clenching my jaw.
Kai answers by taking another swig of the vodka. “What’s wrong with a little fluff?” he murmurs.
“Everything,” I say. I can’t even look at him anymore.
If this were a nicer occasion, I would spend time admiring the sunset. It bursts into pinks, golds, oranges and purples, color streaking the sky. It’s a true work of the gods, only I have a god right here in front of me, and he’s as drunk as anything. I doubt Kai could create so much as a single ray of light in his condition.
“Everything? That’s a lot,” he says.
“A lot? Well, you’re in a lot of trouble,” I mutter.
“Don’t tell Wren? Please?” Kai says. He puts down his vodka and looks up at me with wide, sad eyes. They glisten with unshed tears. Kai means for the expression to pull on my sympathy, but his effort fails. Those big blue eyes may charm all the girls at my former school, but they annoy me. He’s drunk and can’t even focus his gaze -- how could he think looking at me like that would do anything for him now?
“Puppy dog eyes don’t work when you’re drunk,” I say, glaring at him. I lean over and snatch his vodka away while he’s not holding it.
“Are you sure? And can I have my vodka back?” he says, somehow opening his eyes wider. The new expression makes him look slightly deranged.
“I’m sure, and, no, you can’t have your vodka. I’m not stupid,” I say, putting the bottle down on the bench so I’m between it and Kai.
Kai pouts, which annoys me even more than the ridiculous eyes. “Pretty please?” he murmurs.
When I shake my head, he tries to stand up and grab the bottle back. He swipes his hand in its general direction and falls flat on his face. Kai tries to get up after that and stumbles, falling a second time. Grumbling, he reaches for the bottle yet again. I grab it and hold it above my head. Kai swipes for it, resulting in another fall. Inspiration strikes me, and I pour the rest of the vodka onto the ground while he watches, eyes wide with disbelief.
“That was good vodka,” he breathes.
“In your case, there’s no such thing as good vodka,” I mutter, putting the bottle back down on the bench. “Now, why don’t you sober up? I know you can stop being drunk if you want to.” Kai may be in human form, but godhood has certain physical advantages even then.
“I don’t wanna,” he says, pouting again. Of course he doesn’t want to use those advantages.
“Why did you get drunk in the first place? You had a deal, and you broke it,” I say, shaking my head. His slip worries me -- it seems he truly can’t just stop whenever he wants to.
“It’s Wren’s fault. She made me break the deal. She made me,” Kai says.
“Oh, I’m sure she did. That makes perfect sense,” I snort, crossing my arms over my chest. “Now, what really happened?”
“I told you -- she made me,” he says.
“And how exactly did she do that?” I mutter. Kai refuses to make any sense, and I wonder if this is hopeless.
“She kissed him,” he says. His eyes shine with tears -- real ones.
“Kissed whom?” I ask. My stomach swoops into my chest. What is he talking about?
“Brandon. Wren kissed Brandon,” he says.
I stare at Kai, sure I didn’t hear right. “That makes no sense,” I mutter. “Wren wouldn’t --”
“-- she would. I saw them,” he says. His eyes, still unfocused from all the drink, burn with such fire I scoot away from Kai on the bench. My stomach won’t settle down. Neither will my mind. Wren kissed Brandon? I can’t believe it.
“Why would she do that? She wanted to kill you when she found out you’re a god. Now she’s kissing him?” I mutter. It doesn’t seem...right.
“I wanted to kiss him,” he says. “Never been good at getting close to people I like, and when I found someone...he kisses somebody else first.”
While I know Kai prefers other guys, I have trouble wrapping my head around it -- the Church says being with your own gender damns you to oblivion if you don’t cure it. It’s one of the worst things a person a can do -- it shows a ‘defect of the soul.’” Even if the Church has lied about so much, it’s hard to think about it all. Still, Kai’s my friend, and I sympathize with him, as unusual as his tastes are.
“Is that worth getting drunk over?” I ask. Part of me almost thinks it is. Kai’s lament resonates with me, somehow.
Kai sways back and forth in his seat by the tree. “Why not? Everything’s terrible anyway,” he says. He pauses, and the Purity Garden goes quiet, without the slightest breeze. “Please don’t tell Wren about any of this? She doesn’t know I saw them.”
I shake my head. “Sorry, Kai. You broke the deal, and...this isn’t healthy.”
He tries those unfocused puppy dog eyes on me again. In the darkening night, they’re harder to see, and they still don’t move me. “Please?” he says.
The sun’s almost set by now, the darkness making the Purity Garden eerie. A half moon casts enough light to see by, but everything’s shadowed, including Kai’s face. In this light, he resembles a void, sucking energy and everything else into him.
Thinking about Wren and Brandon together darkens the night further, and I shiver, though it’s not actually gotten any colder.
“Sorry,” I murmur. “But I won’t tell her you saw them together. I...don’t like thinking about that, either.”
“You wouldn’t, would you?” he says. “And you have no idea why, do you?”
Having no idea what he’s going on about, I twist a strand of hair around my finger. “Why what?” I ask.
Kai sighs and looks up at the sky. He plays with the fringe of his scarf. “Maybe I should sober up before I say something stupid,” he says.
I glare at him. “That’s long overdue, and you know it,” I mutter, trying to conceal my surprise that he’s all of a sudden willing to sober up now.
He nods and blinks many times When he stops blinking, his eyes focus on me, sharp as anything. Kai then winces and holds a hand to his forehead. “Sobering up like that always gives me a headache,” he says.
Kai’s headache? I don’t have much sympathy for it, though I do worry about him.
Part of me wants to ask him why I would have “no idea” about why I don’t like thinking of Wren and Brandon together. Another part of me just doesn’t want to think about it at all, but I can’t get the image of those two out of my mind. Why would she pick him?
“We should get out of here,” Kai murmurs, not slurring his words anymore.
I nod, getting up from the bench. “I’m not even supposed to be at the school,” I say.
Kai stands up, using the tree to brace himself. He doesn’t wobble too much as he rises, though he winces again. “Maybe we should wait a minute or two. My head’s killing me, and getting home with a headache is such a pain,” Kai says, squeezing his eyes shut.
I’ve been staying with Wren recently -- knowing she was kissing Brandon will make getting home difficult for me as well. I just don’t like the idea of it, even as the thought plays over and over in my mind. My feelings discomfit me because I should have no problem with my friends’ liking each other in that way. It’s not like I want to kiss Brandon, or anyone else.
So why am I so bothered?
---------
I’ve been looking for Kai, and I found the wayward god.
“You know Wren is going to kill you, right?” I mutter at him
“It’s not like I stole this vodka from her. Not this time,” he says, lifting up the almost-empty bottle. He slurs his words as he sits leaning against a tree in the Purity Garden.
I narrow my eyes as I take a seat on the stone bench next to the tree. Kai may be a god, but right now I want to throttle him. “That’s not the point,” I say.
“She’s not here, is she?” he says, grinning. It’s lopsided. He narrows his own eyes but can’t focus his gaze very well. “What’re you doing here, anyway?”
“Looking for you, fluff brain,” I mutter. “I had to sneak onto campus. What if someone catches you here?”
What if someone catches me here?
“Fluff brain?” he snorts, shaking his head. “What’s that even mean?”
“It means you’ve replaced your brain with fluff if you’re drinking again,” I say, clenching my jaw.
Kai answers by taking another swig of the vodka. “What’s wrong with a little fluff?” he murmurs.
“Everything,” I say. I can’t even look at him anymore.
If this were a nicer occasion, I would spend time admiring the sunset. It bursts into pinks, golds, oranges and purples, color streaking the sky. It’s a true work of the gods, only I have a god right here in front of me, and he’s as drunk as anything. I doubt Kai could create so much as a single ray of light in his condition.
“Everything? That’s a lot,” he says.
“A lot? Well, you’re in a lot of trouble,” I mutter.
“Don’t tell Wren? Please?” Kai says. He puts down his vodka and looks up at me with wide, sad eyes. They glisten with unshed tears. Kai means for the expression to pull on my sympathy, but his effort fails. Those big blue eyes may charm all the girls at my former school, but they annoy me. He’s drunk and can’t even focus his gaze -- how could he think looking at me like that would do anything for him now?
“Puppy dog eyes don’t work when you’re drunk,” I say, glaring at him. I lean over and snatch his vodka away while he’s not holding it.
“Are you sure? And can I have my vodka back?” he says, somehow opening his eyes wider. The new expression makes him look slightly deranged.
“I’m sure, and, no, you can’t have your vodka. I’m not stupid,” I say, putting the bottle down on the bench so I’m between it and Kai.
Kai pouts, which annoys me even more than the ridiculous eyes. “Pretty please?” he murmurs.
When I shake my head, he tries to stand up and grab the bottle back. He swipes his hand in its general direction and falls flat on his face. Kai tries to get up after that and stumbles, falling a second time. Grumbling, he reaches for the bottle yet again. I grab it and hold it above my head. Kai swipes for it, resulting in another fall. Inspiration strikes me, and I pour the rest of the vodka onto the ground while he watches, eyes wide with disbelief.
“That was good vodka,” he breathes.
“In your case, there’s no such thing as good vodka,” I mutter, putting the bottle back down on the bench. “Now, why don’t you sober up? I know you can stop being drunk if you want to.” Kai may be in human form, but godhood has certain physical advantages even then.
“I don’t wanna,” he says, pouting again. Of course he doesn’t want to use those advantages.
“Why did you get drunk in the first place? You had a deal, and you broke it,” I say, shaking my head. His slip worries me -- it seems he truly can’t just stop whenever he wants to.
“It’s Wren’s fault. She made me break the deal. She made me,” Kai says.
“Oh, I’m sure she did. That makes perfect sense,” I snort, crossing my arms over my chest. “Now, what really happened?”
“I told you -- she made me,” he says.
“And how exactly did she do that?” I mutter. Kai refuses to make any sense, and I wonder if this is hopeless.
“She kissed him,” he says. His eyes shine with tears -- real ones.
“Kissed whom?” I ask. My stomach swoops into my chest. What is he talking about?
“Brandon. Wren kissed Brandon,” he says.
I stare at Kai, sure I didn’t hear right. “That makes no sense,” I mutter. “Wren wouldn’t --”
“-- she would. I saw them,” he says. His eyes, still unfocused from all the drink, burn with such fire I scoot away from Kai on the bench. My stomach won’t settle down. Neither will my mind. Wren kissed Brandon? I can’t believe it.
“Why would she do that? She wanted to kill you when she found out you’re a god. Now she’s kissing him?” I mutter. It doesn’t seem...right.
“I wanted to kiss him,” he says. “Never been good at getting close to people I like, and when I found someone...he kisses somebody else first.”
While I know Kai prefers other guys, I have trouble wrapping my head around it -- the Church says being with your own gender damns you to oblivion if you don’t cure it. It’s one of the worst things a person a can do -- it shows a ‘defect of the soul.’” Even if the Church has lied about so much, it’s hard to think about it all. Still, Kai’s my friend, and I sympathize with him, as unusual as his tastes are.
“Is that worth getting drunk over?” I ask. Part of me almost thinks it is. Kai’s lament resonates with me, somehow.
Kai sways back and forth in his seat by the tree. “Why not? Everything’s terrible anyway,” he says. He pauses, and the Purity Garden goes quiet, without the slightest breeze. “Please don’t tell Wren about any of this? She doesn’t know I saw them.”
I shake my head. “Sorry, Kai. You broke the deal, and...this isn’t healthy.”
He tries those unfocused puppy dog eyes on me again. In the darkening night, they’re harder to see, and they still don’t move me. “Please?” he says.
The sun’s almost set by now, the darkness making the Purity Garden eerie. A half moon casts enough light to see by, but everything’s shadowed, including Kai’s face. In this light, he resembles a void, sucking energy and everything else into him.
Thinking about Wren and Brandon together darkens the night further, and I shiver, though it’s not actually gotten any colder.
“Sorry,” I murmur. “But I won’t tell her you saw them together. I...don’t like thinking about that, either.”
“You wouldn’t, would you?” he says. “And you have no idea why, do you?”
Having no idea what he’s going on about, I twist a strand of hair around my finger. “Why what?” I ask.
Kai sighs and looks up at the sky. He plays with the fringe of his scarf. “Maybe I should sober up before I say something stupid,” he says.
I glare at him. “That’s long overdue, and you know it,” I mutter, trying to conceal my surprise that he’s all of a sudden willing to sober up now.
He nods and blinks many times When he stops blinking, his eyes focus on me, sharp as anything. Kai then winces and holds a hand to his forehead. “Sobering up like that always gives me a headache,” he says.
Kai’s headache? I don’t have much sympathy for it, though I do worry about him.
Part of me wants to ask him why I would have “no idea” about why I don’t like thinking of Wren and Brandon together. Another part of me just doesn’t want to think about it at all, but I can’t get the image of those two out of my mind. Why would she pick him?
“We should get out of here,” Kai murmurs, not slurring his words anymore.
I nod, getting up from the bench. “I’m not even supposed to be at the school,” I say.
Kai stands up, using the tree to brace himself. He doesn’t wobble too much as he rises, though he winces again. “Maybe we should wait a minute or two. My head’s killing me, and getting home with a headache is such a pain,” Kai says, squeezing his eyes shut.
I’ve been staying with Wren recently -- knowing she was kissing Brandon will make getting home difficult for me as well. I just don’t like the idea of it, even as the thought plays over and over in my mind. My feelings discomfit me because I should have no problem with my friends’ liking each other in that way. It’s not like I want to kiss Brandon, or anyone else.
So why am I so bothered?