i'm pathetic
I am so fucking pathetic. I had a goddamn panic attack yesterday, because I was trying to call the fucking doctor. I hate fucking doctors. The only reason I'm even going is because my landlords were threatening to evict me if I didn't. So now I have an apppointment for the 14th to find out whether or not I'm preggers, but I'm severly freaking out and not sure if I can go without another panic attack. Yesterday's was horrid. It lasted a fucking half hour and then I made the appointment freaking out the entire time I was talking to the lady and when I finally got off the phone I was still freaking so I drove an hour and spent the entire day with me mum. I love my mummy. She babied me all day and got me whatever I wanted because she knew I was freaking and it made it all better until I came home last night. Now I'm still freaking about the doctor and it's 2 fucking weeks away. I am PATHETIC. Seriously.... who the hell has a panic attack trying to call the doctor??? And I don't know what I'm going to do on the 14th because I just realized I've never been to the doctor by myself. Probably because everyone drug me because they knew I wouldn't go on my own. But it's really sad that I'm just now realizing how much I hate the doctor. Any doctor, it doesn't matter but I HATE going to the doctor. Have no clue why either. Fuck it......