Hey
Well it seems like its been forever since i updated.. and it really has been... But I needed to rant so i decided to post...
Man do i hate men sometimes... The whole story is my boyfriend of the last six months is married. They are getting divorced but its an awkward situation because i am 19 years younger then he is. And he has kids that i went to high school with.. This doesnt bother me but it does bother him some what... 2 of his kids already know about me. his sons are cool they like me and we have hung out and gone and done stuff together and what not.. but now he (my boyfriend) has decided that we cant spend as much time together as we were because he doesnt want his wife to know about me until after the divorce. i can understand that but i dont see why he wants me to date other people. he told me that it was okay if i dated other people. I dont think thats okay but of course him being a man does think that.. Oh its okay as long as i dont have sex with however it is that i go out with... He doesnt seem to grasp the consept of the fact thati am in love with him dont want to be with anyone else. Cant stand the thought of going out with anyone else let alone having sex with anyone else. he is the only person i want to be with and if that means we have to hide and i have to be unhappy about the situatuion for a couple months then i can deal with the situation.. I dotn have to be happy twenty four hours a day seven das a week.. Im just happy to get to talk to him.. I just like it when he calls when he says he will..and tells me that he loves me.. thats all i need to make it bearable. I dont care if it takes another six months to a year as long as were together then im happy. I told him recently that if i was going to get my heart broken by the whole situation then i would rather go ahead and get my heart broken then wait a couple months and really be upset. Hes the only man i want but if im going to get hurt anyway then id rather get it over with and get over it. I know that may seem like i dont care but thats the problem i do care.. i care to much.. but it seems not about the most important things..
to make matters worse, my exboyfriend has been tryingto get back together with me and he knows that we are having problems and he keeps callingme and asking if he can come stay the night and be with me and i keep telling him no but that gets harder to do everytime i talk to him.. I mean i loved him and I still do in certain ways but the reason why we broke up should be enough for me not to want to get backtogether with him. I mean for god sake he cheated on me witha friend of mine and then they both lied to me about it for months.. When i did find out about it we had this huge fight and shit happened and we didnt talk for months but i mean he was one of my bestfriends and even when we werent together i wanted to be togther...
I guess the whole point of this rant is i dont know if i want to get back together with my ex or stay with my boyfriend... And the problem is i love both of them.
Man do i hate men sometimes... The whole story is my boyfriend of the last six months is married. They are getting divorced but its an awkward situation because i am 19 years younger then he is. And he has kids that i went to high school with.. This doesnt bother me but it does bother him some what... 2 of his kids already know about me. his sons are cool they like me and we have hung out and gone and done stuff together and what not.. but now he (my boyfriend) has decided that we cant spend as much time together as we were because he doesnt want his wife to know about me until after the divorce. i can understand that but i dont see why he wants me to date other people. he told me that it was okay if i dated other people. I dont think thats okay but of course him being a man does think that.. Oh its okay as long as i dont have sex with however it is that i go out with... He doesnt seem to grasp the consept of the fact thati am in love with him dont want to be with anyone else. Cant stand the thought of going out with anyone else let alone having sex with anyone else. he is the only person i want to be with and if that means we have to hide and i have to be unhappy about the situatuion for a couple months then i can deal with the situation.. I dotn have to be happy twenty four hours a day seven das a week.. Im just happy to get to talk to him.. I just like it when he calls when he says he will..and tells me that he loves me.. thats all i need to make it bearable. I dont care if it takes another six months to a year as long as were together then im happy. I told him recently that if i was going to get my heart broken by the whole situation then i would rather go ahead and get my heart broken then wait a couple months and really be upset. Hes the only man i want but if im going to get hurt anyway then id rather get it over with and get over it. I know that may seem like i dont care but thats the problem i do care.. i care to much.. but it seems not about the most important things..
to make matters worse, my exboyfriend has been tryingto get back together with me and he knows that we are having problems and he keeps callingme and asking if he can come stay the night and be with me and i keep telling him no but that gets harder to do everytime i talk to him.. I mean i loved him and I still do in certain ways but the reason why we broke up should be enough for me not to want to get backtogether with him. I mean for god sake he cheated on me witha friend of mine and then they both lied to me about it for months.. When i did find out about it we had this huge fight and shit happened and we didnt talk for months but i mean he was one of my bestfriends and even when we werent together i wanted to be togther...
I guess the whole point of this rant is i dont know if i want to get back together with my ex or stay with my boyfriend... And the problem is i love both of them.