Aaaaarghmmmmmf.
What does your stress sound like?
I am taking some time out of a very fearsome and very due project on siberian reindeer herders to vent some of my anguish out into the internets.
I am so very very confused.
Here is what i want to do with my life: Write television.
Here is the problem: So far, what the writing program at Uvic has taught me is that I am an overwritten, untalented jerk-off.
So I see my options, there being two of them at the moment, like this:
A) I could suffer through three more years of UVic writing (supposing my grades are good enough to get into the program, which, thanks C, they might not be.) learning about how crappy i am at everything and generally ruining my self-esteem by getting objective grades on something that is not meant to be evalutated as such.
OR
B) I could skip this step, do my bachelors degree in Anthropology, my other one true love, be finished in two more years, (only two!), and from there apply to the Vancouver Film School, having no idea whether or not my writing will actually be quality or not. Whether they will say "Hey, come on in!" or "Seriously? Are you kidding us with this?"
The nice thing, and the thing that I know, is that I always have a choice in what I want to do. The problem is knowing what you want to do, but not knowing if you're actually good enough to do it. I'd settle for mediocre! I know you improve over time and with practice but at the moment things are seeming very futile and confusing. Maybe It's because it's the end of the year, and maybe it's because i'm being crushed under the weight of the ever-looming thunderdome, but I'm getting totally frazzled.
So I guess I have until June to decide what to do with myself, as that's when I will pick my courses for next year.
I am, however, very excited for these things: Primatology! Osteology! Forensic such-and-such! Only having to take one more cultural anthro class EVER if i so choose! Archaeology! The Stone Age! Paleolithic Art! Trying to convince my history major friends that prehistory is SO much cooler!
I often really wish that Anthropology was what I wanted to do as a job. But it is not.
On the flipside (where I shall be catching the few of you who read this) I am really enjoying knitting. I think soon I will make a knitting post with all my knitting accomplishments. I just finished a hat for my dad's birthday. Plus I made my very first sock, only to find out from my mom that I was doin' it wrong. But I'll get it next time. Yay!
P.S. Jess's visit was THE AWESOMEST. I am very excited for this summer. Providing I am able to find shelter and some sort of (preferably) barista/waitress/prepcook work.
P.P.S. You were right, Jess, I should have gotten layers long ago.
Oh! Raines starts on thursday! Jeff Goldblum is a detective who solves murders by chatting up figmented versions of the victims. Nutty! Quirky! Cool! I hope.
I would mention that Andy Barker P.I. is also starting thursday but I saw a preview and i'm not so sure about it. We'll see. I mean, Tony Hale costars, so i'll give it a chance.
Okay, back to Siberia.
I am taking some time out of a very fearsome and very due project on siberian reindeer herders to vent some of my anguish out into the internets.
I am so very very confused.
Here is what i want to do with my life: Write television.
Here is the problem: So far, what the writing program at Uvic has taught me is that I am an overwritten, untalented jerk-off.
So I see my options, there being two of them at the moment, like this:
A) I could suffer through three more years of UVic writing (supposing my grades are good enough to get into the program, which, thanks C, they might not be.) learning about how crappy i am at everything and generally ruining my self-esteem by getting objective grades on something that is not meant to be evalutated as such.
OR
B) I could skip this step, do my bachelors degree in Anthropology, my other one true love, be finished in two more years, (only two!), and from there apply to the Vancouver Film School, having no idea whether or not my writing will actually be quality or not. Whether they will say "Hey, come on in!" or "Seriously? Are you kidding us with this?"
The nice thing, and the thing that I know, is that I always have a choice in what I want to do. The problem is knowing what you want to do, but not knowing if you're actually good enough to do it. I'd settle for mediocre! I know you improve over time and with practice but at the moment things are seeming very futile and confusing. Maybe It's because it's the end of the year, and maybe it's because i'm being crushed under the weight of the ever-looming thunderdome, but I'm getting totally frazzled.
So I guess I have until June to decide what to do with myself, as that's when I will pick my courses for next year.
I am, however, very excited for these things: Primatology! Osteology! Forensic such-and-such! Only having to take one more cultural anthro class EVER if i so choose! Archaeology! The Stone Age! Paleolithic Art! Trying to convince my history major friends that prehistory is SO much cooler!
I often really wish that Anthropology was what I wanted to do as a job. But it is not.
On the flipside (where I shall be catching the few of you who read this) I am really enjoying knitting. I think soon I will make a knitting post with all my knitting accomplishments. I just finished a hat for my dad's birthday. Plus I made my very first sock, only to find out from my mom that I was doin' it wrong. But I'll get it next time. Yay!
P.S. Jess's visit was THE AWESOMEST. I am very excited for this summer. Providing I am able to find shelter and some sort of (preferably) barista/waitress/prepcook work.
P.P.S. You were right, Jess, I should have gotten layers long ago.
Oh! Raines starts on thursday! Jeff Goldblum is a detective who solves murders by chatting up figmented versions of the victims. Nutty! Quirky! Cool! I hope.
I would mention that Andy Barker P.I. is also starting thursday but I saw a preview and i'm not so sure about it. We'll see. I mean, Tony Hale costars, so i'll give it a chance.
Okay, back to Siberia.