Sam's entry

Feb 06, 2005 16:00

I just got off the phone with my good friend Sam.
Baaghhhh...she lives all the way in Florida now >_<. The last I had seen her was near eight months ago, when my world ended and was reborn in a graduation from high school. She's still Sam, ya know, and thats good. Ill give you the low down, from what I remember, of her appearance. She's about 17 (looks 19), has long, straight, black hair to a little below her shoulders. She has really fair skin--not like pale, but fine and light colored, like a doll :P. In actuality, she has brown, wavy hair, nicely colored, but she has since changed it. Her smile and laugh is contagious, one in which she only gives to those that deserve it. Call it wierd, but she has nice cheeks when she smiles. It is one of her defining features. The second would have to be her attitude-lol. She isnt like most girls, ooohhhhh no--her's is sarcastic, and she can be sharp, and witty. But she's not entirely all of that. She can be caring, hilarious, and just plain nice company. I miss her. This conversation was cool, even though I was a dork that couldnt fix up a complete sentince that came out my mouth-lol. She understood, as when she met me I was quite an open and hyperactive individual-lol. I met her in...Junior year, I believe. Following into my Senior year, theyre had always been the threat that she was going to move. I wouldnt really think of it much until I began to miss her. That is...I would not see her, if likely, ever again. My current week was nuts, with only one day off. All of that shit...and only one day off. All I have to say is that I hope this check im getting is worth it. Work wasnt nice yesrerday...it was miserable. It was hell.
She was watching 'The Grudge' with her boyfriend Rick when I called. Ooops. But she said it was okay, and then I got to talk to Rick, and he was actually a pretty cool guy. He loves to draw as well, in which Sam months before told me when I called her "he likes to draw as well. He kind of reminds me of you like that"--which I thought was the biggest compliment from her. He also works at a packaging center, ya know, products for the truckers. He'd work in meat dept. if he could, but he said that he wan't 18 (he's 17 too).
Sam told me school was good, what Rick looked like, the old life in Agua Fria, the band Tool and A Perfect Circle. Sam is awesome...baagh, just from the way I talk about her you can see how much I admire her. The point of this entry was to document something that might never happen again, and that is talking to friends who might be gone with the blink of an eye... or loosing touch with a good friend. I am barely able to contact her as it is...and I dont think whats going on right now is important as much as How she has affected me in the past. She got me Hooked on Tool and A Perfect Circle. Also, a long story short--I used to know a friend whose name was Sam before her. They we're near identical to each other...but I had lost contact with the old one...so where the old one faded, a new one was put in, to not make things seem so bad, even though now as I think about it I dearly miss the old one as well. The old Sam that I knew first was a good friend of mine at a small apartment complex. For the 2 months I knew her, it felt like we had been for years. We got along great, almost too well, in fact. Im sure that if we found each other again, we'd...have something. But alas, life has to make things difficult. Life is a set of "hit or miss" situations. This one had potential, and it was a miss...--but that doesnt mean that it cant be hit off again. This Sam that I talk about now...--sure--she had her similarities, which was nuts, but theyre goes that feeling...that one where you know a friendship has the mark of something that could fade and get lost at any moment. Following in the line of the older Sam, she might as well be lost to the wind.
Again, she has changed me. I still greatly desire to see her, but what can you do, ya know? I have to train my mind, that those you favor the most--friends--wont always be around, because someday they wont be. I have to train my mind not to feel for those that have changed me forever and are now dissolved. But I do feel, and that is what this entry is about. Both of the Sam's have been a part of my life, one beautiful and original in its memory that I wouldnt trade for anything in the world. I love them, in whatever form of that affection that may be...I do.
I can say that I am happy that she is with a good boyfriend. Rick sounds shy, but she is happy with him, so thats great. Sam deserves to be loved because she is a great person ^_*. I told her that 'Rick is cool. Im glad that I got to talk to him, because now I know that you are in the right hands.' It felt really good to say that, because thats exactly how I felt, and theyre was nothing to pick apart anything out as being bad in it.
...So I hold onto what I can...but dont forget them...but do not mourn...but remember thier affect...:P...
This is Sam's entry.


-This is a picture of Sam, the one currently in Florida. I took this days before graduation. I know I know, its a bad picture, but what can you do, ya know? By the way, her hand was wrapped because she had burnt it on hot cheeze. The smiling man in the corner is her now ex-boyfriend, whom I delightfully cut off from this picture. This picture doesnt do her justice...but, she is wearing red:). The Sam I knew wore mostly blacks with "Tool" inscribed on it. Yay, lookit me--I got a picture of Sam (*never takes pictures of anything*). Cool. *Hugs picture*
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