Let me tell you a tale...
As promised, here is the Tale of The Groucho:
I didn't mention when I posted on Sunday that I had been having a few pains on and off all day and that I could feel that things had moved downwards inside.
We went into the hospital as scheduled on Sunday evening and they got me hooked up to the monitor by about half past nine. Groucho's heart rate was a bit all over the place and they were a little concerned by how fast it was going. The baby was clearly really active inside, but at the same time its heart was racing up to 190 bpm every so often and they were struggling to get a base line.
They kept me on the monitor and the doctors came to check the trace. They eventually examined me at about 11.30pm and straight away said they were going to break my waters. I was, unexpectedly, already at 3cms by that point, and they weren't having a busy night and with the baby's heart going a little nuts it seemed like a good idea to get going sooner rather than later.
It really hurt when they broke my waters, but the lichor was clear, no meconium that they could find so they were pleased with that. When you have meconium stained lichor it means the baby is in distress and has soiled itself. It's generally not a good sign.
They moved me down to the labour ward and got me started on some IV fluids as they thought maybe I was a little dehydrated and that was what was causing the baby to go tachycardic. It was decided that they would leave me go on my own for a few hours and if I hadn't dilated further by 2 am they'd stick me on a syntocinon drip to get things rocking.
The contractions started to come, but they weren't too bad, just nice easy start of labour type contractions. By 2am when they next examined me, they were in a nice regular pattern. Strong but not as many per minute as they needed, and I was still only at 3cms, so they put the synto drip up and we started the augmentation process.
Once the drip was in the midwife, Elizabeth, stayed with me from then on. She was lovely, she talked with me in between contractions. Jake slept in an armchair, every so often I could hear a faint snore from him. They suggested I should try and get some sleep but it's a little difficult to doze when every couple of minutes your body starts spasming itself. But at that point I was feeling pretty good, the contractions were stronger now but the gas and air and my breathing were still enough to let me get through.
By 6am I was really going. Each contraction was really strong, and they were coming closer and closer together. Elisabeth and I were feeling really positive, she was convinced the baby was not too far away, she was hoping to get to deliver it before the end of her shift. Then she examined me and I'd only moved on by 1 cm. They upped the dosage from the drip again and I kept going. A really lovely student midwife, Pamela, came to sit with me as I think Elisabeth needed to go on a break, she'd been with me for hours by that stage, only leaving briefly to assist another lady who was struggling with her first baby. Again, she kept talking to me, helping me focus through the pain, keeping my head clear. I found it really helped me to get through the contraction, waiting till the pain was over to finish a sentence or hear the next part of what she had to say.
The shift changed and a lady named Alison took over my care. She also had a student with her, Sarah, and the two of them were just great. Again, really calm and really positive. Really gentle with me, talking through with me what was happening, telling me about themselves, asking me questions, anything to help me stay focused through the process. By 8am or thereabouts, I was in an incredible amount of pain and eventually asked for some pethedene, just to help me through the worst of it.
The pethedene made things really weird just after they put it in. I had a contraction almost straight away and the pain seemed to shatter and spread everywhere, it was a really bright golden orange colour and it filled the whole room. It felt like that contraction lasted for an eternity. The first few after the injection were like that, but soon I found I was able to focus again, I could concentrate on what I was doing and think again, inbetween the pains.
They examined me at 10am, and I was only 5cms along. The pains had increased again and the pethedene was no longer helping, the gas and air wasn't even touching the sides of it. It felt like there was a sharp twisting in my gut every time. The strength and length of the contractions was incredible, each one was hitting upwards of 70 on the monitor, I had a few that were pushing up into the 90s, which is intense, I can tell you. I was doubled over by each one, afterwards I just felt wrung out, limp and sweaty, waiting for the next one which was never more than about 90 seconds away. They'd stopped increasing the dose of synto by this point because there was no need to push it, the pains were so strong.
The consultant came to see me, they were concerned by how tired I was getting, by how slow the labour was, that I was only at 5cms after so long. He was really gentle but he warned me that if I wasn't further along by the time of the next examination, they would have to consider a caesarian. They couldn't risk leaving me like that for too much longer, it wasn't good for me or the baby and they really needed to get the baby out soon.
I was pretty distrait at this point. The pains were beyond anything I had with Orlaith, things were rapidly spinning out of my control, they were coming so fast that I couldn't catch my breath or think. I had to plan toilet breaks ahead because there was no way I could handle more than one or two without pain relief of some kind.
The sister came, her name was Irma, a much older lady, I think maybe West Indian. She talked me through epidurals, explaining my options clearly and gently, not trying to pressure me either way, just making it clear for me that I would only be able to have one more dose of the pethedene and that if I didn't have an epi soon I might not be able to have one at all, because I wouldn't be able to hold still in the curled position they need you in to puncture your back. She was obviously concerned for me, but she didn't want to force my hand one way or the other.
After about ten more minutes I caved in and agreed to the epidural. I was so tired by this point.
The anaesthetist came by about quarter past 11. They sat me up with a pillow on my lap. The contractions came while I was sitting there, and I could feel a change in the way the pain moved, driving down through me into the ground. I curled over round the pillow, they washed my back and gave me a local, then popped the needle in, in between contractions. The line was attached, they laid me down and gave me a button to push if I wanted to "top up".
Took about half an hour to really calm me down, but by 12pm my mind was starting to clear again. The pains were coming down through my backside now, a real feeling of pressure building in my tail bone. I told Alison, she checked with Irma and they examined me again at 12.30pm and sure enough I was at 10cms, fully dilated. They said to wait for an hour or so, just to give things time to move down slowly and easily by themselves, and then I could start to push.
Sure enough, 1.30 rolled around and they helped me into position, clutching my thighs, and on each contraction 3 pushes. Draw in a breath, hold it and force everything down through your bottom. You have to focus everything you've got on your arse! Another breath in, hold and push, then a third and you can breathe again and relax your body a little.
Then the next pain comes, more breathing, more pushing. I'd dialled down the epi in the hour before I started pushing, you do that so you can feel enough to know when to push.
The two midwives and Jake were shouting encouragement through each bout of pushing. I was working so hard, but I felt like nothing was happening. I could feel the baby's head right through my backside and it felt so BIG.
It sounds really weird but the pain and pressure felt like a boot! It felt like there was a boot trying to push its way out, and it was stuck. I couldn't get it past a certain point. I was trying really hard, but it just felt stuck.
By this stage I'd only been pushing for twenty five minutes, it felt like less and at the same time like longer, like I'd been wrapped around the pain forever. I was getting so tired by now.
I didn't realise until after but they were starting to get worried about Groucho's heart rate, it was decelerating and eventually, not long before she came out, they lost it completely. I was trying to tell them to help me, eventually they had to cut me and once the episiotomy was done, that was it, one or two more big pushes from me and I felt its head POP free. She slithered out and they popped her on my belly.
She was blue and white and the cord was wrapped around her neck when she came out. She whimpered a little, but no cry. They whipped her away and onto the table and were calling for a crash team and suddenly everything was happening at normal speed again, and there were a load of people in the room.
She started to wail and I relaxed and then suddenly just felt a couple of huge great gushes and suddenly everyone was crowding around me, talking about a pph, massaging my stomach, and generally bustling. I just kind of lay back in the middle of it, feeling exhausted and a little confused. I knew I was having a haemorrhage, I just couldn't bring myself to worry about it, other than in a vague way. I had no energy left.
They eventually stopped the bleeding and managed to get the placenta out and the baby was fine and after a while, everyone left us alone and I got to see her for the first time. She was beautiful and so BIG! She weighed in at 9lbs and 7 ounces, where Orlaith was 8 lbs. A bit of a jump upwards. Her head was 37 cms (Orlaith's was 33 or 34) and she also had her right arm up in front of her face as she was coming out, hence the feeling of her being stuck, I think.
After a long time they came back and stitched me up. It took a long time, there was a lot of blood and a lot of swelling. Alison told me that I was the first person she'd ever had to do an episiotomy on. The hospital's policy is that they try to not do them, they find tears heal better and cause less trauma. She did a good job though and Sheree, the lady who stitched me up, did a really good job on the stitches I think, given how swollen I was already.
And after that they told me I'd lost about a litre or so of blood and they'd have to do tests to see if I needed a transfusion and so forth. But I just didn't care because it was all over. We stayed in the delivery suite for a long time until they were happy that I could be moved and then we went up to Maternity and it really was all over.
So yeah, that was that. We had to stay in extra time because she was jaundiced and they stuck her in a hot box under a couple of big photo treatment lights. As you can see in the photos, she had to wear nowt but her nappy and a pair of goggles to stop the light getting into her eyes. That was pretty horrible, they made me 'top her up' with formula which made me a bit cranky, and I couldn't get her out other than to feed her or change her nappy. But eventually they let us out, yesterday and we got home at about half past five.
I have to take antibiotics and I'm on iron tablets for at least the next six weeks. I am really tired and today all my muscles hurt. My back, hips and pelvis are really starting to hurt today too, so I've got to get in touch with the physio department and make an appointment with them to get it all checked out.
And now
Given it was 2am in this photo and I was starting on synto at this point, I am looking remarkably cheery. The little box beside me is the machine that measures the rate of the syntocinon drip feed. The two black bands around my belly are for the ctg monitor which measures the baby's heart rate and contractions and such. It makes you feel like a rolled joint of meat.
We didn't take any others while I was in labour, it was too intense this time. So the rest are all post labour.
Here she is, looking all calm and peaceful with her giant cranium of DOOM...
She looks a lot like Orlaith in this pic. Her eyes aren't quite as ENORMOUS as Orlaith's but there is a strong resemblance. To me, anyway.
When she first came out her hands and feet (and everything else) were a kind of dusky purple colour, but they gradually regained a normal skin tone, after about 24 hours.
This was about the first time I'd seen her, it was about ten or fifteen minutes after the event, she was still naked under the towel. They hadn't had a chance to weigh her or anything yet.
The first feed :->
The lovely Alison, weighing Esme.
Esme lying like a little fish and tupping the scales at 9lb 7. It looks like 6 in the photos, but it was 7. Believe me.
Jake with his new daughter. Once he was allowed to hold her I could hear him wandering around muttering all kinds of cute, goofy things to her. He's so cute! I love the way she is looking at him in this picture. She was taking a really good look at his face whilst he was cuddling her and she really likes being held by him.
The lovely Sarah, student midwife, who actually delivered Esme. Esme was her 35th delivery, she scored her 36th not long after! They have to do a certain number of deliveries in order to qualify, I was more than happy to help and she did an amazing job!
Here she is reclining in her photo treatment box with her goggles. She bloody hated being in there, and screamed every time I put her back in. I don't blame her, but it did do the trick in the end and her BR levels came back down fairly quickly once they got two lamps on her.
This was Orlaith's first visit to the hospital and you can see how enchanted she is with Esme. She was beautiful with her. She wanted to hold her hand and give her kisses!
When I got Esme out of the box, I was saying things like "Here we go, little chick" and so on, when I put her down in front of Orlaith, the first thing she said was "Oh, hello little chick!"
Classic.
She was very very happy to see us when we came home yesterday and there has been a lot of showing Esme her toys and putting of various items into the Moses basket for Esme. And lots of snuggling of Mummy and a few tears when Mummy was giving Esme her booba and Orlaith wanted to join in and was told she couldn't try some. Oh dear...
There's a few breastfeeding pics in there, so don't click if that kind of thing offends, or if you're at work or whatever. /Warning.
I didn't mention when I posted on Sunday that I had been having a few pains on and off all day and that I could feel that things had moved downwards inside.
We went into the hospital as scheduled on Sunday evening and they got me hooked up to the monitor by about half past nine. Groucho's heart rate was a bit all over the place and they were a little concerned by how fast it was going. The baby was clearly really active inside, but at the same time its heart was racing up to 190 bpm every so often and they were struggling to get a base line.
They kept me on the monitor and the doctors came to check the trace. They eventually examined me at about 11.30pm and straight away said they were going to break my waters. I was, unexpectedly, already at 3cms by that point, and they weren't having a busy night and with the baby's heart going a little nuts it seemed like a good idea to get going sooner rather than later.
It really hurt when they broke my waters, but the lichor was clear, no meconium that they could find so they were pleased with that. When you have meconium stained lichor it means the baby is in distress and has soiled itself. It's generally not a good sign.
They moved me down to the labour ward and got me started on some IV fluids as they thought maybe I was a little dehydrated and that was what was causing the baby to go tachycardic. It was decided that they would leave me go on my own for a few hours and if I hadn't dilated further by 2 am they'd stick me on a syntocinon drip to get things rocking.
The contractions started to come, but they weren't too bad, just nice easy start of labour type contractions. By 2am when they next examined me, they were in a nice regular pattern. Strong but not as many per minute as they needed, and I was still only at 3cms, so they put the synto drip up and we started the augmentation process.
Once the drip was in the midwife, Elizabeth, stayed with me from then on. She was lovely, she talked with me in between contractions. Jake slept in an armchair, every so often I could hear a faint snore from him. They suggested I should try and get some sleep but it's a little difficult to doze when every couple of minutes your body starts spasming itself. But at that point I was feeling pretty good, the contractions were stronger now but the gas and air and my breathing were still enough to let me get through.
By 6am I was really going. Each contraction was really strong, and they were coming closer and closer together. Elisabeth and I were feeling really positive, she was convinced the baby was not too far away, she was hoping to get to deliver it before the end of her shift. Then she examined me and I'd only moved on by 1 cm. They upped the dosage from the drip again and I kept going. A really lovely student midwife, Pamela, came to sit with me as I think Elisabeth needed to go on a break, she'd been with me for hours by that stage, only leaving briefly to assist another lady who was struggling with her first baby. Again, she kept talking to me, helping me focus through the pain, keeping my head clear. I found it really helped me to get through the contraction, waiting till the pain was over to finish a sentence or hear the next part of what she had to say.
The shift changed and a lady named Alison took over my care. She also had a student with her, Sarah, and the two of them were just great. Again, really calm and really positive. Really gentle with me, talking through with me what was happening, telling me about themselves, asking me questions, anything to help me stay focused through the process. By 8am or thereabouts, I was in an incredible amount of pain and eventually asked for some pethedene, just to help me through the worst of it.
The pethedene made things really weird just after they put it in. I had a contraction almost straight away and the pain seemed to shatter and spread everywhere, it was a really bright golden orange colour and it filled the whole room. It felt like that contraction lasted for an eternity. The first few after the injection were like that, but soon I found I was able to focus again, I could concentrate on what I was doing and think again, inbetween the pains.
They examined me at 10am, and I was only 5cms along. The pains had increased again and the pethedene was no longer helping, the gas and air wasn't even touching the sides of it. It felt like there was a sharp twisting in my gut every time. The strength and length of the contractions was incredible, each one was hitting upwards of 70 on the monitor, I had a few that were pushing up into the 90s, which is intense, I can tell you. I was doubled over by each one, afterwards I just felt wrung out, limp and sweaty, waiting for the next one which was never more than about 90 seconds away. They'd stopped increasing the dose of synto by this point because there was no need to push it, the pains were so strong.
The consultant came to see me, they were concerned by how tired I was getting, by how slow the labour was, that I was only at 5cms after so long. He was really gentle but he warned me that if I wasn't further along by the time of the next examination, they would have to consider a caesarian. They couldn't risk leaving me like that for too much longer, it wasn't good for me or the baby and they really needed to get the baby out soon.
I was pretty distrait at this point. The pains were beyond anything I had with Orlaith, things were rapidly spinning out of my control, they were coming so fast that I couldn't catch my breath or think. I had to plan toilet breaks ahead because there was no way I could handle more than one or two without pain relief of some kind.
The sister came, her name was Irma, a much older lady, I think maybe West Indian. She talked me through epidurals, explaining my options clearly and gently, not trying to pressure me either way, just making it clear for me that I would only be able to have one more dose of the pethedene and that if I didn't have an epi soon I might not be able to have one at all, because I wouldn't be able to hold still in the curled position they need you in to puncture your back. She was obviously concerned for me, but she didn't want to force my hand one way or the other.
After about ten more minutes I caved in and agreed to the epidural. I was so tired by this point.
The anaesthetist came by about quarter past 11. They sat me up with a pillow on my lap. The contractions came while I was sitting there, and I could feel a change in the way the pain moved, driving down through me into the ground. I curled over round the pillow, they washed my back and gave me a local, then popped the needle in, in between contractions. The line was attached, they laid me down and gave me a button to push if I wanted to "top up".
Took about half an hour to really calm me down, but by 12pm my mind was starting to clear again. The pains were coming down through my backside now, a real feeling of pressure building in my tail bone. I told Alison, she checked with Irma and they examined me again at 12.30pm and sure enough I was at 10cms, fully dilated. They said to wait for an hour or so, just to give things time to move down slowly and easily by themselves, and then I could start to push.
Sure enough, 1.30 rolled around and they helped me into position, clutching my thighs, and on each contraction 3 pushes. Draw in a breath, hold it and force everything down through your bottom. You have to focus everything you've got on your arse! Another breath in, hold and push, then a third and you can breathe again and relax your body a little.
Then the next pain comes, more breathing, more pushing. I'd dialled down the epi in the hour before I started pushing, you do that so you can feel enough to know when to push.
The two midwives and Jake were shouting encouragement through each bout of pushing. I was working so hard, but I felt like nothing was happening. I could feel the baby's head right through my backside and it felt so BIG.
It sounds really weird but the pain and pressure felt like a boot! It felt like there was a boot trying to push its way out, and it was stuck. I couldn't get it past a certain point. I was trying really hard, but it just felt stuck.
By this stage I'd only been pushing for twenty five minutes, it felt like less and at the same time like longer, like I'd been wrapped around the pain forever. I was getting so tired by now.
I didn't realise until after but they were starting to get worried about Groucho's heart rate, it was decelerating and eventually, not long before she came out, they lost it completely. I was trying to tell them to help me, eventually they had to cut me and once the episiotomy was done, that was it, one or two more big pushes from me and I felt its head POP free. She slithered out and they popped her on my belly.
She was blue and white and the cord was wrapped around her neck when she came out. She whimpered a little, but no cry. They whipped her away and onto the table and were calling for a crash team and suddenly everything was happening at normal speed again, and there were a load of people in the room.
She started to wail and I relaxed and then suddenly just felt a couple of huge great gushes and suddenly everyone was crowding around me, talking about a pph, massaging my stomach, and generally bustling. I just kind of lay back in the middle of it, feeling exhausted and a little confused. I knew I was having a haemorrhage, I just couldn't bring myself to worry about it, other than in a vague way. I had no energy left.
They eventually stopped the bleeding and managed to get the placenta out and the baby was fine and after a while, everyone left us alone and I got to see her for the first time. She was beautiful and so BIG! She weighed in at 9lbs and 7 ounces, where Orlaith was 8 lbs. A bit of a jump upwards. Her head was 37 cms (Orlaith's was 33 or 34) and she also had her right arm up in front of her face as she was coming out, hence the feeling of her being stuck, I think.
After a long time they came back and stitched me up. It took a long time, there was a lot of blood and a lot of swelling. Alison told me that I was the first person she'd ever had to do an episiotomy on. The hospital's policy is that they try to not do them, they find tears heal better and cause less trauma. She did a good job though and Sheree, the lady who stitched me up, did a really good job on the stitches I think, given how swollen I was already.
And after that they told me I'd lost about a litre or so of blood and they'd have to do tests to see if I needed a transfusion and so forth. But I just didn't care because it was all over. We stayed in the delivery suite for a long time until they were happy that I could be moved and then we went up to Maternity and it really was all over.
So yeah, that was that. We had to stay in extra time because she was jaundiced and they stuck her in a hot box under a couple of big photo treatment lights. As you can see in the photos, she had to wear nowt but her nappy and a pair of goggles to stop the light getting into her eyes. That was pretty horrible, they made me 'top her up' with formula which made me a bit cranky, and I couldn't get her out other than to feed her or change her nappy. But eventually they let us out, yesterday and we got home at about half past five.
I have to take antibiotics and I'm on iron tablets for at least the next six weeks. I am really tired and today all my muscles hurt. My back, hips and pelvis are really starting to hurt today too, so I've got to get in touch with the physio department and make an appointment with them to get it all checked out.
And now
Given it was 2am in this photo and I was starting on synto at this point, I am looking remarkably cheery. The little box beside me is the machine that measures the rate of the syntocinon drip feed. The two black bands around my belly are for the ctg monitor which measures the baby's heart rate and contractions and such. It makes you feel like a rolled joint of meat.
We didn't take any others while I was in labour, it was too intense this time. So the rest are all post labour.
Here she is, looking all calm and peaceful with her giant cranium of DOOM...
She looks a lot like Orlaith in this pic. Her eyes aren't quite as ENORMOUS as Orlaith's but there is a strong resemblance. To me, anyway.
When she first came out her hands and feet (and everything else) were a kind of dusky purple colour, but they gradually regained a normal skin tone, after about 24 hours.
This was about the first time I'd seen her, it was about ten or fifteen minutes after the event, she was still naked under the towel. They hadn't had a chance to weigh her or anything yet.
The first feed :->
The lovely Alison, weighing Esme.
Esme lying like a little fish and tupping the scales at 9lb 7. It looks like 6 in the photos, but it was 7. Believe me.
Jake with his new daughter. Once he was allowed to hold her I could hear him wandering around muttering all kinds of cute, goofy things to her. He's so cute! I love the way she is looking at him in this picture. She was taking a really good look at his face whilst he was cuddling her and she really likes being held by him.
The lovely Sarah, student midwife, who actually delivered Esme. Esme was her 35th delivery, she scored her 36th not long after! They have to do a certain number of deliveries in order to qualify, I was more than happy to help and she did an amazing job!
Here she is reclining in her photo treatment box with her goggles. She bloody hated being in there, and screamed every time I put her back in. I don't blame her, but it did do the trick in the end and her BR levels came back down fairly quickly once they got two lamps on her.
This was Orlaith's first visit to the hospital and you can see how enchanted she is with Esme. She was beautiful with her. She wanted to hold her hand and give her kisses!
When I got Esme out of the box, I was saying things like "Here we go, little chick" and so on, when I put her down in front of Orlaith, the first thing she said was "Oh, hello little chick!"
Classic.
She was very very happy to see us when we came home yesterday and there has been a lot of showing Esme her toys and putting of various items into the Moses basket for Esme. And lots of snuggling of Mummy and a few tears when Mummy was giving Esme her booba and Orlaith wanted to join in and was told she couldn't try some. Oh dear...
There's a few breastfeeding pics in there, so don't click if that kind of thing offends, or if you're at work or whatever. /Warning.