the big "m" word....what ever happened to the "E" word first???...must have skipped that step...
well here goes another depressing journal entry. I really think i need something to happen in my life that makes me happy enough not to think about the bad or depressing. If just thinking about what is going to happen in the next year makes me depressed, what will happen when it IS next year. I really cant promise anyone i will be happy and i cant promise anyone i will be fine. Because it is something new and i will have to adjust. But im going to have to be thrown into this right away. If he gets stationed somewhere im going to be moving with him and then he goes away for 13 weeks of boot camp. But i know in the end its the best thing. It will make all of our problems go away. But we will have to move a lot faster then i thought we ever would. Which means marriage in the next 2 years. And me moving away from what i have. Which really isant anything. Just family, no friends are being left behind. Everyone else is moving away. im just so lost. Maybe i should just do it! Go for it blinded and live my life without thinking of the risks or outcome. Just knowing that i will be safe and taken care of. And with someone i love. far far away from the rest of the world...