IF THERES ANY FUCKIN GOOD IN THE WORLD, IVE NEVER SEEN IT
WHY DONT PEOPLE UNDERSTAND? I TOLD ERIC THE REASON I BROKE UP WITH HIM, BUT HE SEEMS TO THINK IT IS ALL BULLSHIT. WHAT THE FUCK? I HAVE TO SOLVE EVERY FUCKIN PROBLEM IN MY HOUSE. IM GETTING TO THE POINT WHERE I REALLY WANNA KILL MYSELF AGAIN. WHY? EVERYTHING IS MY FAULT! MY DAD TREATING EVERYONE LIKE SHIT: MY FAULT. SCHOOL BEING REALLY SHITTY FOR THE PAST 4 YEARS: MY FAULT. IT DOESNT SEEM LIKE MUCH BUT TRY FUCKIN LIVING IT. TRY SITTING UP ALL NIGHT LISTENING TO YOUR PARENTS FIGHT ABOUT YOUR BEST FRIEND AND HOW MUCH YOUR MOM HATES HER AND HOW MUCH YOUR DAD LOVES HER. TRY BEING SCREAMED AT WHEN YOU WANT TO GO OUT BUT IT INTERFERES WITH YOUR DADS PLANS WITH YOUR BEST FRIEND. TRY BEING ALONE IN YOUR ROOM WHEN YOUR NOT ALLOWED TO SEE YOUR BEST FRIEND WHEN SHES IN YOUR DADS ROOM. TRY DOING REALLY FUCKIN BAD AT SCHOOL THEN HAVING TO BRING YOURSELF OUT. TRY NOT SEEING ANY GOOD IN THE WORLD AND HAVING YOUR ONLY WISH TO BE TO DIE BEFORE THE DAY IS OVER. TRY WATCHING YOUR BOTHER HAVE A NERVOUS BREAK DOWN EVERY TIME YOUR DAD YELLS AT HIM. TRY BEING YELLED AT EVERY DAY FOR NOTHING. TRY BEING DENIED EVERYTHING YOU WANT. TRY BEING A SLAVE TO YOUR FATHER, HAVING TO BOW TO HIS EVERY WHIM. TRY LIVING MY LIFE. YOULL SEE HOW FUCKIN STRESS FULL IT REALLY FUCKIN IS....or just try sitting and staring at your wall, hoping that not all your freinds have abandon you...just try sitting and wondering when someone will call....and then try not to hate everything...its not easy...
I CANT STAND LIVING ANYMORE. EVERYTIME I TRY TO DO WHAT I THINK I RIGHT, I GET FUCKED IN THE ASS. I CANT HANDLE MY LIFE. ITS WAY TOO MUCH. NOTHING EVER WORKS OUT. why cant one thing, just one thing work out instead of me being hated, or beaten or rapped. i cant take that anymore. its all happened too many times....i should just isolate myself from people. never be seen. become the loner ive always dreaded.......damnit...i dont want to be alone again, but it seems the only thing i can do to NOT hurt people...GODDAMMIT! I FUCKIN HATE THIS! im done. this time, i give up i really do. i dont care anymore. people can believe what they want. i know all of this is true. i know im going insane. i know im prolly going to kill a few people before im dead...but i dont care. i give up.
I Give Up....
I CANT STAND LIVING ANYMORE. EVERYTIME I TRY TO DO WHAT I THINK I RIGHT, I GET FUCKED IN THE ASS. I CANT HANDLE MY LIFE. ITS WAY TOO MUCH. NOTHING EVER WORKS OUT. why cant one thing, just one thing work out instead of me being hated, or beaten or rapped. i cant take that anymore. its all happened too many times....i should just isolate myself from people. never be seen. become the loner ive always dreaded.......damnit...i dont want to be alone again, but it seems the only thing i can do to NOT hurt people...GODDAMMIT! I FUCKIN HATE THIS! im done. this time, i give up i really do. i dont care anymore. people can believe what they want. i know all of this is true. i know im going insane. i know im prolly going to kill a few people before im dead...but i dont care. i give up.
I Give Up....