How Pregnancy, Childbirth, and baby Dante has Change Me
I think the title speaks for itself. Dante is napping right now (whew!) and I have a rare moment to myself. I'm going to take the few minutes I have to express how pregnancy, labor/delivery, and taking care of another life entirely has changed my perceptions.
Even though I didn't like pregnancy, childbirth was not fun either, and taking care of a newborn is hard alot of the time, it was a worthwhile experience for many reasons. Of course, the best reason is that I have Dante, the love of my life, the best thing that has ever come into my world. But there are other positive side effects as well.
First of all, for the first time in my life I feel good about my body. I truly feel sexy. I don't mind wearing sexy things and getting my picture taken or being on camera anymore. Before getting pregnant, I would look at celebrities and fashion models and think, "wow, I wish I could look like that". No matter how many compliments Hernan would give me, I wouldn't think I was good enough. Ever. I would think "I have too much fat on my butt and thighs" or "my face isn't pretty enough, it's too round and my nose is too pudgy" or "my boobs aren't big enough". I know it's normal for women to struggle with body image issues, and I certainly did. Then I got pregnant and towards the end I REALLY felt like a cow.
But now, when I look in the mirror, I feel sexy. I see fashion models and think "I'm just as sexy as they are". I look in the mirror and see perfectly portioned hips and feel my boobs are just the right size. I will put on a little bit of makeup and do my hair and think that I look pretty. Of course, this didn't come about until several months after childbirth, and I can't really pinpoint why. Maybe its because I look at my body in a different way. Even though my tummy is not as flat as it used to be, it housed Dante safely for a long time. My hips opened to push Dante out, my breasts feed him every day. Dante sees my faces and smiles.
The next major change is I don't seem to fear losing control anymore. The perfect example here is riding. The reason why I think I never got good at riding a horse was because the horse literally has a mind all its own that I wouldn't always be able to control. Now, I want to ride again. I no longer have that fear of not having control.
For the first time in my life, I am living in the moment. I am content with how things are in my life right now. I have always looked forward to the future and thinking how much "better" it will be then and not really living in the moment. As I sit here listening to Christmas music, there is a certain Zen-like quality in the house that I'm enjoying. Not that there isn't things in the future to look forward to, but I am enjoying the moment, even though Dante is teething.
Gtg, Dante is fussing...have a great holidays, everyone!
-Bon
Even though I didn't like pregnancy, childbirth was not fun either, and taking care of a newborn is hard alot of the time, it was a worthwhile experience for many reasons. Of course, the best reason is that I have Dante, the love of my life, the best thing that has ever come into my world. But there are other positive side effects as well.
First of all, for the first time in my life I feel good about my body. I truly feel sexy. I don't mind wearing sexy things and getting my picture taken or being on camera anymore. Before getting pregnant, I would look at celebrities and fashion models and think, "wow, I wish I could look like that". No matter how many compliments Hernan would give me, I wouldn't think I was good enough. Ever. I would think "I have too much fat on my butt and thighs" or "my face isn't pretty enough, it's too round and my nose is too pudgy" or "my boobs aren't big enough". I know it's normal for women to struggle with body image issues, and I certainly did. Then I got pregnant and towards the end I REALLY felt like a cow.
But now, when I look in the mirror, I feel sexy. I see fashion models and think "I'm just as sexy as they are". I look in the mirror and see perfectly portioned hips and feel my boobs are just the right size. I will put on a little bit of makeup and do my hair and think that I look pretty. Of course, this didn't come about until several months after childbirth, and I can't really pinpoint why. Maybe its because I look at my body in a different way. Even though my tummy is not as flat as it used to be, it housed Dante safely for a long time. My hips opened to push Dante out, my breasts feed him every day. Dante sees my faces and smiles.
The next major change is I don't seem to fear losing control anymore. The perfect example here is riding. The reason why I think I never got good at riding a horse was because the horse literally has a mind all its own that I wouldn't always be able to control. Now, I want to ride again. I no longer have that fear of not having control.
For the first time in my life, I am living in the moment. I am content with how things are in my life right now. I have always looked forward to the future and thinking how much "better" it will be then and not really living in the moment. As I sit here listening to Christmas music, there is a certain Zen-like quality in the house that I'm enjoying. Not that there isn't things in the future to look forward to, but I am enjoying the moment, even though Dante is teething.
Gtg, Dante is fussing...have a great holidays, everyone!
-Bon