A million branches, a million ideas
I have such incredibly mixed feelings about James Kochalka ending American Elf.
On one hand I'm sad. I'm really, really sad, because American Elf is this happy place for me. It's this place that's warm and fun and real; James is a real person who has real anxieties and failures and triumphs. He worries about things that are important and that are insignificant, and he finds joy in things that are huge and things that are tiny. I feel like James could just as easily be me or one of my best friends, and I'm sad that I won't get to share all the little moments that make up his life anymore.
But at the same time, I'm so excited for him. He's been doing American Elf for 15 years. 15 years! That's roughly 5,475 strips! I can't imagine what that must be like, to produce something each and every day for over a decade, let alone something that's based on some of the most intimate moments of my life.
Of course I can't speak for James, but I can only guess that American Elf has been both a boon and a burden for him. That's 15 years of daily reflection. Reflection can be therapeutic, but it can also be very, very painful. Routine can be steadying, but it can also be monotonous. He's considered ending American Elf several times over the years, but in the end he's always changed his mind. Something made him consider stopping, and something made him keep going. And now something has made him consider stopping, and he's made the decision to stop.
And what that says to me isn't that he's out of ideas or being lazy or abandoning his strip or his readers. What that says to me is that James has gotten out of American Elf all that he can or wants to get out of it right now. He's ready to conclude this chapter of his life and to move onto other things. He's still conflicted about finishing American Elf-- he mentions it all the time in his strips since making the announcement-- but in some way, he must be at peace with it. This must feel like the right time. I can only imagine how scary and life-changing this must be, and James has all of my respect for having the courage and grace to go through with it.
So maybe my feelings aren't that conflicted. Because yeah, I'm going to miss James. I'm going to miss Amy and Eli and Oliver. I'm going to miss Jason X-12 and Spandy and Nooko. But more than that, I'm happy for James. I'm happy that he's satisfied with what American Elf has accomplished. I'm happy that he's looking forward to the next chapter of his life. I'm happy that he's in a place where he's okay with moving on.
In today's strip, James writes, "I've got to remind myself that I'm not about to die. I'm just ending this comic strip. And I have a million branches, a million ideas, ready to spring to life." Whenever I think about James post-American Elf, his song "Why Is the Sky Blue?" starts playing in my head. Energetic guitar, silly and strangely philosophical lyrics, and, of course, lots of yelling. And that strip and that song, that's James Kochalka. That's American Elf. Being creative and silly and passionate. Asking questions and pursuing ideas. Moving forward, even when it's scary.
American Elf is ending, but that doesn't mean James is fading. It just means he's glowing brighter.
On one hand I'm sad. I'm really, really sad, because American Elf is this happy place for me. It's this place that's warm and fun and real; James is a real person who has real anxieties and failures and triumphs. He worries about things that are important and that are insignificant, and he finds joy in things that are huge and things that are tiny. I feel like James could just as easily be me or one of my best friends, and I'm sad that I won't get to share all the little moments that make up his life anymore.
But at the same time, I'm so excited for him. He's been doing American Elf for 15 years. 15 years! That's roughly 5,475 strips! I can't imagine what that must be like, to produce something each and every day for over a decade, let alone something that's based on some of the most intimate moments of my life.
Of course I can't speak for James, but I can only guess that American Elf has been both a boon and a burden for him. That's 15 years of daily reflection. Reflection can be therapeutic, but it can also be very, very painful. Routine can be steadying, but it can also be monotonous. He's considered ending American Elf several times over the years, but in the end he's always changed his mind. Something made him consider stopping, and something made him keep going. And now something has made him consider stopping, and he's made the decision to stop.
And what that says to me isn't that he's out of ideas or being lazy or abandoning his strip or his readers. What that says to me is that James has gotten out of American Elf all that he can or wants to get out of it right now. He's ready to conclude this chapter of his life and to move onto other things. He's still conflicted about finishing American Elf-- he mentions it all the time in his strips since making the announcement-- but in some way, he must be at peace with it. This must feel like the right time. I can only imagine how scary and life-changing this must be, and James has all of my respect for having the courage and grace to go through with it.
So maybe my feelings aren't that conflicted. Because yeah, I'm going to miss James. I'm going to miss Amy and Eli and Oliver. I'm going to miss Jason X-12 and Spandy and Nooko. But more than that, I'm happy for James. I'm happy that he's satisfied with what American Elf has accomplished. I'm happy that he's looking forward to the next chapter of his life. I'm happy that he's in a place where he's okay with moving on.
In today's strip, James writes, "I've got to remind myself that I'm not about to die. I'm just ending this comic strip. And I have a million branches, a million ideas, ready to spring to life." Whenever I think about James post-American Elf, his song "Why Is the Sky Blue?" starts playing in my head. Energetic guitar, silly and strangely philosophical lyrics, and, of course, lots of yelling. And that strip and that song, that's James Kochalka. That's American Elf. Being creative and silly and passionate. Asking questions and pursuing ideas. Moving forward, even when it's scary.
American Elf is ending, but that doesn't mean James is fading. It just means he's glowing brighter.