Week of Insanity
Got home and hit the ground running big time.
1. Arrived to find a three thousand dollar bill waiting for me from Student Services. Jokes on me. The loan I had to get to pay for summer classes--summer classes I ended up withdrawing from what with leaving school, has defaulted and since it's private as opposed to a government loan, it must be paid right away. Or I can defer and rack up truly terrifying debt. Yeah, because I can afford that right now. I'm just rolling in dough what with being unemployed and all. That's why I needed the freaking loan in the first place!! How could this happen? When I withdrew, I met with financial aid and was reassured that there would be nothing hinky and no kind of penalties. Of course, I'm also pissed because I was on academic probation when I signed up for the freaking classes. Why was there no red flag? Why should I have to pay for a full summer's worth when I attended a grand total of three days of classes? If I'd known that this could have happened, I wouldn't have bothered. I would have left school in May and gotten a job, etc. Christ, if they were going to fuck me over couldn't they have taken me out to dinner first?
2. My shiny brand new lap top is apparently a very expensive typewriter. My wi-fi isn't working and IT tech came by to look it over and has declared my entire motherboard needs to be rebuilt. I'm under warranty so at least it won't cost anything, but jeez...the thing is less than a year old!
3. Spent the last two days baking. Twice the daddies twice the baking. Made peanut butter cookies for Dad and the timer on the oven broke and had to replace that. Made a spice cake with coffee frosting for Bio-Daddy and it didn't rise and ended up all rubbery and gross so I had to try again. The cookies are fabulous. THe cake looks beautiful and even if it tastes like crap, he is going to eat it and smile, goddammit! I'm kind of buzzing right now. I licked the bowl with the batter in it and probably ate more frosting than was good for me so I've got a major sugar rush.
4. Tomorrow I'm taking Bio-Daddy to lunch and then the evil hosebeasts from Hell (aka, my stepsisters) will descend upon us for a bar-b-que. Which we bought all the food for and will be cooking. Because nothing says 'Love you, Dad' like sitting around watching your father do all the work. Oh, and to make his special day even more memorable, the Bitcas won't say a word to me or Mither, even though it's our own fucking house! Oh and did I mention that Mither is the one who had to plan the whole get-together and make all the arrangements? And that we really can't afford to spend this kind of money for a big gathering what with my school expenses, Mither not working as much after having surgery on her back, etc...God, I hate them. Fire of a thousand suns, flames, flames, flames on the side of my face hate!
5. It's been over a week and I still haven't heard a word from Sicily about my leaving school. I told her that I wanted us to stay in touch and that she's still a hugely important person in my life. That not being classmates doesn't mean she isn't one of my best friends. Why wouldn't she contact me? She of all people would understand how much pressure I was under at school. She knows how stressed I've been. I thought she's be happy and supportive that I've found another path and that I'm optimistic about the future for the first time in a long time. Is she mad at me? Disappointed? Argh, havoc on my inadequacy issues...
6. Now that I'm no longer a full time student, my health insurance has run out. I'm usually pretty healthy, but not having insurance is sooo scary. I don't do well with uncertainty. Talk about your incentive to work hard and get a job quick! 'Please, hire me. I need to go to the dentist.'
7. Have written out a deliciously dark and angsty sequel to Fool Yourself and as sure as life stops kicking my ass will post it.
8. Start my paralegal classes in ONE WEEK!!!!!!
1. Arrived to find a three thousand dollar bill waiting for me from Student Services. Jokes on me. The loan I had to get to pay for summer classes--summer classes I ended up withdrawing from what with leaving school, has defaulted and since it's private as opposed to a government loan, it must be paid right away. Or I can defer and rack up truly terrifying debt. Yeah, because I can afford that right now. I'm just rolling in dough what with being unemployed and all. That's why I needed the freaking loan in the first place!! How could this happen? When I withdrew, I met with financial aid and was reassured that there would be nothing hinky and no kind of penalties. Of course, I'm also pissed because I was on academic probation when I signed up for the freaking classes. Why was there no red flag? Why should I have to pay for a full summer's worth when I attended a grand total of three days of classes? If I'd known that this could have happened, I wouldn't have bothered. I would have left school in May and gotten a job, etc. Christ, if they were going to fuck me over couldn't they have taken me out to dinner first?
2. My shiny brand new lap top is apparently a very expensive typewriter. My wi-fi isn't working and IT tech came by to look it over and has declared my entire motherboard needs to be rebuilt. I'm under warranty so at least it won't cost anything, but jeez...the thing is less than a year old!
3. Spent the last two days baking. Twice the daddies twice the baking. Made peanut butter cookies for Dad and the timer on the oven broke and had to replace that. Made a spice cake with coffee frosting for Bio-Daddy and it didn't rise and ended up all rubbery and gross so I had to try again. The cookies are fabulous. THe cake looks beautiful and even if it tastes like crap, he is going to eat it and smile, goddammit! I'm kind of buzzing right now. I licked the bowl with the batter in it and probably ate more frosting than was good for me so I've got a major sugar rush.
4. Tomorrow I'm taking Bio-Daddy to lunch and then the evil hosebeasts from Hell (aka, my stepsisters) will descend upon us for a bar-b-que. Which we bought all the food for and will be cooking. Because nothing says 'Love you, Dad' like sitting around watching your father do all the work. Oh, and to make his special day even more memorable, the Bitcas won't say a word to me or Mither, even though it's our own fucking house! Oh and did I mention that Mither is the one who had to plan the whole get-together and make all the arrangements? And that we really can't afford to spend this kind of money for a big gathering what with my school expenses, Mither not working as much after having surgery on her back, etc...God, I hate them. Fire of a thousand suns, flames, flames, flames on the side of my face hate!
5. It's been over a week and I still haven't heard a word from Sicily about my leaving school. I told her that I wanted us to stay in touch and that she's still a hugely important person in my life. That not being classmates doesn't mean she isn't one of my best friends. Why wouldn't she contact me? She of all people would understand how much pressure I was under at school. She knows how stressed I've been. I thought she's be happy and supportive that I've found another path and that I'm optimistic about the future for the first time in a long time. Is she mad at me? Disappointed? Argh, havoc on my inadequacy issues...
6. Now that I'm no longer a full time student, my health insurance has run out. I'm usually pretty healthy, but not having insurance is sooo scary. I don't do well with uncertainty. Talk about your incentive to work hard and get a job quick! 'Please, hire me. I need to go to the dentist.'
7. Have written out a deliciously dark and angsty sequel to Fool Yourself and as sure as life stops kicking my ass will post it.
8. Start my paralegal classes in ONE WEEK!!!!!!