Bad people can just fucking die.
Okay, so first things off first---I got drunk a couple of nights ago. That wouldnt seem too bad, except for the idiotic fact that I did it around my parents.
Yeah, I know that I fucked up...I just thought I could hold it around my parents, but I was puking my ass off. This was all about 2 or 3 days ago...I've felt like shit since. Dad simply just didnt talk to me about it, which was a shocker cus I thought that he'd literally kill me. I guess he's just so pissed that he wont. Maybe he believes I learned my lesson through what Ive done...and I kind of did. See, because my friend Cry came over, and we we're all going to have Margaritas. And so I payed for them, my Evanescence DVD playing in the background. One. Four. Six. Eight. I had had eight drinks of margaritas that night, the last two we're straight tequila(dont tell my mom that I had 8. She thinks I had 6.I snuck them all in.)
I puked hardcore.
I woke up the next day at about noon with the biggest hangover. There was alot of shit that was going through my mind as I drank that night...
Fuck.
Like my life, about how I feel, why I am the way I am...Friends. Love. Existance. People in general. Hatred. Lonliness.
I didnt want to have to feel any of it. Words cannot discribe how painful my depression can get...but I should never use that as an excuse to drink.
...
Okay, maybe I can.
There's something about this place...that i need to get away from. I thought that I was going to...but Kris lost his job, and now im once again grounded. I had my hopes up high for an idea.Ontop of that, Vanessa doesnt want to be my friend pretty much. I called her.
It's all to personal to go into depth with right now, but...it just sucks. I know why she's been so distant...but then again, how can she be so goddamn quick to detatch herself from a good friend of three long years.
It makes me wonder...
Whatever. %^&* &*#.
Work...has been work, but at liest I make time to call people when I can. But perhaps...even in then; I can annoy them.
I care...and that is my problem.
Random Thought Bunny Corner (ADD disorder)-
I just need to have a break. I work 12pm till like 7pm tommorrow, then im OFF again. I want to go to Hot Topic and liberate myself with shirts-lol. Tool and A Perfect Circle.Ontop of that, the weather is getting hotter out here...either that, or I ran into a heat wave yesterday, cus it was pretty goddamn warm. I must by some A-shirts. Ontop of that, I found out my buddy at work, Joy, is leaving Frys (my job/work) cus' she has to go back home in Penn for personal reasons. It sucks, im going to miss her. She said that she'll be back in October.I can barely talk or sing from getting drunk, I burned my throat with my own stomach acid. Since I havent drawn in a couple of weeks, im loosing it a bit. I need to practice to get back up to par and beyond. I miss Kim and Vanessa.
People as beautiful and hurtful as you are the reason why people like me want to be better enough to blow you away...
Blow you the fuck away...with the power and extent of my soul
.
Yeah, I know that I fucked up...I just thought I could hold it around my parents, but I was puking my ass off. This was all about 2 or 3 days ago...I've felt like shit since. Dad simply just didnt talk to me about it, which was a shocker cus I thought that he'd literally kill me. I guess he's just so pissed that he wont. Maybe he believes I learned my lesson through what Ive done...and I kind of did. See, because my friend Cry came over, and we we're all going to have Margaritas. And so I payed for them, my Evanescence DVD playing in the background. One. Four. Six. Eight. I had had eight drinks of margaritas that night, the last two we're straight tequila(dont tell my mom that I had 8. She thinks I had 6.I snuck them all in.)
I puked hardcore.
I woke up the next day at about noon with the biggest hangover. There was alot of shit that was going through my mind as I drank that night...
Fuck.
Like my life, about how I feel, why I am the way I am...Friends. Love. Existance. People in general. Hatred. Lonliness.
I didnt want to have to feel any of it. Words cannot discribe how painful my depression can get...but I should never use that as an excuse to drink.
...
Okay, maybe I can.
There's something about this place...that i need to get away from. I thought that I was going to...but Kris lost his job, and now im once again grounded. I had my hopes up high for an idea.Ontop of that, Vanessa doesnt want to be my friend pretty much. I called her.
It's all to personal to go into depth with right now, but...it just sucks. I know why she's been so distant...but then again, how can she be so goddamn quick to detatch herself from a good friend of three long years.
It makes me wonder...
Whatever. %^&* &*#.
Work...has been work, but at liest I make time to call people when I can. But perhaps...even in then; I can annoy them.
I care...and that is my problem.
Random Thought Bunny Corner (ADD disorder)-
I just need to have a break. I work 12pm till like 7pm tommorrow, then im OFF again. I want to go to Hot Topic and liberate myself with shirts-lol. Tool and A Perfect Circle.Ontop of that, the weather is getting hotter out here...either that, or I ran into a heat wave yesterday, cus it was pretty goddamn warm. I must by some A-shirts. Ontop of that, I found out my buddy at work, Joy, is leaving Frys (my job/work) cus' she has to go back home in Penn for personal reasons. It sucks, im going to miss her. She said that she'll be back in October.I can barely talk or sing from getting drunk, I burned my throat with my own stomach acid. Since I havent drawn in a couple of weeks, im loosing it a bit. I need to practice to get back up to par and beyond. I miss Kim and Vanessa.
People as beautiful and hurtful as you are the reason why people like me want to be better enough to blow you away...
Blow you the fuck away...with the power and extent of my soul
.