Running out of can
or "My wheelchair is a filthy liar 2: The slowening"
So yesterday, just as I closed the door before going off to see my doctor for the results of a bazillion tests, I realised I had locked my wallet and keys in the house.
After taking a moment to kick myself I sucked up my social anxiety and pride and went and asked my friendly neighbour to borrow some money. He lent me his smartrider (public transport pass) instead, which seemed just as good until I realised it was a concession one and thus could get me into trouble if I got checked. Stress!
Then the doctor diagnosed me with various things and told me to buy lots of expensive pills from weird places, as described on my health filter. And of course I couldn't pay for any of it. More stress! Also he said I should cut down my grains and just thinking about it made my tummy VERY SAD (I have tried this kind of dietary change before and it ended badly)
But I went to Cam's work and got the keys and didn't get arrested for not having a concession and went home and ate lots of bread and things seemed ok.
Today I woke up determined to go back to the doctors and pay for everything but my body said STAY IN BED GOING OUT IS BAD. "Don't be silly, body!" I replied "See, I'm putting my wallet in my bag right now, it won't be like yesterday!"
I noticed I'd forgotten to charge the wheelchair overnight so packed the charger, but didn't think I'd be going far enough that it would be an issue.
I noticed the power level looking a little sad when I arrived at the doctors so asked to charge it while I paid my $300+ for pills and medical fees SIGH. (These being maybe a third of the total set of pills I'm supposed to be taking. Per month. There may be some triage)
The meter seemed to go back to a mostly healthy level but I started being paranoid that the chair was going slower as I approached the train station. "Ah, don't be paranoid, self!" I thought.
And then as I drove up the 20m ramp it slowed to a crawl and started beeping sadly and a little spanner icon started flashing and it said it was down to like 20% power D: D: After shenanigans trying to get access to a power point at the station which are all too depressing to relate I took a chance on making it to the city, which worked THANK GOD, and I found myself surrounded with power points on every pillar POWER POINTS HAVE NEVER LOOKED SO BEAUTIFUL.
So I charged for a while then, my chair saying it had a moderate amount of power, drove to Seoul Cafe (a nearby Korean restaurant I like which is closing in TWO DAYS. If they had been closed today I think I would have cried) and charged some more at a another beautiful random power point, then drove back to the station.
As I approached another power pillar the chair started flashing ONE BAR OF SADNESS AT ME. And then, finally full of food and thus significantly more on the ball, I realised the charger hadn't made any noise at the last two power points, and that I'd been using the train station one wrong. OOPS. (Note that the chair claimed to have been charging the whole time and said it was back up to almost full power afterwards. THANKS FOR NOTHING, CHAIR)
So I made sure the chair was actually charging and sat and read my book for 20 minutes (as timed by trains) then caught the train back home and cautiously drove up the hill back home, the chair spending the whole trip claiming to be at full power and totally happy.
Once home I set it up to charge some more and set about organising my pills, only to realise I hadn't bought everything I'd meant to. Just thinking about going back to that surgery for a third day in a row makes me anxious, but I can feel the incomplete task nagging at me.
I took my first lot of new pills and collapsed asleep at 7:50pm and now it is midnight and I'm awake and my back itches and I'm paranoid it's the pills bluuuuuuuh.
Oh also I tried cheering myself up with Hulu but Hola stopped working so I can't watch anything (yes I tried turning it off and on again. May try restarting machine when I can be bothered)
So my money anxiety is rumbling. (Fixing wheelchairs isn't cheap either. Will ring manufacturer and see if this kind of weirdness is typical for batteries running low. YAY PHONE ANXIETY.) And I feel paranoid about leaving the house in the chair, and trapped at the idea of not ever leaving the house in the chair and dammit I wanted to see what happened at the end of Episode 2 of Dalja's Spring (33 year old woman gets much younger fake boyfriend, shenanigans ensue. I ASSUME).
I'm not actually SAD just irritable. No hugs! Though if this chair thing drags on I may ask people to come visit, I've been trying to claw back some semblance of a social life and now all my "ahhhhhh everyone will get sick of me ignoring them and I will be alllll alooone" extrovert-with-social-anxiety blah is rumbling too. (Dear everyone: I would spend more time with you all if I could)
Ok I'll stop whining now.
This entry was originally posted at http://alias-sqbr.dreamwidth.org/504010.html. There are
comments.
So yesterday, just as I closed the door before going off to see my doctor for the results of a bazillion tests, I realised I had locked my wallet and keys in the house.
After taking a moment to kick myself I sucked up my social anxiety and pride and went and asked my friendly neighbour to borrow some money. He lent me his smartrider (public transport pass) instead, which seemed just as good until I realised it was a concession one and thus could get me into trouble if I got checked. Stress!
Then the doctor diagnosed me with various things and told me to buy lots of expensive pills from weird places, as described on my health filter. And of course I couldn't pay for any of it. More stress! Also he said I should cut down my grains and just thinking about it made my tummy VERY SAD (I have tried this kind of dietary change before and it ended badly)
But I went to Cam's work and got the keys and didn't get arrested for not having a concession and went home and ate lots of bread and things seemed ok.
Today I woke up determined to go back to the doctors and pay for everything but my body said STAY IN BED GOING OUT IS BAD. "Don't be silly, body!" I replied "See, I'm putting my wallet in my bag right now, it won't be like yesterday!"
I noticed I'd forgotten to charge the wheelchair overnight so packed the charger, but didn't think I'd be going far enough that it would be an issue.
I noticed the power level looking a little sad when I arrived at the doctors so asked to charge it while I paid my $300+ for pills and medical fees SIGH. (These being maybe a third of the total set of pills I'm supposed to be taking. Per month. There may be some triage)
The meter seemed to go back to a mostly healthy level but I started being paranoid that the chair was going slower as I approached the train station. "Ah, don't be paranoid, self!" I thought.
And then as I drove up the 20m ramp it slowed to a crawl and started beeping sadly and a little spanner icon started flashing and it said it was down to like 20% power D: D: After shenanigans trying to get access to a power point at the station which are all too depressing to relate I took a chance on making it to the city, which worked THANK GOD, and I found myself surrounded with power points on every pillar POWER POINTS HAVE NEVER LOOKED SO BEAUTIFUL.
So I charged for a while then, my chair saying it had a moderate amount of power, drove to Seoul Cafe (a nearby Korean restaurant I like which is closing in TWO DAYS. If they had been closed today I think I would have cried) and charged some more at a another beautiful random power point, then drove back to the station.
As I approached another power pillar the chair started flashing ONE BAR OF SADNESS AT ME. And then, finally full of food and thus significantly more on the ball, I realised the charger hadn't made any noise at the last two power points, and that I'd been using the train station one wrong. OOPS. (Note that the chair claimed to have been charging the whole time and said it was back up to almost full power afterwards. THANKS FOR NOTHING, CHAIR)
So I made sure the chair was actually charging and sat and read my book for 20 minutes (as timed by trains) then caught the train back home and cautiously drove up the hill back home, the chair spending the whole trip claiming to be at full power and totally happy.
Once home I set it up to charge some more and set about organising my pills, only to realise I hadn't bought everything I'd meant to. Just thinking about going back to that surgery for a third day in a row makes me anxious, but I can feel the incomplete task nagging at me.
I took my first lot of new pills and collapsed asleep at 7:50pm and now it is midnight and I'm awake and my back itches and I'm paranoid it's the pills bluuuuuuuh.
Oh also I tried cheering myself up with Hulu but Hola stopped working so I can't watch anything (yes I tried turning it off and on again. May try restarting machine when I can be bothered)
So my money anxiety is rumbling. (Fixing wheelchairs isn't cheap either. Will ring manufacturer and see if this kind of weirdness is typical for batteries running low. YAY PHONE ANXIETY.) And I feel paranoid about leaving the house in the chair, and trapped at the idea of not ever leaving the house in the chair and dammit I wanted to see what happened at the end of Episode 2 of Dalja's Spring (33 year old woman gets much younger fake boyfriend, shenanigans ensue. I ASSUME).
I'm not actually SAD just irritable. No hugs! Though if this chair thing drags on I may ask people to come visit, I've been trying to claw back some semblance of a social life and now all my "ahhhhhh everyone will get sick of me ignoring them and I will be alllll alooone" extrovert-with-social-anxiety blah is rumbling too. (Dear everyone: I would spend more time with you all if I could)
Ok I'll stop whining now.
This entry was originally posted at http://alias-sqbr.dreamwidth.org/504010.html. There are
comments.